


Lola

by paleonpale



Series: Lola [1]
Category: Actor RPF, Benedict Cumberbatch - Fandom, British Actor RPF, Real Person Fiction, Sherlock (TV) RPF
Genre: Angst, Drama, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Lust, Romance, Sexual Tension, Sweet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-05
Updated: 2015-12-13
Packaged: 2017-12-10 11:21:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 49,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/785495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paleonpale/pseuds/paleonpale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Benedict Cumberbatch is guest lecturing at Chloe's university. She finds herself unbelievably attracted to him...despite the fact he is about 16 years her senior.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> As always, constructive criticism is welcome!

Spring 2013

 

Students began filing into the lecture theatre, filling the room with the growing hum of chatting, the rustle of paper, the creaking of chairs. At the front of the lecture theatre, Benedict tapped anxiously at the keys on his laptop, suffering a little from nerves.

 _Get a grip, this isn’t the first time you’ve gotten up to speak in front of an audience,_ he thought to himself, trying to shake off his nervousness. Admittedly, this would be the first time he’d be addressing students and trying to teach them something.

He brought his focus firmly back to finding his lecture slides, the ones he had spent quite a bit of time perfecting if he was honest, and shoved all anxious thoughts from his head.

 _This is just like any other performance_ , he coaxed himself. _Even if most performances don’t come with the need to struggle with difficult projectors_ , he brooded silently, giving said projector an evil glare.

He sighed to himself, hoping today would go smoothly.

* * *

Chloe made her way hurriedly into the lecture theatre, glad that the lights were still up, letting her know she wasn’t as late as she had thought. She quickly found a spot near the front and sat down, setting up her notepad and phone to record the lecture. _Drama, Theatre and Performance_ , she hastily scribbled at the top of the page, not really sure what to expect when it came to taking notes in this class. Chloe was not in fact a drama student, but majored in history and criminology, so she felt a little lost. She silently cursed her flatmate, Brian, who was the only reason why she was even here at nine in the morning, the day after her massive twentieth birthday party. Needless to say, she was quite hungover, but alive and functioning reasonably normally. Brian had decided to take a four week trip right in the middle of the semester, making his way around India, and had begged her to go to his lectures for him. She pointed out that they recorded lectures and had them available for students but he insisted he needed someone to be there to take notes and record the lectures, that she was the only person he trusted to take clear, concise notes. She finally agreed when he offered to clean their flat for a month, no complaints.

Chloe regretted her decision to welcome her twentieth year with partying like there was no tomorrow, but there was nothing for it. She had made a promise. The prospect of not having to clean the flat for a full month helped quite a bit too. So she tried to sit up straight and forced her aching brain to focus.

Up at the front a tall man, looking to be about in his mid-thirties, with rumpled dark wavy hair atop his head, was setting up his laptop, his brow furrowed as he concentrated on whatever was on the screen. Chloe felt like she had seen him somewhere but wasn’t sure. She could hear hushed voices and giggling somewhere behind her. She looked around to the source of the noise to see two girls giggling into their hands, their heads together as they whispered excitedly to each other. Feeling a little puzzled, Chloe turned her gaze back to the man. He seemed to have gotten the projector to finally work, a slideshow up on the big screen now. She watched as he straightened up, stood tall and took an almost imperceptible deep breath and she wondered if he was nervous. He fiddled with the lights and they dimmed, leaving pools of light illuminating the desks.

Then the man spoke, his voice commanding. “Alright, everybody, settle down.”

The voices of the other students around her died down.

“Well, as you all know I’m guest lecturing here for some of the semester." He paced a little as he talked, his eyes taking in the whole room, flitting from face to face. Chloe felt her breath catch inexplicably when his eyes stopped on her, pausing for a fraction of a second. His gaze bore into her and she wondered if she looked as stupefied as she felt. She realised how handsome he was. Sharp, high cheekbones, angular features, his body language screaming easy confidence. She wondered if she had just imagined him seeming nervous. His eyes moved on and she felt a little disappointed, wanting those eyes to stay on her. “My name is Benedict Cumberbatch.” At the mention of his name, the stifled giggling from those girls rose up again and it wasn’t just them—there were soft murmurs across the lecture theatre. Chloe felt perplexed. Who was he?

He made his way back to his laptop and picked up a little clicker and resumed his pacing. He flicked to the first slide of his lecture. “Today we will be covering…”

Chloe tried to listen, she really did but she couldn’t resist just staring at this man as he confidently paced around, his hands gesticulating slightly as he spoke. He didn’t seem to be fazed to be in front of all these people. But then again, you had to get used to that sort of thing being a lecturer, surely. Even so, the thought of doing the same thing put her nerves on edge. She had never been good at speaking in front of other people. She sat there, in the dim light, admiring this charming man. Suddenly she didn’t resent having to be there so much, despite last night’s lasting effects on her queasy stomach and dizzy head.

Oh, and his voice. It seemed to be doing wonderful things to her insides, making muscles deep in her belly clench deliciously.

Chloe mentally scolded herself. _What is wrong with you?? Lusting after some lecturer. Get a grip!_ She had the feeling that he was more than a lecturer, her mind turning to the reaction of the giggling girls and some of the other students in the room. She made a mental note to look him up on the internet later. She also worried momentarily about her lack of note taking and was glad she remembered to record the lecture at least, figuring she could listen to it again later and jot some notes from there. She smiled inwardly, knowing listening to the lecture again wouldn’t be difficult at all, given his velvety smooth voice.

All too soon the lecture was over. The giggling duo actually jumped up and clapped enthusiastically and Chloe’s curiosity about this man was piqued even more.

Feeling uncharacteristically brave, she gathered her things and made her way to the front of the lecture theatre. She approached the man, drinking him in. He was just packing away his laptop when she took a deep breath and said “Hello.”

The man looked up from what he was doing and locked eyes with her. He blinked and he regarded her with a dark glimmer in his eyes. There was something sensual and exciting in the way his eyes took her in, making Chloe’s stomach do a somersault. She suddenly felt like she was the prey, lost in the woods, and he was the wolf, pinning her with his dark gaze. But just as quickly the look in his eyes passed and he looked open and kind. It was as if a dark cloud had passed. Chloe was left reeling slightly at this abrupt change.

“Hi. Can I help you with something?” he asked her, giving her a charming smile.


	2. Chapter 2

Benedict wasn’t sure how it happened. One moment he was busy stuffing his laptop and papers into his bag, his mind on the lecture he just presented, wondering if he’d done a good job and then the next moment...Benedict’s gaze locked with hers and the effect was immediate. He recognised her as one of the students, the one he made proper eye contact with, making him pause. He blinked, taking her in. Small stature, delicate features, big, bright doe eyes, hair up in an artfully messy bun, a nervous smile playing on rosy lips. There was also something in the way she held herself...he felt pulled in by desire almost immediately. He wondered if any of this played on his face because suddenly she looked unsure, her eyes widening ever so slightly as she looked at his face.

_Pull yourself together!_ he scolded himself. He attempted to wipe his face of the sudden appearance of these emotions and gave her his best, hopefully, charming smile.

“Hi. Can I help you with something?”

 * * *

 

The simple question rung out in the silence.

Chloe just stared at him for a bit and realised embarrassingly she hadn’t thought this far ahead. “Well…uh…” Chloe the Articulate, indeed.

He looked like he had realised something. “Oh...were you hoping for an autograph or…?” He looked slightly disappointed but he still smiled at her kindly.

“Autograph?” Chloe asked. This made her even more curious as to who he was.

Confusion flitted across his face. She found it fascinating watching these different emotions cross his handsome face. She wondered what it would be like to kiss those lips and knot her hands in that hair...what was up with her? She rarely came across people who had this effect on her these days and especially not to this extent. She found herself blushing slightly, as if he could read her less than innocent thoughts.

“Oh…I thought you might be a fan…” he ventured.

A fan? “Actually, I was just wondering who you are. It seemed like some of the other students knew who you were and I think I’ve seen you somewhere but I can’t quite place you,” Chloe answered. “And now that you’ve just asked me if I wanted an autograph I’m even more curious.” She smiled at him sweetly, unable to help herself. A newly found part of her felt intrigued by this man, while her more sensible side hoped she didn’t look as flirty as she felt. He was probably nearly twenty years older than her!

He laughed, looking somewhat relieved. “I see. Sorry, I swear I don’t have an inflated sense of self. Well, as I introduced myself at the start of my lecture, I’m Benedict Cumberbatch.” His eyes were twinkling. “And you are…” He held out his hand to her. Those gorgeous eyes bore into hers and she blinked, flushing furiously under that gaze.

“Chloe. Chloe Rowlands,” she smiled up at him, taking his hand, shaking it briefly.

She almost felt as if she had touched a live wire, his touch feeling electric, sending a delicious shiver through her. She let his hand go quickly, though regretted the loss of his touch. His smile grew wider as he noticed her reaction. She wasn’t sure she could go anymore red, but heat rose up her neck, her blush darkening. Jeez! Just from a handshake.  She could only imagine what those hands would feel like on her body.

She mentally shook herself. _Stop. Thinking. These. Things._

He lifted his bag and gestured that they walk. “If you don’t mind, I’ll explain it to you on the way to Joanne’s office. I need to drop off my lecture notes so she’s up to speed with what I’m taking her students through.”

“Er…Joanne?” Chloe asked.

Benedict stopped and gave her an odd look. “Joanne would be your usual lecturer for this class, young Chloe. Shouldn’t you know this?”

Chloe couldn’t help loving the way her name sounded in that mouth of his, even if he seemed to be poking fun at her, but tried ignoring this as best as she could. “Oh. No, I don’t actually do drama.” She quickly explained the situation with her friend and flatmate. “So I’ll be attending his lectures for him the next few weeks,” she finished.

“I see,” Benedict said, nodding in understanding. “So what are you actually studying then, Chloe?” He smiled down at her, locking his bright eyes with hers.

Chloe’s stomach flipped yet again at the sound of her name on those lips, the curve of them as he smiled. “Um, well…” she stammered oh so eloquently. “I’m actually doing a double degree in history and criminology.”

“Hmm…that’s an interesting combination to have chosen, Miss Rowlands. Why did you choose such different subjects to study together?”

Wasn’t this conversation meant to be about who he was? She hoped she could steer this conversation back to its rightful subject. She felt a little flustered under all this attention.  “Well I couldn’t choose which I wanted to study more, so I chose them both. Nothing interesting or mysterious there,” she answered, giving him a little smile, hoping she didn’t look as uncomfortable from his questions as she felt. “You were meant to be telling me who you are, sir.” Sir? She never called anyone sir. She looked at him, hoping she hadn’t offended him or something. Instead he was actually smiling a little, good humour in his expression. She found herself staring at him again, admiring the wonderful planes of his face, the fine lines that creased adorably around his eyes as he smiled. He caught her looking and he shot her a look that made her insides melt a little, before composing his face into that open, honest expression again.

_Why does he keep looking at me like that? And how does anyone flit from facial expression to facial expression like that?_ she wondered, feeling overwhelmed by this little encounter.

“I’m an actor,” he said simply.

Interested, she waited for him to go on. When he didn’t she tried prompting him. “Oh? What have you been in? Movies, plays…?”

“Hmm...well…” Benedict cleared his throat, stalling or thinking, Chloe wasn’t sure.  “I dabble in many things, honestly. Radio, movies, TV, the theatre...one of my most recent successes was playing in Sherlock, which I think is where most people know me from. I’m also in Star Trek Into Darkness, which is coming out soon. I'm also going to be starting work soon in a movie called the Imitation Game...Oh, sorry. I'm beginning to prattle on." He laughed. "I don't want to bore you with all the little details.” He shot her a cute, self-deprecating smile, practically charming the pants off her.

Chloe felt like assuring him he probably wouldn't bore her, that already she wanted to know more about him, but refrained from doing so in case she sounded a little too eager to dig information out of him. She tried acting as cool as possible.

“Wow. That sounds like you must be really busy. So, why are you guest lecturing here?” she asked instead.

“That’s kind of a long story, but essentially I owe Joanne a bit of a favour and she’s been hounding me to try out lecturing.” He shrugged. “I don’t know how good at it I am but I always used to think I’d like to get into teaching. It is a bit hectic though, yes, juggling this and my roles and certain inevitable events that tie in with these things. But it’s good. I like keeping busy.” He looked at Chloe. “How did you find my lecture, Chloe? Not too boring? Stimulating?” He was smiling, in on some private joke of his. Was he flirting with her? Or making fun of her?

She swallowed, his words making her think of rather indecent things not fit for conversation. “It was great. No one seemed bored. So I guess you did a good job of it. But drama and anything associated with it isn’t exactly my strong point,” she said chuckling a little. She also hadn’t been paying all too much attention to what he had been talking about, but he didn’t need to know that.

“Well it’s good to know I held someone’s attention. Ah, here we are.”

Chloe had barely noticed that they had made their way into one of the buildings and up some stairs. They stopped in front of a door, plain except for a name plaque.

Benedict knocked on the door and they waited. Chloe took the opportunity to look up at him surreptitiously and found he was doing the same thing, his eyes on her, that dark look back. It had a wonderful effect on her stomach and certain areas south of that. She noticed she was standing close enough to touch him if she liked. She found herself staring at his lips, wondering how they would feel on her own lips, on her neck, on her…

“Benedict!” The door swung open suddenly, making Chloe jump about a foot in the air. If Benedict was caught off guard as well, he didn’t show it, smiling easily at the woman in the doorway.

“Joanne. Just came by to drop off my lecture notes in person.” Benedict offered her a file.

“Oh, you’re so old fashioned, Benedict. You could have just emailed them to me,” the lady chuckled, taking the file from him and tucking it under her arm.

“Nothing beats face to face interaction in my book.” He glanced at Chloe, giving her a small smile, his eyes twinkling. Yet again he seemed to be in on some joke she wasn’t.

“Well, thank you. How did it go?”

“Good, thank you. Chloe here said I’d done a good job of it,” he said, putting his hand gently on Chloe’s shoulder, his thumb gently and almost imperceptibly stroking it. The sudden touch surprised her and she smiled blankly at Joanne, trying desperately to ignore the feel of his hand on her.

“Oh, well that’s good,” Joanne answered, looking at Chloe. “I don’t think I’ve seen you in my lectures before. But then again, I do have hundreds of students.” She smiled at Chloe kindly.

Chloe didn’t feel like correcting her and explaining why she probably hadn’t ever seen her before today because forming words with Benedict’s hand on her shoulder was proving strangely difficult. Instead she smiled and nodded wordlessly, trying desperately to come up with something to say in the growing silence. Benedict, as if noticing her stiffen with tension, took his hand away. Chloe felt equal parts relief and disappointment.

_What is wrong with me today?_ she wondered. She couldn’t remember the last time she had gotten this tongue tied over a guy.

“Well, I’d better head off,” Benedict said, before the silence got properly awkward. Or perhaps _more_ awkward.

“It was great seeing you again, Joanne.”

“You too. Take care, now.”

They left and outside the building Benedict halted in his steps and smiled at Chloe.

_That smile is too adorable to be allowed_ , Chloe thought to herself.

“So, did you have any other questions, Chloe?”

As a matter of fact she did. She almost couldn’t believe she was actually going to do this but she dove right in. “Yes, actually. I was wondering if maybe…you’d like to get a coffee or something with me sometime.” She silently hoped that she hadn’t misread him, that he was as interested as he seemed to be. She wasn’t always so great at this sort of thing, and she certainly hadn’t done anything like this in a long time, but she hoped she wasn’t making a mistake.

A number of emotions crossed Benedict’s face. It almost looked as if he was having some kind of internal struggle. Surprise to amusement to hesitation in less than a second, then that strange, tempted dark look. Finally he practically winced and shook his head, looking at her. “Sorry, I don’t think I could.” He sounded regretful.

“Oh.” Damn her wishful thinking and abysmal flirting skills! Chloe cast her eyes downward, about to back off or laugh it off like she had been joking. Instead she opened her big mouth yet again. “May I ask why?”

He stared at her, forming the words. He bit his lower lip gently and Chloe couldn’t help staring.

_Ooh, I’d like to do that,_ she thought, feeling very hot all of a sudden. What was it with this guy? Why was he having such an effect on her? _Stop it! He’s just rejected you! And you’re meant to be listening to him explain why he’s rejected you,_ she reminded herself.

“Chloe…” he looked uncomfortable. “You’re too young for me. I mean, you look like you’ve barely turned eighteen.”

“I’m twenty actually.” Just barely…but still.

He laughed. “Well, that’s still quite an age difference. I’d feel like a seedy old man. What would you want to do with an old man like me?”

_Oh, anything you want, sir_. She was barely stopping these thoughts popping into her head now.

She shrugged and didn’t answer, not really trusting herself, peering up at him under her lashes. Where was her newfound playfulness coming from? “Well it was worth a try,” she said finally. She began to turn to leave. “I guess I’ll see you at your next lecture. It was nice meeting you, Benedict.” She smiled and before he could say anything she turned and walked away, hoping she wouldn’t fall over. She felt very glad that she had dressed herself well in a fitted, high-waisted skirt that day instead of her usual hangover-recovery comfort sweats. She swayed her hips a little, hoping he was noticing the show she was putting on for him.

What had this man done to her? And all under two hours of meeting him. She supposed it didn’t matter now anyway and she sighed inwardly for that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this chapter :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally! An update! :D I find it takes AGES for me to write and edit my writing, as I get very critical about it. But never mind that I guess. I hope you enjoy this new chapter!

That evening, Chloe found herself sitting in front of her computer, staring blankly at the screen. She had Google open, her fingers itching to type in the words Benedict Cumberbatch. She had been debating with herself the past five minutes whether or not it was a good idea to dive into this quest for more knowledge on this man. A part of her felt like she was likely to regret it. After what had happened that day she had resolved to not even think about him again, as his rejection was still causing her a fair bit of embarrassment. She wondered what she had even been thinking asking him out. She couldn’t help cringing when she thought about it.

 _You were thinking he is ridiculously attractive and you were keen to spend a bit more time with him, get to know him a little better_ , her helpful brain reminded her. She sighed. She wound her hand in her ash blonde hair, the way she usually did when she was distracted or worried. Or in this case, feeling indecisive.

What harm could a bit of information searching do, really? She typed his name into the search engine with lightning speed and hit the Enter key before she could change her mind. Soon she was absorbed in clicking on various links, reading interviews and various articles and staring at his face in a sea of photos. She didn’t watch a great deal of television or the sort of movies he had been in so she supposed that explained why she hadn’t immediately recognised him. She also learned of all his work on stage and realised that must be why he hadn't seemed bothered presenting a lecture in front of students. Almost as if trying to make up for her ignorance, she spent quite a bit of time watching anything she could find on him on YouTube and reading almost everything she found on him. She was so engrossed in watching him, listening to his voice that she didn’t notice her other flatmate sneak into her room until she suddenly spoke up behind her.

“Why are you watching Benedict Cumberbatch interviews?”

Chloe yelped as her heart leapt into her throat from fright.

“Jesus, Alex! Why do you always have to sneak up on me like that??” she yelled shrilly, her hand on her chest, above her frantically beating heart.

Alex laughed out loud. “Because it never gets old scaring the crap out of you?” She patted Chloe on the head sympathetically. “So why the sudden interest in Benedict?” she asked.

Chloe looked back at the screen, the paused interview showing Benedict sitting on a couch, in mid-sentence.

“Oh, no real reason…how do you know him?”

“I really liked Sherlock, Parade’s End, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy...” Alex answered, shrugging. “I’ve asked you a bunch of times to watch these things with me but you were always reading or studying because you’re a massive bore.” She smiled sweetly down at Chloe.

Chloe poked her tongue out. “That is not all I do. Anyway, I’m not doing either of those things now, am I?”

Alex chuckled, tucking an escaped lock of hair behind her ear. “I see that. So why the sudden interest in Benedict?” she asked again.

Chloe sighed. “You know how Brian asked me to go to some of his lectures for him? The ones that don’t clash with my classes? Benedict is a guest lecturer for one of his classes." 

Alex’s eyes widened. “Seriously? Wow…how does he even have time to do that?”

Chloe shrugged, remembering how she had asked the same question.

Alex’s smile suddenly turned mischievous. “Do you have a crush, little miss Lola?” she asked, using Chloe’s middle name, knowing full well that it irritated her. She had never really liked her middle name and tended to keep  it to herself lest anyone find out, but Alex had seen a bill addressed to Chloe, her full name stamped out clearly for all the world to see. Now Alex liked dropping it now and again to get a rise out of Chloe.

Chloe rolled her eyes. “Of course I don't have a crush!” Her loud response made her all the more unconvincing.

Alex gasped. “You do! This is amazing! I don’t think you’ve ever had a crush on anyone in the time I’ve known you, let alone show any interest in anyone!”

“Sure I have…”

“When we do go out and you meet someone you seem to be interested in them momentarily…but then it doesn’t progress past a conversation.”

“It’s not my fault so many guys are uninteresting,” Chloe replied, rolling her eyes. “But it’s not like I haven’t had any relationships.”

"You mean ones that last past breakfast the next morning or…?”

Chloe swatted Alex’s arm, laughing a little. “That happened once and I regretted it because he turned out to be a frightful bore. Clearly alcohol made him more interesting.” She thought for a bit. “But I guess you’re right. I haven’t been with another person for any real length of time, have I?” Chloe frowned as she realised this. She had her own reasons for keeping herself away from the kind of interactions that might lead to a relationship, and it was like she was on autopilot when she avoided the whole relationship thing, but actually thinking about it made her a little...sad.

“Nope,” Alex answered her unnecessarily, patting her on the head again.

“I guess I just haven’t been interested.” Chloe shrugged, thinking that wasn't a complete lie. It would take someone _rather_ special to convince her that relationships were a good thing. 

“And then along comes Benedict and you’re smitten already!” 

Alex dodged a pen Chloe threw at her as she ran out of the room, cackling. 

Chloe wasn’t yet prepared to admit that Alex was entirely right. She liked Benedict. Watching his interviews gave her the chance to see how well articulated and how humble and self-deprecating he was. She found that in particular so endearing. You could tell this was a truly talented actor but he was just so laid back about it. She found herself wanting to watch everything he’d ever starred in, that these little clips she’d found all over the internet were not enough. When she discovered he had done plenty of audiobooks she restrained from seeking them out. She’d been at her computer for a couple of hours now and she felt downright creepy at this point. But oh, to be able to listen to that voice reading stories…she sighed thinking about it.

 

* * *

 

Nearly a week passed in which Chloe conducted her life as she usually did except most of her nights were now reserved for watching Benedict in the various roles he’d played—from the incredibly convincing Stephen Hawking to the majorly creepy Paul Marshall in Atonement to the heartbreakingly sad James in Third Star.  Or she would listen to his interviews or audiobooks. It became her little habit that she happily sank into. She genuinely enjoyed his work but in a way she was dangling what she couldn’t have in front of herself, torturing herself a little.

She knew she needed to get a grip and just move on from this weird fascination but she found herself really not wanting to. She figured she would eventually get over it sooner or later. A part of her hoped fervently for it to be sooner. Things needed to get back to normal, she needed to be able to go back into her nice cushy, if lonely, comfort zone. She was completely out of her depth pining after Mr. Cumberbatch. She found she just could not stop herself.

Then came the morning of the drama theory lecture. She wanted to be able to see him again, what person with a bit of a crush wouldn’t? But the sting of his rejection was still there and she cringed, still feeling a little embarrassed about her failed advance.

She made it to the lecture early, telling herself it was just because she was being her usual punctual self. She wasn’t hoping to catch Benedict's attention or maybe watch him set up for the lecture, no, not at all. A few people were already there, scattered about the lecture theatre, yawning, talking quietly.

Chloe seated herself where she had sat the week before. When she had come in she had tried keeping herself from looking to the front of the theatre and seeking out Benedict but couldn’t help glancing over as she sat down. She stamped down on her disappointment when she noticed he hadn’t arrived yet.

About ten minutes later, the doors towards the front of the theatre opened and there he was. As he made his way to the little podium, his eyes combed the faces of the students before resting on Chloe. His lips curled slightly as he caught sight of her, making her stomach clench a little. She gave him a small, polite smile and went back to preparing her notes, not wanting to appear as eager to see him as she actually felt.

As he set up his laptop and found the presentation files he needed, Chloe thought she felt his eyes on her again and again but resisted looking up to check. She figured it was just wishful thinking. _He said you’re too young for him. Meaning he isn’t interested_ , she reminded herself.

Finally the lights went down, giving Chloe a sense of anonymity and freedom to seek out his face. He was the lecturer after all and she had to pay attention to him, right? He was leaning against the podium, looking straight at her. His smile and expression was friendly and yet it felt like his eyes were burning into her and she couldn't identify what she saw there, but whatever it was, she could feel her heartbeat quicken in response. Chloe felt thankful for the dimness of the room, her cheeks feeling very warm.

“Alright, everybody, let's get started.” His gaze still remained on her, but the look in his eyes had gone. If she hadn't seen that look there before today she would have thought she had imagined it.

She snapped out of it and fumbled with her glasses, perching them on her nose in an attempt to busy herself and make it seem like she hadn't noticed he was staring or like she didn't care. She also checked that her phone was recording before finally turning her focus to the front of the lecture theatre. Thankfully, he was no longer looking at her, but was doing his usual pacing as he talked.

Chloe made an effort to pay close attention and dutifully made notes. She tried very hard not to get distracted listening to that voice, or watching him as he talked and moved.

“Well, that about wraps up this lecture. Thank you,” Benedict said about an hour later. He welcomed students to approach him with questions if they had any.

Chloe packed up her things quickly, shoving them all in her bag and when she looked up, she noticed Benedict was still at the little podium, slowly packing away his things while answering questions from the small group of students that had gathered around him. She made a split second decision and hurried up to the front to line up behind the last student who was asking Benedict questions. She could hear what they were saying and was glad for him that it was related to the lecture content and not the fact that Benedict was an actor. She wasn't sure why she felt this way, but she couldn't help thinking he preferred to keep his actor status separate from his efforts at lecturing.

She took the opportunity of being nearby him to study him up close. He was attentive and responsive, even while packing away his things, pausing here and there to gesture with his hands as he talked. Chloe had noticed he was prone to using his hands while he spoke in interviews. She found herself thinking he had quite attractive hands—something she was weirdly critical about when it came to men. He had his hair slicked back today, making him look somewhat older and mature, which seemed to just make him even more alluring to her somehow. To have those hands on her body, that hair under her own hands, knotting and pulling... She swatted the thoughts away, hoping fervently that they weren't written all over her face.

Finally the girl in front of her left and Chloe stepped forward. Benedict, in the act of lifting his bag, froze, a look of surprise on his face. Chloe was a little perplexed herself, still trying to come up with a good reason why she was about to bother him again. She had been too busy creepily studying his appearance to think of a legitimate reason for talking to him. But as quick as that he wiped the look of surprise from his face and smiled at her.

“Chloe. What can I do for you today?”

She just stared at him, transfixed by those eyes. His smile turned into a grin of amusement and Chloe felt herself blushing. He was laughing at her! Oh, why did she even think this was a good idea? She could only imagine how stupid she looked. At least her mouth hadn't gone slack, drool dribbling from her mouth. Why did she have to get so tongue tied around this man??

She cleared her throat to say she didn't really need anything and that she was just leaving to go dig herself into a hole and hide there forever but he spoke up first. “How did you find today’s lecture?”

Chloe recovered quickly, glad to have something to talk about. “It was good...and interesting, even for someone who doesn't do drama.”

“That's good to hear. Did you have any questions?”

She racked her brain to think of anything she hadn't understood or maybe wanted more information on but couldn't really think of anything. She hated how blank her mind got when talking to Benedict. His presence totally threw her off in a way she was not used to. She tried to remember the last time a man had this much of an effect on her and came up empty.

Finally she shook her head slightly, giving him a small, almost apologetic smile. 

He gazed at her for a bit, head slightly cocked to the side. He seemed to hesitate before saying, “Well, you know, I could give you my email...maybe if you think of something you could just write to me.”

 _That velvety voice coming out of those full lips should be illegal_ , she thought to herself. Then it suddenly dawned on her that he was offering her a reason and a chance to communicate with him further. She felt stunned but composed herself, reminding herself that he was speaking as a lecturer, not a would-be admirer. This wasn't a sign that he liked her any more than he did when he was oh so gently squashing her advance the other week.

“Sure. That'd be great,” she found herself saying, sounding more kept together and confident than she felt.

He whipped out a pen from his jacket pocket and held out his hand to Chloe. She looked at him questioningly but realised a second later what he wanted. She hesitated for a brief moment before putting her hand in his, trying to ignore how wonderful his skin felt against hers.

“I won't bite,” he said, smirking, as he turned Chloe's hand over in his. As he carefully wrote on her hand, she realised just how close they were. She peered up at him as he stooped a little over her small hand in his. Not for the first time she noticed he was quite a bit taller than her. She then inexplicably found herself staring at the strong column of his throat. She tried taking a deep breath as quietly as possible and ended up with a head full of the scent coming off him. He smelled like crisp, clean laundry but with a very faint, pleasant earthy saltiness underneath it. She breathed it in, finding it absolutely irresistible.

“Did you just smell me?” Benedict's voice cut through her creepy sniffing. Apparently she wasn’t being as discreet as she thought.

Chloe's gaze flew up to meet his eyes. Instead of seeing a disturbed expression on his face, he looked like a mixture of pleasantly surprised and like he was about to laugh in disbelief. She bit her lip, feeling embarrassed to be caught doing something so weird. She noticed he glanced at her mouth, that dark, smouldering look in his eyes again. 

Before either of them could say anything more, a figure skipped into view in Chloe's peripheral vision. “Oh, Lolaaa!” the person trilled and she immediately recognised them, groaning to herself quietly. She swivelled around to glare at Alex as she practically bounced towards them. Alex loved to embarrass her whenever she could and normally Chloe took it lightly but she did not need someone to embarrass her in front of Benedict when she had already done a very good job of it herself.

Benedict released Chloe's hand. She hadn't realised he had still been holding it until that point. 

“Alex.” Chloe's voice dripping with false friendliness. “What are you doing here?” And why did she have to use her middle name in front of Benedict? She tried not to glare too much at her bubbly flatmate.

“Oh, you know, thought I'd pick you up before our next class.” She smiled sweetly at Chloe, her green eyes dancing with laughter, knowing full well their next class together wasn't until after lunch. She turned her gaze to Benedict. “Hello, my name is Alex.” She held out her hand to him. Sometimes Chloe seriously envied her easy confidence. 

“Benedict. Nice to meet you.” He shook her hand and smiled, looking between the two girls.

Chloe was surprised Alex wasn't gushing more over the fact that she was in the presence of one of her favourite actors. 

The silence stretched on, while Alex stared at Chloe pointedly, her eyes screaming at her to say something to Benedict. She may as well have been hopping from foot to foot, holding a sign above her head with the words "TALK TO HIM YOU BLOODY FOOL" stamped across it in bold.

Benedict was the first to break the silence. “Well, I need to get going.” He glanced at his watch and smiled at the two of them. “It was nice meeting you, Alex.” He settled a hand on Chloe's shoulder and fixed her with one of his gazes, his bright eyes pinning her. “Hope to hear from you...Lola.” 

Chloe blinked in surprise to hear the name she had always disliked on those lips...somehow she didn't mind the name so much coming from him. The roll of the letters on his tongue and the sound of his deep voice carrying the name toward her felt almost sensual. She managed a little squeak and a small nod. She couldn't believe he was having an effect on her just by saying her _name_. A name she didn't even like.

He seemed to notice her strange reaction and his grin widened slightly, looking slightly wicked. “Goodbye,” he said, waving slightly at them before he walked out of the lecture theatre.

Chloe just stared after him, wondering how on earth someone could have such an effect on her by doing the most regular things, by not even _trying_.

“Wow, you do have it bad,” Alex piped up, studying Chloe closely, laughing a little. “I mean you didn't even snap at him for calling you Lola.”

“Oh, shut up,” Chloe grumbled.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've probably made Chloe so weirdly creepy in this chapter :S
> 
> As always, I like hearing from anyone who is enjoying the story, or anyone who might have constructive criticism! :)


	4. Chapter 4

Benedict was staring out the window, watching the overcast sky beginning to clear a little. Where the thin, wispy grey clouds gave way to the blue, he couldn't help being reminded of the colour of those wide eyes staring up at him. He didn't think he'd seen eyes a mixture of soft grey and blue before meeting the younger woman. _Chloe. Lola_. The names made circles inside his head. Despite trying his hardest, sometimes he couldn't stop himself thinking about her.

“Benedict.”

He continued staring out the window, his finger tapping his lip gently as he thought, clearly miles away from the office in which he sat. He had found himself thinking of her retreating figure the day they had first met. He mentally traced her petite figure in his head; the tight skirt she had been wearing clinging to her little waist, the swell of her hips, bum and thighs as she had walked away.

“Benedict!” 

He snapped out of it, brought sharply back to reality. His publicist, Karen, was leaning across her desk, clicking her fingers in front of his face.

“Hmm?” 

“Haven't you heard a word I've been saying?”

Benedict looked a little guiltily at her, shaking his head. They were having this meeting to arrange what interviews and press conferences he was going to be appearing at and discussing what he wanted to do.

She gave him an odd look. “Got a lot on your mind have you?” 

Benedict just shrugged and smiled apologetically. “Something like that.”

She decided to leave it alone. “Well, I've just been saying, you have the Star Trek Into Darkness press conference in London on the 2nd of May and we also need to discuss what interviews you'll be doing for promoting the movie and you, of course.”

Benedict nodded, already beginning to half-listen again. He had been feeling especially distracted the past few days. He found himself checking his emails constantly, every time the little ringtone went off he felt a tense sort of excitement, but was disappointed each time he saw it wasn't from Chloe.

He almost couldn't believe he was waiting for an email from her. He was the one who had turned her down a week or so ago. And even if she did email it wouldn't be about anything personal. So why did he feel like he was waiting for a call after a first date or something?

“Earth to Benedict,” Karen's voice drifted towards him, cutting through his thoughts again.

His eyes refocused to see Karen, looking a little exasperated but like she found something quite funny at the same time.

“You know, I don't think I've ever seen you this distracted before.”

“I'm sorry. I really don't know what's gotten into me.” He shook himself mentally, trying to refocus. He felt bad that he hadn't really been paying attention this whole time, feeling entirely unprofessional. Normally his personal assistant would be in charge of taking care of this kind of meeting but she had been unavailable that day.

Benedict consciously shut his mind off from distracting thoughts and they discussed the upcoming events. It had been such a hectic couple of years and this one wasn't looking any less busy, especially after taking on the added role of lecturer for a few weeks. But he loved it. It was the life he had always dreamed of and often found himself feeling incredibly fortunate to be living it now.

Not long later, he exited the building, pushing his hands into his pockets as he headed over to where he had parked his car. He felt slightly relieved to see there were no photographers or anything waiting for him. His brain was still muddled with thoughts of the bright eyed girl. It wasn't that he'd never felt a certain fixation with other women in his life before but this felt slightly different. Perhaps it was her age. Some people wouldn't have thought twice about it but normally he would never have entertained such thoughts of a person so much younger than him. It made him feel a little strange. But at the same time he knew it couldn't just be about the age difference. There was something about the girl that he couldn't help finding intriguing, something he immediately connected with the moment he saw her. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, it certainly wasn't something he thought he'd experienced before, but there it was.

He got in his car and sat back, just sitting there for a bit, staring ahead of him. He tried reminding himself that he was just thinking about her and it was very unlikely that anything was going to come of it. With that in his mind, he made a conscious effort to forget about the strangely ethereal girl, with her pale and delicate features, shoving the thoughts of those bright eyes and adorably mischievous smile out of his head.

 

*  *  *

 

It was a rainy Friday evening and Chloe was sitting in front of her computer, finishing up one of her final assignments for the semester. All she had to do was polish up the references and she was done. This assignment wasn't due for another week or so but she had completely thrown herself into her studies the past week. This meant she had essentially done all her remaining assignments and had even begun revising for exams, which were still a few weeks away. Alex had left the flat to go out with friends for drinks, teasing Chloe lightly for having her nose in her textbooks for another night in a row. Chloe just turned around in her seat and waved her away, muttering to herself.

For the hundredth time that week, she glanced at the little notepad she kept on her desk. Scrawled upon it were reminders and short notes, along with the email of a certain unbelievably attractive and unattainable man. She looked away quickly. She had strictly kept herself from thinking about him, knowing he was not interested in her and knowing her energy was better spent studying at the moment. And not thinking about him. Not those eyes. Or that mouth. Or that voice.

She let her head drop against her books and groaned to herself. Despite keeping herself busy the past week she still couldn't help thinking about him when her mind was not immediately occupied with something else. It was especially bad when she went to bed, where she lay in the dark, thinking about what it would be like to have him there in the dark with her, what those hands would feel like on her body, his deep voice in her ear. She had never felt so sexually frustrated as she had the past couple of weeks after meeting him. Usually she was more interested in getting to know a guy first. While she wanted to get to know the intensely private man better and found him so mysterious and alluring, she couldn't help wanting to jump his bones, very badly. Maybe it was simply because she hadn't met anyone who had the same effect on her that Benedict did, not in a long time.

Chloe had thought about emailing him so many times she had lost count. Each time she had convinced herself it was a bad idea. She hadn't a clue what she would even say. She had considered making up some questions concerning his last lecture but wasn't entirely sure where that would even get her. He would answer the questions and that would be it. What she really wanted was an excuse to see him again. She shook her head, wondering if she had really become this weirdly obsessive person.

She looked out the window, her eyes faraway, listening to the gentle sound of the rain.

She decided to just call it a night. She saved her work, shut her textbooks and switched off the computer. She made her way to the kitchen and poured herself a small glass of red wine. She headed to the front room and made herself comfy on the sofa and flicked through channels on the television, not really seeing anything interesting to watch. She had just switched off the television, deciding she was better off with a book or something, when Alex came bounding through the door, her face a little flushed.

Chloe looked at her watch and snorted. “Wow, you're back home early. It's only half past ten.”

Alex threw down her jacket and bag on the armchair next to Chloe.

“Yeah. Everyone cancelled so I thought I'd rather come home instead of be out on my own. Bo-ring.” She shrugged and seated herself next to Chloe, grabbing her glass of wine and downing it. Chloe tutted at her disapprovingly.

“Oh shush, I'll get you more.” Alex proceeded to grab the whole bottle of wine and an extra glass for Chloe from the kitchen. She returned and poured them both generous amounts of wine.

“Alex. I have work tomorrow morning.”

“Oh, come on. We haven't had a drink together for ages!”

It had actually only been about two weeks, but Chloe tried to avoid having drinks with Alex as much as possible. This was mainly because Chloe tended to go overboard whenever she was with Alex. The last time she had been drinking with her friend was on her birthday and she'd had the worst hangover the next day.

 _Which was also the day you met Benedict,_ she reminded herself unnecessarily. She had thought about that day countless times and how her advances had failed rather miserably.

“I promise, it'll just be a couple of drinks.” Alex looked at her sweetly. “I won't keep you up too late.”

Chloe looked at friend's eager expression and shook her head, giving in. “Fine! But just one drink okay?”

Alex nodded, her eyes wide with false innocence.

A couple of hours and quite a few glasses of wine later, Chloe had found herself telling Alex about having Benedict's email and feeling conflicted about what to do. On the one hand she wanted to talk to him but on the other she knew he'd only be interested in talking about his lecture material, nothing outside of that. He had made it very clear that he didn't want to see her on a personal basis.

“Chloe,” Alex slurred. “You should just email him and tell him you have some questions about his last lecture!” 

“But I don't have any questions.”

Alex rolled her eyes. “Haven't you ever heard of lying a little? Maybe you could say you didn't take very good notes and that you have some gaps or holes that need filling.” She paused. “So to speak.” She cackled loudly at her own joke, poking Chloe in the ribs, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

Chloe made a face at Alex, rubbing her side. “Very mature, you idiot. He's not interested in filling any holes.” Chloe couldn't help snorting with suppressed laughter.

“I'm sure he is,” Alex said, staring at Chloe pointedly, which didn't really have the effect the girl wanted, her eyes going a little cross eyed.

It was Chloe's turn to roll her eyes. “He's not interested in me. Unfortunately,” she added quietly, pouring herself another glass of wine.

“Well anyway, you could always just say you need clarification on some points or that Brian always needs complete notes or he'll go crazy.”

Chloe thought of her other flatmate and knew that this was not at all what he was like. The drama theory class was his least favourite because it involved the least amount of what he termed “actual drama work”. He had always said he preferred hands on work, not having to learn about the origins and history of things.

But somehow, Alex's words were getting to her. Why shouldn't she contact Benedict? He had been giving her so many weird signals, most of which told her in the back of her head that he was interested in her. With her sudden feelings of clarity and boldness she snatched up her phone from the little coffee table and lurched towards her room, Alex following closely behind. Chloe went towards her desk, grabbing the little notebook. She wobbled over to her bed and sat down heavily beside Alex who was looking at her expectantly.

Chloe unlocked her phone and opened her email app. She carefully typed in Benedict's email and began typing out the half-formed message in her head.

 

_Mr. Cumberbatch,_

_There are some questions I would like to ask you about your last lecture. As you may remember, I am taking your class on behalf of a friend of mine and I feel like the notes I took that day are not as clear as I would like them to be. My friend is a bit of a control freak when it comes to complete and clear notes and I was wondering if you could fill in some of the gaps in my note-taking._

_Hope to hear from you soon,_

_Chloe Rowlands_

 

It took some time to type out the message and not sound like she was completely off her face. She read over the message and was surprised she was making any sense at all, given the words were swimming before her eyes, alcohol still crawling through her veins. Alex was reading over her shoulder and nodded her approval and urged Chloe to send it. She pressed the Send button. She still wasn't sure what she was going to ask him but it was a start. At that point, wine-boosted confidence and bravery kept her from worrying about what she would say should he reply. She also cringed slightly at her formal tone but he was meant to be “her” lecturer. She was pretty proud of herself for not saying something more embarrassing.

Without another word, she tossed her phone onto her bed and headed for the bathroom, leaving Alex to roll about on Chloe's bed, humming to herself. When she came back, Alex was excitedly waving Chloe's phone in her face.

“You've got a reply already!” She screeched, clearly excited.

Chloe felt surprised that he had replied already, what with it being a Friday night. Her stomach erupted with butterflies as she looked at her phone and saw it was indeed a reply from Benedict. She had figured he must have more of a life than she did or was at least busy with something and wasn't expecting to get a reply as soon as she had. She opened the email with shaking fingers from a sudden rush of adrenaline.

_Miss Rowlands,_

_I would be happy to assist you. Just send along your questions and I will do what I can to answer._

_If you don't mind my asking, why do you feel your notes aren't as clear as they could be? You strike me as the kind of student who pays attention and doesn't get distracted easily._

_Sincerely,_

_Benedict Cumberbatch_

 

She still felt a little amazed that he had replied so quickly and also re-read his impressions of her. He was right about what kind of student she was but couldn't help wondering if that made her seem boring to him. _Oh, get a grip! It doesn't matter whether he thinks you're interesting or not, remember?_ she reminded herself quickly. She decided to be a little flirty in composing her reply.

 

_Mr. Cumberbatch,_

_If it's alright with you, I would prefer to discuss the matter in person. Just like you, I prefer “face to face interaction”._

_As for getting distracted, and what kind of a student I am, you are entirely right. But it's quite hard not to get distracted when your lecturer is incredibly attractive and charming. You are a very distracting presence, Mr. Cumberbatch._

_Chloe Rowlands_

 

Chloe found herself giggling madly as she passed the phone over to Alex for proof reading. She found she couldn't resist quoting him from their first meeting. She wondered at her boldness momentarily but Alex gave her a grin of approval. Only later would she realise that of course Alex would approve of her forwardness and that alone should have made Chloe pause and think a little harder about what she was doing. But quick as that, she pressed the Send button before she could change her mind. She was probably going to regret this in the morning but right now she felt not the least bit regret about being honest with him, even inappropriately so.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you've enjoyed this chapter! As usual, I always appreciate hearing from anyone who is enjoying my story, or anyone who might have constructive criticism :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check the notes at the end of this chapter for some classic grovelling and apologising for not updating for a couple of months :D along with some announcement-type things. For now, on to the new chapter! Enjoy!

Benedict was on set Friday night, shooting some scenes for Sherlock. He kept stealing away to type up replies to Chloe’s emails, getting some odd looks from people. Someone had commented that they’d never seen him so glued to his phone. So during a short break, he stole away, shutting himself in his dressing room, hoping for a bit of privacy. He read Chloe’s latest reply a second time, feeling rather surprised. Attractive and charming, she had said. He was by no means used to the sort of compliments he got sometimes and he wondered if he ever would. He noticed that she was still flirting with him which made him smile a slow, wicked smile despite himself.

The past couple of weeks had been a constant battle between his more rational side and his more adventurous side and tonight it was somewhat worse as he was actually talking to her, and not just daydreaming about her idly. There was something about her that pulled him in and he felt like he wanted to get to know her better, despite the fact that she was quite a bit younger than him. He thought he’d feel like a seedy old man if he pursued her and he had been determined to put all thoughts of her out of his mind. But he felt his resolve weakening. Benedict found her rather attractive and hadn't been able to get her out of his head—her voice, the mischievous twinkle in her eyes, her figure, the way she walked, how her cheeks blushed scarlet at the slightest suggestion. She also had a way of smiling in a devilish sort of way that clashed wonderfully with her otherwise innocent-looking face.

His fingers paused over his phone as he wondered what he should say.

Finally, the side of him that wanted to plunge into whatever heady chemistry they had between them won over his more rational side.

 

*  *  *

 

Chloe was restlessly (and clumsily) tidying her room, an old movie on in the background. Alex had gone to the kitchen and hadn’t returned, making Chloe think she had probably fallen asleep somewhere in the flat. She was almost like a cat that way, curling up to sleep wherever and she was especially prone to doing this after drinking, even if there were more comfortable places to sleep.

It had been an hour or so since Chloe had sent the flirty email. She wouldn’t admit it out loud but she was anxiously awaiting Benedict’s reply and tidying was sometimes her way of getting pent up, nervous energy out of her system. In her tipsy state she wasn’t sure how good of a job she was doing of it but it was keeping her hands busy and required her to concentrate on not knocking things over. She began fretting over whether she shouldn’t have flirted with him, feeling that maybe she had overstepped the line.

As she was rearranging the books in her bookcase, she heard the little email notification noise from where she’d left her phone on her bed. She nearly dropped her books in surprise. She quickly crossed the room and scooped up her phone and saw the email was from Benedict, making her stomach flip.

 

_Miss Rowlands_

_Should you really be flirting with your lecturer? But since we do seem to agree on “face to face interaction” I guess I have no choice but to accept your request. Maybe we could discuss your questions over coffee this Sunday?_

_Sincerely,_

_Benedict Cumberbatch_

 

Chloe stared at the glowing words before her eyes, hardly daring to believe she had succeeded in getting him to agree to see her. She smiled, starting to type up her reply.

 

_Mr. Cumberbatch_

_Apologies, Mr. Cumberbatch. Flirting isn’t my strong point and I guess I wasn’t as subtle as I had hoped. But with a face like yours, I can hardly be blamed for wanting to flirt a little, albeit badly. But it won’t happen again._

_Thank you for agreeing to meet me. Coffee this Sunday would be great. Is there any specific place you would like to meet?_

_Kind regards_

_Chloe Rowlands_

 

Her flirting skills really were terrible but it couldn’t really be helped. Chloe sent the email, stifling a yawn as she did so. She decided she should start getting ready for bed, wincing when she noticed the time. She had work the next morning, and it looked like she was likely to only get a couple of hours sleep.

When she returned to her room she switched off the lights and hopped into bed, clutching her phone. She had a reply.

 

_Miss Rowlands,_

_If you don't mind my choosing the place, I think we should go to one of my favourite cafés. I know the owners and I can at least guarantee myself a bit of privacy, if that it happens to be an issue on Sunday. Perhaps you could give me your number so I can text you the details?_

_Sincerely, Benedict Cumberbatch_

_P.S.: Maybe I don’t mind the flirting._

 

Chloe grinned to herself, feeling like a silly schoolgirl with a big crush. She quickly typed up her reply, telling him she didn’t mind if he chose the place and gave him her number. After that she promptly fell asleep, no longer able to fight off her drowsiness.

 

* * *

 

Chloe had fallen asleep with her phone against her face. Her alarm was blasting the radio, wrenching her out of sleep. She rubbed at her eyes, beginning to feel the ache in her head. She groaned to herself, wanting nothing more than to drink some water and go back to bed. But she had work that day so a sleep in was not an option.

She hauled herself out of bed and began getting ready, the previous night’s events eluding her mind for the moment. It was as she was munching tentatively on some fruit toast, hoping her roiling stomach wouldn't reject it, when she suddenly remembered the emails. She gasped loudly, feeling dread coil in her belly and lunged for her phone, which she had chucked haphazardly into her bag earlier as she was getting ready.

As she unlocked her phone, she silently hoped that it had all been a dream but as she opened her email app, her fears were confirmed. She quickly looked through their conversation and felt her cheeks flush with embarrassment at her own emails to Benedict. But she felt surprised and a small part of her almost felt triumphant that he had agreed to meet her. 

However, now that her judgement was no longer impaired, she suddenly didn't think it would be a good idea at all to meet him on Sunday. Sometime between last night and this morning her sense and the cautiousness she had always prided herself in had returned to her. She toyed with the idea of cancelling but she decided then that she would meet him, if only to apologise in person for her behaviour. He had made it clear that he wasn't interested in her, so why had she thought it was a good idea to push the issue? She cringed as she wondered what kind of impression she'd made on him.

Feeling slightly gloomy and embarrassed of herself she finished her breakfast. She found Alex dead to the world on the sofa, snoring lightly and mumbling in her sleep. Chloe filled up a glass of water and set it on the coffee table for her friend to find when she woke up later. Finally, she swung her bag over her shoulder and left the flat, wishing she didn't need to work that day.

 

* * *

 

Chloe approached the little café and ducked inside out of the crisp morning air. Despite not being too keen to work that day, Chloe was generally pretty happy about where she worked and liked her job well enough. The charming little café was a short walk from her flat and was owned by the Moore’s, who were a friendly married couple. Chloe had worked there for a couple of years, since her first year at university, so it was very familiar to her.

She wound her way through the little tables and went behind the counter, greeting Mrs Moore, who was setting out sandwiches in the fridge. She went on through the kitchen to the back room where they all stowed their bags and bumped into Richard.

“Morning, Chloe,” he greeted her, his usual friendly, playful grin on his face.

“Hi, Richard,” Chloe answered, stuffing her bag in her usual locker. Richard was a fellow employee and had been working there about as long as Chloe. He was an outrageous flirt, always playfully flirting with the girls who worked at the café, Chloe included. He seemed to flirt with anything that moved. But he was nice and friendly enough so Chloe tolerated the flirting and had given up trying to get him to stop.

“Waitressing today?” he asked casually.

“Uh, I think so.” Chloe stifled a yawn. “Probably will get asked to make the coffees too since you still can't make coffee for shit,” she poked fun at him, perhaps a little grouchily.

“Ouch, no need to be cruel,” he said, holding a hand over his heart dramatically. “Rough night?” 

She made a noise of agreement, taking a swig of water from her water bottle and put an end to the conversation she didn't feel like having by making her way out of the back room to begin the rigours of the day. She normally would be friendlier and felt a little bad for brushing Richard off but she was hungover and a little grumpy with herself and really didn't feel like putting on an overly happy face unless it was absolutely necessary.

The day passed rather quickly, Saturday being one of their busier days. It was late afternoon and Chloe was in the kitchen, helping with some of the washing up, thinking about Benedict and the effect he was having on her. As she squished her gloved hands through soap suds, she began looking back over her behaviour when she was around him. She suddenly realised that there was something about him that made her want to shuck her usual careful nature. Even from the day they had met, there were little signs here and there of her doing things completely out of her nature. Chloe rarely approached men, even when she was interested in them, but with Benedict she almost hadn't been able to help herself. She also rarely got attached or overly obsessive about anyone, making sure she never let herself, in a silly attempt to make sure she never got hurt. Cliche behaviour perhaps, even if she had her own reasons for behaving this way. And her emails the night before! She cringed remembering the things she said.

Chloe was quickly drying up the dishes when she was called out of the kitchen to help run the register and she got the surprise of her life when she looked up to see two familiar eyes under a rumple of dark hair. She froze, taking in the sight of Benedict Cumberbatch in the little café, patiently waiting to be served.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY an update, right? :D I have been absolutely terrible updating this fic and I really am sorry for anyone who was/has been waiting for an update. I really felt like I would be able to juggle uni work and other stuff with writing but I guess not! I still have exams coming up but I felt like I couldn't put updating off any longer.  
> *rains many apologies, cupcakes, pictures of Benedict with his Alan Turing hair (does anyone else find the hairstyle as yummy on him as I do?), puppies and flowers upon you all*  
> In my defence I genuinely have been working on bits and pieces of this story whenever I’ve found the time or when inspiration/encouragement struck (such as when The Desolation of Smaug trailer came out--Benedict’s deep dragon voice had me nearly fainting, not going to lie) so I’ve not been idle! I have lots of ideas for upcoming chapters! Fingers crossed that I can translate them well to paper (er, or word document).  
> Some of this chapter feels a bit rushed and boring to me but I guess I can always go back and edit it if I feel the need. Also am unsure of how well I'm doing Benedict's POV and am somewhat regretting ever deciding to do his POV :D 
> 
> SOME ANNOUNCEMENTS of sorts:  
> *If anyone reading this fic is from England and you like the story enough to help me out, would you be willing to be the person I email or whatever for little bits and pieces of information about the country, school and stuff? :P I live in Australia so I obviously don’t have a clue about certain things. I’m really big on getting even the teeniest, little detail right (partly why it takes me forever to update, even when I’m on uni break and I don’t have the excuse of needing to study) so I would really appreciate it if someone would allow me to bother them once in a while with inane little questions like “what is summer like in England?” (i am 1000% sure your summers and ours are incredibly different, from things I’ve heard from friends who’ve been over there :D) and questions of that sort :D derp. My email is dominique.underwater@gmail.com  
> *Also related to my absolutely NEEDING to get details right, if anyone knows what the heck goes on with filming and stuff, and I get something wrong in my story PLEASE do tell me. at this point I am just floundering and guessing at certain things, and taking what little I know from behind the scenes stuff :D  
> *Thinking about adding chapter titles, what do you guys think? or do you not care? :P  
> *There are certain minor things about this story that I’m likely to go back and change. Such as adding dates when things are happening. Just a heads up if you care enough :D
> 
> No one really needs to answer any of these questions, of course :D And kudos to you if you read the mini essay above :D I am in a rambling mood tonight, so there you go.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading my silly little story and I hope you’ve enjoyed the chapter! Let me know what sorts of things I can improve on, as constructive criticism is always welcome.


	6. Chapter 6

Benedict’s eyes lit up with recognition, a smile forming on his face. Chloe couldn’t believe he was actually there—what were the chances?

“Chloe, what a surprise! I didn't know you worked here.” Benedict smiled, looking as genuinely surprised as she felt. There was a young woman standing next to him who didn’t look up, engrossed with typing something into the phone in her hand.

“Uh, yeah...” Chloe chuckled nervously. She thought about how she had admitted to him she found him attractive and distracting the very night before. She felt torn between feeling embarrassed and strangely proud of her newfound boldness.

“What are you doing in this area?” She blurted out the question before she could remind herself it wasn't her business. She glanced at the woman beside Benedict, wondering if they were together.

“Oh, I was just finishing up a day of filming and my personal assistant Emily and I were feeling peckish so we chose the closest café we could find before we go meet with some people.” He gestured to the woman, who was still typing something on her phone, not noticing she had been introduced. “I’ve barely had a chance to grab something to eat today because it’s been so busy.”

She paused, distracted by the idea that he was filming something close by, wondering what it might be. “I see...oh, sorry. I should be taking your order!” she laughed, feeling a little stupid. “What would you like today?” She tapped her fingers nervously on the counter. Finding herself in close proximity with Benedict always seemed to put her nerves on edge. She touched her hair absent-mindedly, realising some loose curls had escaped from the neat bun she had put her hair in that day. She wondered idly if she was beginning to look as bad as she did towards the end of a day of working. She grabbed the order notepad and poised a pen over it, ready to take down his order.

"Two cappuccinos please, and...” Benedict trailed off, looking at the selection of cakes and muffins and then the sandwiches in the fridge. He bit his lower lip lightly as he thought it over and Chloe couldn't help watching his mouth. Her stomach flipped as his eyes flicked up to meet hers, noticing she was watching, a slow smile beginning to form on his face. She averted her gaze, clearing her throat a little, wishing she could control the heat rising in her cheeks. She jotted down the order on the notepad, grateful for a bit of a distraction.

“A chocolate chip muffin and a ham, cheese and salad sandwich, please,” he said finally.

Chloe rung up the order and Benedict handed over some money. Their hands touched briefly as she took the cash and Chloe had to suppress the slight shiver that ran up her arm. She looked up at him and he had that particular look in his eyes again and she felt her cheeks grow hot yet again. She wished she knew how to control the blood flow to her face.

Suddenly she felt someone standing close behind her as they reached around her unnecessarily for the notepad, their arms trapping her where she stood, practically wrapping around her in a hug as they leaned against her gently. She realised it was Richard, as usual being his over-familiar self, except this time he had outdone himself. She looked over her shoulder up at him and made a face that basically said _What the fuck do you think you’re doing?_ but he was making a point to look busy studying her handwriting on the paper, stooping a little so his face was close to hers.

“Well, go on,” she prompted him impatiently, wondering what on earth he was doing. He grinned down at her before moving off to get the food. Chloe put the money in the register and she handed Benedict his change. When she looked up at him, she noticed him giving Richard an odd look. He gave Chloe a small, somewhat tight smile as he took his change and went to get a seat.

She wondered to herself what the odd look was about as she started on the coffees. Maybe she had imagined it. Or was reading too much into things. When the coffees were ready, she loaded the plates and cups onto a tray and took them out to the table Benedict and his assistant were sitting at. She expertly swerved to avoid a toddler zooming past on his little legs,  his mother chasing him and apologising to Chloe profusely.

Chloe approached the table, concentrating on not spilling the coffee, feeling Benedict’s gaze on her. She balanced the tray on the edge of their little table before placing the coffees in front of them. “Two cappuccinos, a muffin…?” Benedict motioned towards his busy personal assistant, who mumbled a thank you and smiled at Chloe kindly but briefly before turning her attention back to the phone in her hand. “And a ham sandwich.” She placed the plate in front of Benedict, her eyes meeting his.

“Thank you,” he said.

“You’re welcome, Mr. Cumberbatch,” she said, smiling, holding his gaze, feeling weirdly bold again. She turned and walked back to the counter. Before she disappeared back into the kitchen, she looked back at him and felt a giddy rush to see he had been watching her walk away, that look back in his eyes.

When she got back to the kitchen, she continued working, a stupid smile on her face.

A moment later Richard came ambling into the kitchen.

Chloe speared him with a glare, hand on her hip. “What was that about before?”

“What do you mean?” He blinked at her innocently.

Chloe rolled her eyes. “You practically grinding against me while I was serving a customer.”

Richard grinned. “It was just the way he was looking at you. Like he owned you or something.”

She felt too annoyed to ask what he even meant by that. “...And the way someone looks at me is a good reason to invade my space why?”

He shrugged.

Chloe shook her head and went back to work, wanting to smack him across his smug face. “You really just like messing with people, don’t you?” she muttered. She wondered suddenly if the weird look Benedict had given them was because of Richard doing his usual over familiar thing.

About twenty minutes later, Benedict and his assistant left. He stopped in the door to wave goodbye at her, his lips curling into a smile. As Chloe returned the wave, she wondered what was going to happen tomorrow at their little meeting.

* * *

Sunday dawned watery sunshine into Chloe's bedroom. Her alarm wasn't set to ring for another couple of hours but she was wide awake. She hadn't slept well, the prospect of meeting Benedict making her stomach roil, keeping her awake for most of the night. She rehearsed everything she might say to him, apologising for her inappropriate behaviour, why did he have to technically be her teacher, and why oh why did she have to find him so damn attractive and unattainable. She decided the last couple of things weren't things she should actually say, but they were still thoughts that tormented her. She had hoped her infatuation would ebb with time, but so far, she just felt increasingly attracted to the man.

She groaned, burying her head under a pillow, wishing she hadn't acted so weird and been so pushy with him. Not that it technically mattered, seeing as how she would only need to go to three more lectures before Brian came back from his trip. Then she wouldn’t have any more opportunities to embarrass herself. The thought made her feel equal parts relief and disappointment.

Finally she gave up and threw open the covers and got out of bed, frustrated that she couldn't get back to sleep. Now she had even more time to kill before she went to go meet with Benedict. She whiled away the time by cleaning, watching a bit of telly, reading...when it was time to get ready she did so with the queasy feeling in her stomach only intensifying. By the time she smoothed down the skirt of her dress and gave her reflection a last look over before she left, her nerves felt jangled, her belly a riot of fluttering butterflies. She reminded herself she wasn't going in there trying to impress him, just to apologise and act as normal as possible.

She looked at the directions again before she hollered at Alex that she was going out for a bit and left the flat after she heard Alex's muffled “Bye!” from the other girl's bedroom. Chloe hadn't actually told Alex anything about where she was going, despite the fact she would have been interested in hearing about it. She wasn’t entirely sure why she was keeping it from Alex, except maybe because she didn’t want Alex to get overly excited about nothing. 

She had decided she would bike over to where they were meeting. She rarely used her beat up car unless it was absolutely necessary, and the weather was rather nice that day, perfect for cycling. She had also thought ahead and had worn cute little shorts under her dress so she didn't flash anyone while she rode her bike over.

She found the place and hopped off her bike, chaining it to a lamp post, her hands trembling slightly as she snapped the lock in place. She breathed in deep and turned around to face the building. She approached the glass doors, feeling a little sick but she soldiered on and pushed open the door and went inside.

Chloe stopped a couple of steps inside and looked around, hoping she would spot him. Her gaze swept the café and a sudden movement above caught her eye. There was a second floor, which looked out over the whole café, and she could see Benedict waving to get her attention, his table tucked into a far corner.

She waved a little hello and moved towards the stairs, trying to discretely smooth down her somewhat windswept hair. Benedict was seated in a private little corner that still allowed a view of the first floor of the café. The sight of him made her heart somersault and plummet into her stomach and she was even more certain that this was going to be difficult. How on earth had she gotten so infatuated with this man?

When Benedict noticed Chloe, he smiled a warm smile and stood up. She approached the table, her eyes on Benedict as his eyes seemed to drink her in. _Just wishful thinking_ , she reminded herself, not wanting to get her own hopes up. After what felt like an eternity she reached the table, smiling at him despite her unsure feelings. She’d gotten a taste for seeing him and knew that was something that she needed to nip in the bud but for now she’d let herself enjoy seeing him in person.

“Hi,” she said a little timidly, feeling very shy all of a sudden under his gaze. His smile broadened.

“Chloe,” he said, her name sounding wonderful coming from him, as usual. “How are you?”

“I'm good. Yourself?” Benedict had come around the table to pull out her chair, a gentlemanly act she was not at all familiar with or used to and it made her smile. She seated herself and he gently pushed in her chair, his hand brushing her arm, pausing there for a heartbeat too long.

She placed her hands in her lap to try conceal the goosebumps that had arisen on her arms. She glanced down at them, amazed that his touch could make her react that way. She suddenly had a sinking feeling in her stomach, the one she always got when she knew she was getting too close, when someone threatened to breach the walls she’d carefully constructed around herself. Suddenly Chloe felt a little sick.

“I'm very well,” he said as he seated himself. He grinned. “I'm glad you could make it.”

“About that...” Chloe started, her eyes meeting Benedict’s, the colour in them a bright green in the light of that café. She regretted not just cancelling their plans now that she was here. A small part of her knew it was because she had selfishly wanted to see him in person again. But...seeing him in person was making her feel all kinds of things she wasn’t used to. She felt that old and familiar irrational fear now, even as his presence made her want to stay, pulling her to him. She fully came to the realisation that she really, actually wanted him, and not just physically. The fact that he didn’t want her back was no longer something she could convince herself was trivial and silly—it had somehow become something that really mattered to her.

 _What awful timing to realise all this._ Suddenly all she wanted to do was run out of there and forget all about him. “I only came here today to apologise for the emails and my flirting. It’s clear you’re not interested and I’m very sorry for continuously hounding you to go out with me.” By now she had already gotten up again. “I’m also really sorry to have put you through the trouble of coming to see me. I’ll leave you alone from now on, I promise."

Without another word, she turned and left the café hurriedly, feeling so stupid for wasting his time and even worse now for knowing what she’d been feeling was something stronger than lust. She had become properly infatuated with the man. _How could I have not realised this before now??_

She really should have just cancelled the plans earlier, it would have made things so much easier 

Chloe reached the glass doors and ran out past a couple about to enter the café. She gave them a hurried apology as she passed them. She got to her bike, unlocked the chain and got on as fast as she could and rode away from there, the breeze picking up her hair, the air cool against her warm cheeks. Benedict’s look of surprise when she left so quickly stayed in her mind’s eye all the way home.

* * *

Benedict watched Chloe rush out of there, her soft, loose curls bouncing against her shoulders in her haste to leave. He just sat there for a moment, feeling too surprised to do anything. 

_Go on, what are you doing? Go after her!_

He got up to rush after her, the younger woman so small and quick that by the time he’d reached the top of the stairs, he just caught a glimpse of her leaving the café, nearly bowling over a couple coming in. He took the stairs two at a time, not entirely sure why it felt so important to catch her before she was gone.

Once he’d gotten outside, it was too late. Benedict spotted Chloe riding away on a bike, already too far away to catch up. She turned the corner and was no longer in sight. You would think the hounds of hell and all manner of monsters were after her by how fast she was going. 

He stood there watching the direction she’d gone for a moment, completely perplexed as to what had just happened. One second she was there, completely lovely in one of her pretty dresses, light blonde hair framing her face in loose curls, those bright eyes blinking up at him. He could never seem to get over how short and tiny she was, sometimes feeling the urge to scoop her up in his arms, maybe kiss her like he had thought of doing since the moment he’d laid eyes on her.

And then the next moment she seemed like she couldn't get out of there fast enough. Benedict thought about what she had said, about leaving him alone, her eyes full of sincerity as she promised. Suddenly he felt so stupid for not stopping her there, interrupting her to say she wasn’t bothering him…and that he was interested, despite her insistence that he wasn’t.

He puffed out a breath as he turned and headed towards where his motorbike was parked, figuring there was no point going back into the café now. As he kicked the engine to life he toyed with the idea of texting her, remembering she’d given him her number. He shoved the idea from his mind. Perhaps this was for the best. Maybe she had realised she wasn’t interested in an older man like him after all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to post this chapter earlier than I was planning to, to make up for not updating very often (for those who care, haha) and because with exams just around the corner, I don't know whether I'll be able to update in the next few weeks. But I want to be able to update soon because there's good stuff coming up! I hope :D
> 
> Anyway, this is kind of a weird chapter, I know :D But hopefully you enjoyed it anyway! Thanks for reading :)


	7. Chapter 7

That afternoon Chloe decided to go for a run, needing to get out of the flat. She had felt restless after coming back from the café disaster and needed to use up some of her pent up energy. As she made her usual circuit, racing past trees and over the hills that made up the park, Chloe decided she really needed to get herself to forget about Benedict. Her feelings for the man were just growing and to what end? It was pointless to keep thinking about him. In a cowardly move, she decided she would ask Alex if she’d attend Benedict’s lectures for her. She made a mental note to ask her when she got back to their flat.

Chloe picked up her pace even more as if her feelings were something she could physically run from. Her breath puffed and she kept back a groan. If only things were that simple. If nothing else, flat out running for as long as possible would make her exhausted enough to go to bed later without going over the day’s events. Hopefully she’d be so tired she’d go to sleep instantly.

Nearly an hour later, Chloe got back, drenched in sweat, her cheeks and neck flushed.

Alex was on the couch when Chloe came in. She gave a whistle. “You always look so sexy when you get back from your run,” she teased good-naturedly.

Chloe made a face at her, knowing full well how she looked after a run. “I’ll happily come over there to give you a big hug and get my sweat aaall over you,” she threatened. Alex cringed, making Chloe laugh. She made her way into the kitchen to refill her water bottle, taking a long swig from it as she went over to the couch and sat down, careful not to rest against the cushions.

“Yep, just sit right next to me, you know how I love the smell of sweat,” Alex bitched, but Chloe had known her long enough to know she wasn’t being serious. Chloe poked her in the ribs.

“Hey, can I ask you for a little favour?” Chloe asked, aiming to make herself sound as indifferent as possible. 

Alex looked over at her suspiciously. “Sure…” 

“Do you mind going to the rest of Brian’s lectures for me until he gets back?” 

Chloe kept her eyes on the television.

“Why? I thought you liked going to them. What about Benedict?” she asked, the cool and indifferent act Chloe was putting on clearly not working on her. Alex was watching her profile, making Chloe feel like she was under a spotlight.

“Please? I just don’t want to go to a class so early on a Monday anymore...” Chloe faced Alex, pouting at her friend, hoping the feeble excuse would do for now. She had thought she wanted to tell Alex exactly what had happened but she really didn’t feel like spilling any of it yet.

Seeing the look of thinly veiled desperation on her face, Alex finally agreed, wondering what was going on with Chloe.

“But now I have to get up early and go to an early lecture on Monday,” Alex groaned.

“I’ll make you brownies! And waffles for breakfast to get you out of bed!”

“Yeah, yeah, okay. I’ll ignore the fact that getting up early enough to make me breakfast on Mondays means you’ll be up early enough to just go to the lecture yourself. Go get yourself a shower, Chloe.” Alex waved her away with her hand imperiously.

Chloe stuck her tongue out but got up, feeling like she could really do with a wash as well, happy that Alex wasn’t trying to pry information out of her. She decided on a bath, thinking some reading and a good soak in some warm water was exactly what she needed.

While Chloe soaked languidly in her hot bath, surrounded by fragrant bubbles, her text alert broke the silence of the bathroom. She put the book she was reading down carefully, and reached for her phone, where she’d placed it on a folded towel, safely out of reach of water splashes.

When she saw who it was she nearly dropped her phone in the bath. It was from Benedict.

_Hope you got home okay—B.C._

Chloe had forgotten that she’d given him her number the other night. What did it mean? Why was he texting her after how she had behaved? She pushed those thoughts away, reminding herself that she tended to overthink everything.

_Yes, thank you. I’m sorry about earlier today._

She waited tensely for a reply, wondering if he even would text back, but a moment later she got a new text.

_It’s alright._

Chloe put her phone back where it was and sat back in her bath. She blew her wet bangs out of her eyes, sighing. She remembered how handsome he looked that day, those eyes, the feeling of electricity she had felt when he had simply brushed his hand against her arm. She couldn’t help thinking about how great it would feel if he properly touched her. The warm water of her bath had made her skin pink and warm, capillaries expanding to allow blood to rush to her skin, making her feel slightly sensitive all over. She thought about what his mouth would feel like on hers, his hands roaming her body, her hands roaming over his body, his deep voice murmuring in her ear…

Chloe snapped herself out of it, shaking her head lightly. _Stop thinking about him_. She groaned to herself, finding it more difficult than she had anticipated to push the man from her thoughts.

* * *

The following week was spent shoving thoughts of Benedict far from her mind by studying, reading, going out for runs, working, just generally making sure she kept as busy as possible. She had always liked to think she was successful when it came to forgetting people when she needed to, feeling like it was a useful thing to have handy in her arsenal of weapons to keep her out of harm’s way. But in this instance, Benedict was like an itch she couldn’t reach or ever hope to ignore. She found her eyes glazing over in lectures sometimes, or when she was watching TV with Alex, thinking about what Benedict might be doing at that very moment.

Chloe fully realised how ridiculous her fixation and her dwelling on it was. It wasn’t like they had been dating or anything and he’d spurned her. She knew what it was like to have a crush on someone but this was getting so ridiculous, so beyond what that simple word encompassed.

As the end of the week approached, Alex was busy trying to convince Chloe why she needed to go out clubbing with their friends that night. Chloe suspected that her friend knew something was up with her and was making an effort to get her out of the flat. She finally caved, thinking perhaps a night out was what she might need. She had always felt clubs weren’t always the best place to socialise. Or rather, they were good for a certain _kind_ of socialising. Chloe tended to be more keen on being able to converse and hear what the person she was talking to was saying, and a club was not the best setting for conversation. But that night she was ready for mindless dancing and drinking.

And that was exactly what she did. Lights roved over the writhing bodies on the dance floor as Chloe slammed back her fourth shot. She made her way in to the crowd, alcohol buzzing through her veins pleasantly, making her feel bold and untouchable. She danced alone, with Alex, with whoever. But even though Chloe was enjoying herself, she kept thinking she saw Benedict’s face in the crowd, or in her peripheral vision. Every time she caught herself thinking about him, however absently, she felt annoyed with herself. _Behaving like a heartsick teenager,_ Chloe thought, feeling increasingly irritated that she was having so much trouble forgetting the man, that she had grown so weirdly obsessed.

Feeling determined to erase Benedict from her thoughts, she threw herself wholly into dancing, drinking and having fun with her friends. 

* * * 

By the next morning, Chloe was regretting her decision to give herself over to partying with complete abandon. She lay in her bed, nursing a hangover, the curtains still drawn to keep out any morning light. She glanced at her clock and groaned, thinking about the classes she had that morning.

She was debating the pros and cons of missing said classes when Alex bounded into her room, energetic as ever.

“Guess what?” 

Chloe looked towards the other girl, unable to believe how Alex looked as chipper as she did, considering she had had a lot more to drink than Chloe the night before. _Some people are just unnatural_ , she thought, studying Alex with groggy eyes. Then again, it could always be the fact that Chloe was a total lightweight and didn’t take to alcohol all that well. 

The other girl had crossed the room and plucked Chloe’s laptop from her desk. Alex bounced on to the bed next to Chloe, making her groan, her head aching.

“Oh, shush. You’ll like what I’m about to show you!” she trilled, settling herself in beside Chloe. She pushed herself up into a sitting position, groaning some more as she did so. She propped herself against some pillows as they waited for her computer to load. A couple of minutes later Alex had pulled up a number of websites, some of the pages featuring photos and some of them videos. Chloe realised she recognised a couple of the faces in the photos—especially the unmistakable face of Benedict Cumberbatch.

Alex passed over the laptop, letting Chloe scroll through the photos. “Star Trek Into Darkness premiered here yesterday,” Alex began explaining, although Chloe had already deduced as much from the headings of the pages. “There was also a press conference before that and you’ll find the videos here…” Alex pointed at the other tabs that she had opened for Chloe. There were also videos of short interviews snatched from the actors outside the premiere.

“Oh, and before I forget, your man is on Graham Norton tonight.” Alex smiled at Chloe knowingly. “Want to watch with me?

Chloe rolled her eyes. “He is not my man...but yes, I will.” _Despite the fact you’re meant to keep your mind off the man_ …She gave Alex a weird look. “I underestimated how much of a fangirl you are,” she said, chuckling. 

Alex shook her head. “I’m not really. I am a fan, yes. It’s just I’ve never seen you act this way over anyone—no, don’t deny it.” She interrupted as Chloe began to protest. “I’m not blind, Chloe. I have known you a few years now… I can see how hung up on him you are.” 

Chloe paused, deciding there was no use arguing. “And you want to torture me with photos and videos of him why?” 

Alex’s eyes narrowed. “Okay, seriously, _what_ is going on with you lately?”

Chloe sighed, knowing once Alex got started she wouldn’t back down. She never let anything go, especially if she thought her friend was in some sort of trouble. So she told her everything, the whole Sunday incident, her weird panicky feelings, all of it. When she was done, she looked at Alex only to find she was rolling her eyes. 

“What?” Chloe asked defensively.

“This is so typically _you_. You overthink the crap out of everything. So you’re developing feelings for someone! Some people might think of that as a good thing! But nooo, not doom and gloom Chloe!” 

“Hey!”

“No, just listen for a minute. Chloe, I care about you, you know that. And I’m telling you now, you need to quit shutting yourself away. This cowardly shit needs to stop. I’ve never commented on it but I know this isn’t the first time you’ve decided you’d rather keep your heart bubble wrapped and shut away from everything.” 

“But he’s not interested!” Chloe practically screeched to shut Alex up, the effort sending a knife of pain through her skull. She just wanted to take some ibuprofen and huddle under the covers. 

“Are you kidding me??” Alex pinched the bridge of her nose, looking more annoyed than Chloe had ever seen her. She took a deep breath. “Of course he’s interested! You think he would’ve made time on Sunday for just any random student of his? I’m  sure he’s a busy man who has better things to do on a Sunday than meet up with students over things that, if you think about it, could be resolved over a couple of emails.”

“I cornered him into that though,” Chloe said, still feeling guilty about that.

Alex rolled her eyes for the millionth time. “And I’m sure you cornered him into looking at you the way he did when I walked in on you guys the other week.”

“Huh?”

“Right after the lecture last week, you two were still talking. When I saw him, he definitely did not have the look of a man who was indifferent about the girl standing in front of him.”

Chloe stared at Alex, blinking like an owl. “Really?”

Alex’s expression softened. “Yes.”

Chloe’s eyes drifted back to her laptop screen, Benedict smiling at her out of a group photo of the cast of Star Trek, looking handsome in his suit and tie. She couldn’t bite back the stupid smile that spread across her face, or the weird feeling of hope blooming in her chest.

Alex gave Chloe a side hug, squeezing her. “I’m telling you this because I’d like you to be happy. And because you’re being a massive drama queen about this and I’d like it if you stopped. And maybe I’d like to see you have cute Benny babies.”

Chloe gasped, hitting Alex with a pillow. The other girl squealed and leapt off the bed and ran from the room, but not fast enough to dodge the pillow Chloe chucked at her.

Chloe knew Alex was being more rational than she was but wasn’t sure what to do about it at that moment. So she just went ahead and watched the videos and it was so easy to fall into listening to him speak, his wonderfully deep voice washing over her.

* * *

Monday morning rolled around and Chloe chickened out of going to Benedict’s lecture, despite realising she couldn’t keep running from her feelings, and knowing it was childish to avoid seeing him.

Alex was not very pleased that she had to go a second time, especially after “their talk”. 

“But you said yourself you enjoy his work,” Chloe said, blinking at her innocently. She was in Alex’s room, having just shaken her awake so she could go to Benedict's lecture. She was staring daggers at Chloe. 

Alex raised her eyebrow. “Yes, but maybe not so early on a Monday and perhaps not a drama theory lecture. You know I went out last night and didn’t get to bed until like, four,” she rolled over and groaned into her pillow.

“Yes...but I’ll do anything!”

“Talk to him, text him, do something so you’re not moping around anymore. I’ll go if you do that,” was Alex’s muffled reply.

Chloe bit her lip, worrying about the prospect of talking to Benedict. But she agreed that she would talk to Benedict and Alex grudgingly dragged herself from her bed, giving her the evil eye on the way to the bathroom, while Chloe drew hearts in the air and grinned innocently at her.

* * *

Chloe was sitting in the library on campus, a couple of books in front of her, unable to concentrate fully. She’d been there a couple of hours already and had apparently used up her concentration quota for the morning. Not to mention she had some other things on her mind.

It was Wednesday and Chloe still hadn’t worked up the nerve to talk to Benedict. She had no idea why she was being so cowardly or why she was massively procrastinating doing something she actually wanted to do. She just hadn’t figured out what to say yet. Everything she’d thought of so far had just seemed inadequate. Alex had tried reminding her, once again, that she was overthinking things, and that it was as simple as texting him about meeting up again. And yet, here she was, halfway through another week and she still hadn’t contacted him.

Deciding to finally take Alex up on her advice, she pulled her phone out of her bag. A simple _hello, how are you_ wouldn’t be so terrible a start. Chloe really didn’t want to keep putting this off. She was just about to compose the text, when her phone vibrated in her hand, a new text sitting in her inbox. Her heart kicked up a beat when she saw it was from Benedict. _Great minds think alike perhaps?_ she wondered to herself, biting her lip nervously.

_Hello, Miss Rowlands. Are you on campus?_

Chloe took a deep breath, remembering how Alex had told her not to overanalyse everything. She stared at the text, trying not to overthink why he might be texting her now.

Yes. Why do you ask? 

His reply came soon after.

_If you’re not busy, would you be able to meet me at my makeshift office right now?_

She didn’t have a class for another hour so she was free...and she felt curious about why he wanted to see her.

Sure. Just tell me what building and what room to meet you. 

Chloe felt a giddy rush of excitement at the prospect of seeing him in person again, competing with her still uncertain feelings about the whole thing. She tried to remember the last time she felt so conflicted about someone but came up empty.

Benedict texted her back not too long after, letting her know it was a room in the Arts building, so she packed away her things and made her way over there, wondering what he wanted, anticipation thrumming through her body.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a total non-chapter and it's slow going, I know and for that I should have the next chapter up by this weekend to make up for it! :D an interesting encounter is coming up, I promise!
> 
> Thank you for taking the time to read my fic even if it can't hold a candle to so many of the writers on this site. I really appreciate it.  
> And a million thank yous to those who wait so patiently for me to post new chapters and are so sweet and lovely ^-^
> 
> Comments and constructive criticism is always welcome, as usual! :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting this sooner than I intended!  
> The Empty Hearse promo photos have gotten me even more excited for the third series of Sherlock and I couldn't help myself sooo:
> 
>   
>   
> 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Chloe found the room easily enough and as she stopped in front of the door she tried to control the slight trembling in her hands from the rush of adrenaline coursing through her. She almost hated how strongly she reacted just at the prospect of seeing Benedict, feeling so weirdly out of control of her own body. But at the same time she knew it was just because she was unused to feeling this way, never used to relinquishing control. Along with that there seemed to be something so very different about Benedict.

_Okay, enough of the creepy lurking outside his door, knock already!_

Chloe knocked on the door tentatively.

“Come in,” Benedict answered, his voice muffled by the door.

She opened the door and peeked inside, feeling her belly erupt with butterflies as she spotted him seated at the far end of the large table in the room. He had a look of concentration on his face, a little crease between his brows where they knitted together slightly. He looked up from what he was typing on his laptop computer and smiled when he saw her, transforming his face, warmth in those bright eyes. 

Seeing him in the flesh confirmed her feelings had not ebbed one bit in the time they hadn’t seen each other.

“Please, come in,” he said again, getting up from his seat.

Chloe gave him a little smile and stepped into the room, shutting the door quietly behind her. Her gaze swept the room, doing anything to avoid his eyes. She still felt embarrassed for running out on him the other week. She also had no clue why he’d asked her to come see him. So instead of meeting his eyes like a normal human being would, she focused on the room, noticing it was a conference room, the large table allowing a dozen or so people to sit around it if need be. Late morning light slanted through the windows, the only light illuminating the gloom, catching some dust motes as they swirled and danced in the light.

“I didn’t think they gave guest lecturers rooms to work in,” she said idly, saying the first thing that came to mind. Once she had said it she could have kicked herself. A proper greeting and a _how are you_ would probably have been more polite but as usual, she seemed to forget how to behave normally around Benedict.

Benedict chuckled. “They just let me use this room if there’s anything I need to work on while on campus. This room barely gets used so Joanne figures it’s alright for me to use.”

He had come around the table and perched himself on the edge, his arms crossed lightly. He had a neat shirt on today, his shirt sleeves rolled up to the elbows, showing off his strong forearms and his big hands. She had always had a little weakness for well defined arms and attractive wrists and hands, and the way he was wearing his shirt showed all this off perfectly. His hair was its usual wavy mess, just begging to be touched and there was a playful smile on his lips. Chloe was once again struck by how attractive she found him.

 _Well at least he doesn’t seem angry with me._ She looked away quickly, realising anew that his opinion of her had really become something that mattered to her.

His gaze did not falter and remained on her, studying her, even as her own gaze kept sweeping the room. Being closed into a small space with him was quite distracting and she half regretted shutting the door behind her earlier. That odd feeling of tension and electricity was there, almost palpable, and it didn’t help that he looked way too yummy sitting there all casually. In that moment she wanted nothing more than to cross the few steps and throw herself at him.

“How are you?” Benedict asked, breaking the silence with that wonderfully deep voice of his.

“I’m okay.” She met his eyes. “Yourself?”

“I’m good.” He smiled. “Perhaps you’re wondering why I asked you to come see me,” he said.

“Yes, actually...I’m really sorry again about that Sunday…” she trailed off, her hands twisting together nervously.

“It’s alright, really. No need to keep apologising for it,” he said, chuckling.

She nodded, but inside she didn’t feel so sure. Now that he was talking, the combination of his voice and those eyes on her seemed to anchor her to the spot, unable to tear her gaze from his own. She cleared her throat lightly. “So...what did you ask me here for?”

He paused a moment, tapping his bottom lip in thought with one of his long fingers. Finally he said, “About what you said that Sunday...you said you’d leave me alone.” He rose from his casual position and stood up straight, watching her. “I’d rather you didn’t. Or if you do, I can’t make any promises about leaving you alone. Not anymore.” He had slowly started moving towards her, closing the space between them until he stood right before her.

Chloe blinked up at him, wondering if he had really just said that. There was that smouldering, dark look in his eyes again and it sent a thrill of anticipation through her body. Looking up into that face, half cast in shadow, it made him seem even more enticing and mysterious to her. Under some delicious, light cologne she could smell his own special scent, the one she hadn’t realised she was missing until now. She breathed it in subtly, feeling a little dizzy. She noticed that he was moving ever closer, beginning to lean his face closer to hers.

“Unless, of course…” he murmured, his voice deliciously low. “You’d prefer I left you alone?” He watched her eyes, as if assessing her reaction, ready to pull back at the slightest suggestion. When she didn’t move or say anything to object, he seemed satisfied and his gaze flicked down to her lips. She wondered if she was even breathing.

Their lips had almost met when suddenly her mobile phone rang, tearing through the silence, startling them both. Chloe’s gaze dropped to her bag, her traitorous ringing phone inside it. She’d forgotten she had turned the ringer back on after leaving the library. When she looked back at Benedict, the moment they’d had was gone entirely, and he was staring down at the floor, rubbing the back of his neck.

After a moment Benedict met her eyes, soft amusement in his own. “Well, are you going to get that?”

Chloe nodded absently. She dug through her bag, wondering who it was that she owed a swift kick to the shin. She found the phone and saw it was Brian’s number calling. She kept back a laboured sigh, wondering what on earth he could want from her all the way in India.

“Yes?” she said, sounding annoyed.

“Well hello to you too, sunshine. Are you at uni?”

“Yup…” she replied shortly.

“Damn. I need someone to pick me up from the airport.”

“You’re back already?" 

“Yeah, cut my trip short, only just realised I have my one exam really soon.”

Chloe rolled her eyes. Typical Brian. “Well, Alex might be able to give you a lift. Or you could always take a cab.” She sort of regretted her clipped tone but she really wanted this conversation to end. Talk about bad timing. Brian would forgive her later.

“I’d rather not have to pay for my ride, thanks. I’ll try calling Alex or someone. Bye, Miss Grumpy.” He cut off the call and Chloe lowered her phone, chucking it back into her bag, which she then dropped in one of the spare chairs that had been piled near the door.

She turned back to Benedict, who had taken up his spot against the table again.

“Sorry about that...that was just Brian calling to tell me he’s back early. That’s the friend I’ve been taking your lectures for,” she added, in case he’d forgotten. “So I guess I won’t have to go to his drama lectures anymore,” she said lightly. Not that she’d gone the past two weeks. Her voice was lighthearted but she felt a twinge of disappointment, thinking that she wouldn’t really have any excuse to see Benedict now.

“Oh,” he looked somewhat disappointed himself, or perhaps she was imagining it. He was watching her intently again and she felt another wave of self-consciousness under his gaze. She felt like she didn’t recognise him at all, the serious and intense expression on his face seemingly reserved for her.

Suddenly Benedict crossed the room, closing the small space between them quicker than her brain seemed to follow. He enfolded her in his arms, pulling her body against his. She let out a small gasp, surprised at the sudden contact, as he brought his mouth down against hers gently. She almost instantly gave in, kissing him back. Her arms snaked up to encircle his neck, pulling him even closer, needing to go on tip toe. They kissed somewhat gently at first, before control seemed to flee, and they kissed more fervently. Chloe felt utterly light-headed, her body on fire wherever he touched her. She couldn’t believe how good it felt to be kissing him, his scent surrounding her, their bodies fitting together seamlessly.

Benedict smiled into the kiss, and gently pulled her in the direction of the table. His arms snaked down her back, his hands roaming freely as if he couldn’t get enough, before cupping her bum, gently squeezing. He lifted her easily, her legs opening to wrap around his waist, and he settled her on top of the table. He pushed himself even closer to her between her legs, kissing her ravenously. She felt his length straining against his trousers as he pushed against her, grinding into her, sending a thrill of pleasure through her.

His hands were resting on her knees and he began running them up her thighs, pushing up her skirt, skimming over her stockings. When his fingers brushed against the little suspenders of her garter belt, he groaned a little against her mouth. He broke the kiss to look down, almost as if to see what he was touching and when his eyes returned to Chloe’s, they were dark with lust. He looked almost predatory and it sent a rush of excitement through her.

“Do you always wear these?” his voice low.

She looked down to see him tugging on the garter belt, the sight of his hand on her thigh unbelievably exciting. She nodded, meeting his eyes, the look in them sending pleasure straight to her groin, feeling the keen ache between her legs. “Usually,” she said, her voice sounding small and breathless.

He practically growled as his mouth crashed down against hers again. His hand was moving up, excruciatingly slow and it was just as his fingertips brushed her panties that there came a knock from the door.

They both froze, panting slightly.

The knock came again.

“Ben? It’s Joanne, may I come in?”

Benedict instantly broke contact with Chloe, straightening her skirt before backing away and taking his seat again. He tucked his chair in, hiding his very obvious boner from view. His lips were slightly swollen and his cheeks were a little flushed. He dragged a hand through his hair, seemingly trying to gain some semblance of composure. Seeing the effect she had had on him made Chloe feel weirdly proud and even a little turned on, practically unable to stop herself from staring. But she pulled her gaze away quickly as she too took a seat, straightening her clothes and smoothing her hair. She knew her cheeks were pink but there was really nothing she could do about that at that moment. She focused on trying to make her breaths more even.

“Yes, come on in,” Benedict said, after glancing at Chloe to make sure she was alright. She nodded, feeling her mouth twitch in a little playful smile, her heart still racing. His eyes lingered on her mouth for a moment.

Joanne let herself in and her gaze fell on the two of them. Chloe hoped it wasn’t incredibly obvious that they had just been heavily making out but she figured Joanne would have reacted accordingly if the scene before her had seemed strange. She smiled kindly at Chloe but otherwise didn’t pay much more attention to her.

“Benedict, I hope your notes for the last lecture are ready? Since you won’t be here next week I really do need to make sure I know what you’ve covered so far.”

Chloe wondered why he wouldn’t be here and gave Benedict a puzzled look which he seemed to notice but he quickly turned his attention back to Joanne. 

“Of course, they’re right here,” he waved a hand to his laptop. “I was just finishing them up and was about to print them out for you.”

“It might be easier to just email them to me, Ben,” Joanne said, chuckling.

Benedict laughed and agreed. Chloe couldn’t help staring at him, loving the sound of his laugh. As he busied himself emailing the document to Joanne, he said, “Thanks again for the little extension for these notes, Jo. I would’ve gotten them to you sooner but my schedule has been a little hectic lately.”

“I understand, Ben, don’t worry,” Joanne reassured him as she peered over his shoulder at his laptop screen. “All done?” Joanne asked as she headed back towards the door. “I have a meeting in five minutes all across the campus and it looks like I’m likely to be late. I’ll see you later.” She smiled at them both and waved before leaving, shutting the door behind her. They were alone again.

Benedict blew out a breath. “That was close,” he said lightly, trying to inject a bit of humour into the room.

Chloe met his eyes and laughed, her lips still tingling where his lips had pressed against them hungrily. “Yeah.” She felt quite shy again all of a sudden, thinking of how they seemed to have lost control of themselves only moments ago.

As if sensing what she was thinking about he made his way around the table again and stood before her, keeping a bit of distance between them. She looked up at him questioningly and she saw all manner of emotions crossing his face as he gazed down at her. She saw something like regret in his eyes and her heart felt like it might plummet. Did he wish he hadn’t kissed her? Maybe he thought it had been a mistake. But then, what about the stuff he had been saying earlier, about not wanting to leave her alone?

Finally Benedict broke the silence. “I’m sorry, Chloe.”

Disappointment gripped her and she let her gaze drop to her hands in her lap. She didn’t want to see the regret in his eyes anymore, didn’t really want to hear him reject her. She wondered if she was just jumping to conclusions, but it almost sounded like he might be working up to a big one.

“For what?” she asked.

He knelt in front of her, as if seeking her eye contact. Their gazes locked and Chloe felt herself pulled in.

“I’m sorry I nearly jumped you,” he laughed nervously. “It’s not normally the way I behave, I promise.”

She wasn’t sure what to say, but she managed a small smile. It still sounded like he might be about to dismiss her.

Benedict ducked his head, breaking their eye contact. “I’m not going to be in the country for the next few days,” he said finally.

Chloe found she could no longer hold her tongue. “And I suppose you can’t get into anything new when you’re about to leave?” she asked.

His gaze flew up to meet hers at the tone of her voice, and she was surprised to see concern in his eyes. “That’s not what I…” he started then sighed. “Well that’s sort of what I mean, yes.”

Chloe got up to go weave around him to pick up her bag, not wanting to stick around any longer but she didn’t make it past him. Benedict caught her arm and kept a gentle but firm grasp on her. 

“Wait a second.”

She looked up at him, almost helpless with him touching her. He looked like he was weighing his words carefully.

* * *

Benedict looked down into those big eyes, seeing Chloe about to close him off from her again. It was making him feel frantic to explain himself. Maybe it was the kiss that had thrown him off or being near her in such close proximity, but he wasn't wording himself the way he wanted to. He didn’t want to let her go running away again without trying to get her to hear him out.

Finally he said, “I just mean this wasn’t how I was going to do things today.” That was a complete understatement. He hadn’t meant to practically jump her like he had. He couldn’t explain what had taken hold of him or why he seemed to have lost control of his senses for that moment, but what he did know was that they had some seriously heady chemistry between them. He had just felt a primal urge to take what he wanted, to stop denying how much he wanted her.

But what a kiss it was. He didn’t regret it so much as he regretted the way he had conducted himself. The last thing he wanted was to scare her away. Chloe had seemed willing enough though, remembering how she seemed to open up beneath his kisses and his hands, molding against his body easily, feeling and tasting sweeter than he’d ever imagined. The thought bolstered him and made him feel a bit more sure that he was making the right decision today.

Chloe remained there, gazing at him questioningly. When he felt confident she wasn’t going to do a runner again he let her go, if reluctantly so.

“In my very clumsy way, I just want to ask if I can see you. I mean, in a non-teacher-student capacity.” God he was beginning to make a total arse of himself, words tumbling one over the other.

Chloe’s eyes narrowed slightly, looking unsure. “So…are you saying you’d like to go on a date with me?”

That was a much less clumsy way of saying it but all he said was, “Yes, exactly.”

She smiled a little and suddenly turned coy, peering up at him through her lashes.

Looking at him like that, adorable and mischievous at the same time, made him want to crush her to him again and lavish her with fervent kisses. Maybe make use of the table...he shoved the thoughts from his mind for the moment.

“Didn’t you have an issue with our age difference, Mr. Cumberbatch?”

He thought about the question. His main issue with her age was that he had thought he would feel like a seedy old man chasing the skirt of a girl much younger than him. He realised that that wasn’t at all how he felt, now that he was actually trying to win her over. It didn't feel wrong, like he had thought it would. There were of course other factors to consider, such as how the outside world would see this and even those closest to him. But at this point in time all he felt like doing was indulging in something he wanted very badly. For once he felt himself wanting to make a decision that didn’t have to revolve around worrying what others thought. In a way it was irresponsible, but he found himself not caring. He wasn’t even sure how far this would actually go, how much of his luck he could push. He only knew he wanted Chloe and that this felt right.

“I thought I’d have a problem with your age at first,” he said finally. “But I don’t.”

Something glimmered in her eyes, a stormy grey in the gloomy light of the room. Was she glad? Indifferent? But finally she smiled at him, a genuine happy smile and he felt his chest tighten slightly at the sight. He wondered about that but ignored it for the moment.

“What about you leaving the country? Where are you going anyway?” she asked. 

“I’m flying out to America tomorrow for some interviews, auditions, things like that,” he answered. “I’ll be gone a few days, like I said.” 

Benedict thought he saw a little disappointment in her eyes but wasn’t sure because she smiled a second later, concealing whatever it was he had seen.

“That sounds like fun,” she said brightly. “I hope the auditions and interviews go well for you.” 

“Me too,” he laughed. “Sometimes these sorts of interviews become a little same-ish,” he admitted.

Chloe chuckled, her little laugh adorable. “Yeah, I can imagine.” She glanced down at her watch suddenly and her eyes widened.

“Oh fuck,” she said. Then her eyes flew up to his face, her cheeks becoming a little pink. “I mean, sorry.”

He laughed, amused that she was embarrassed about something as small as swearing in front of him. He also hadn’t expected that sweet little mouth to use bad language for some reason. “Don’t worry, Chloe. I’m no stranger to swearing.” 

She’d begun to go a deeper shade of pink and he stifled back another laugh, not wanting to embarrass her further. While he thought it was so endearing the way she was so quick to blush, he wanted nothing more than to make her feel at ease. He felt the urge to hug her to his chest and kiss her burning cheeks but instead he asked, “What’s wrong?” He gestured to her watch.

Chloe smiled apologetically. “I’m running a little late for a class. I need to go.”

Benedict nodded, feeling slightly disappointed. He knew he needed to leave soon as well. They were shooting more Sherlock that afternoon and he still needed to pack for his trip the next morning. Emily, his personal assistant, kept reminding him to do it but as usual he kept leaving it. He was probably doomed to forever be a last minute packer.

Knowing this was likely the last chance he got before he left for America, he stepped forward and planted a chaste kiss on Chloe’s lips. It was so different to how they had kissed earlier and he held back the urge to pull her roughly to him again, have her mouth open under his easily, her little gasp still in his head. What was the matter with him? It was like being a teenager all over again. 

Chloe smiled at him, stepping towards the door, her eyes still locked with his, oblivious to the thoughts running through his head. “Have a safe flight, Benedict,” she said as she stood in the doorway, before she stepped through and shut the door quietly behind her. 

Benedict let a sigh escape his lips he hadn’t known he had been holding.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for everyone's support of this fic ^-^ It means a lot a lot to me.


	9. Chapter 9

Chloe spent the rest of the day in a daze, moving through her lectures and tutorial classes like an automaton. She kept biting back little grins as she remembered Benedict’s mouth on hers, their bodies pressed close, his hands on her. She felt sorry for those who ended up in discussion groups with her that day because she may as well have been absent with how little she was contributing. She really kept trying to pull herself together and focus, but she was finding it difficult to forget his touch. He was managing to distract her even when he wasn’t there! It was a good thing this week was the last week of the teaching period so all they were covering was a summary of the semester’s work.

Finally when her last class of the day finished up she went home, her spirits still high.

Chloe made her way into the apartment and chucked her keys on to the little table by the door. She practically floated through the flat, pausing to touch the flowers she had placed on the dining table a day ago, the delicate baby’s-breath soft beneath her fingertips. It reminded her of the way it felt to wrap her arms around Benedict’s neck as they kissed, her fingertips brushing his soft, wavy hair. She even found herself humming contentedly. She passed Alex’s room, where she was sitting on her bed, watching videos on her laptop. She caught sight of Chloe and noticed her humming, her face dreamy and serene. She rolled off her bed, eyes narrowed in suspicion.

Chloe had just dropped her bag by her desk and had thrown herself on to her bed, when Alex poked her head into the room. 

“Well, you look happy,” Alex said, by way of greeting, chuckling. She came in to sit next to Chloe. “What’s happened?”

Chloe grinned, knowing Alex was going to freak out for many different reasons once she heard what she had to say. She sat up and opened her mouth to reply but before she could start, Brian peeked around the doorway into the room.

“Brian! You’re home!” She had almost completely forgotten about the phone call earlier, the kiss wiping out the memory. She went over and gave him a tight hug, having to go on tip toe as Brian stood about a foot and three inches taller than her. It wasn’t hard being taller than her but standing at six foot three, Brian may as well have been a giant. 

“Hey there, Miss Grumpy,” Brian said wryly, but he still returned the hug. Brian and Chloe had been friends since they were nine years old and therefore he was one of her oldest friends. He had been there when her parents had divorced, when she had gone through her weird rebellious, typical “acting out” stage and she had known him before he became seriously attractive. When they were kids he had been chubby but at about the age of seventeen he’d grown over a foot and got into exercise and the weight just redistributed itself. Brian’s chubby features gave way to a sleek jawline and prominent cheekbones and now girls fell over themselves to get near him, something he still wasn’t used to but obviously had no complaints about.

He pulled away from her hug, his facial expression basically saying “unimpressed friend is still unimpressed with your behaviour”.

Chloe cringed a little. “Sorry Bry. I know I was a bitch on the phone. But you called at a bad time!” She hugged him again. “I’ll make you red velvet cupcakes later, your favourite!”

Brian made a show of thinking about it hard but he shrugged and grudgingly accepted. “You owe me the cab fare as well though,” he said, looking at her innocently.

“I do not! I’m not your personal driver. It’s not my fault you’re so stingy with money!”

“Let’s celebrate you coming home!” Alex cried, interrupting them both, bounding away towards the kitchen. 

Brian and Chloe exchanged amused looks but followed. Alex had already popped open a bottle of wine when they joined her in the kitchen and was pouring some into three glasses.

Alex raised her glass. “Here’s to having our annoying flatmate back!” Both she and Chloe drank to the toast eagerly, making Brian exclaim loudly, “Hey!”

Chloe hugged Brian from the side and reached up to ruffle his hair. “Oh don’t be such a baby, Bry!” she said cheerily. “Now, tell us all about India! I’ve noticed you’ve even caught some sun. I’m surprised you tanned at all, normally you go as pink as a lobster in the sun,” she poked fun at him. 

“Yes, ha ha, Chloe, you bitter creature. Have the people from the Hobbit called asking for their stunt double hobbit yet?” Brian quickly ducked out of the room before Chloe could kick him in the leg, while she screeched about not being short enough to be a hobbit, calling him a giant dickhead. Alex just chuckled and rolled her eyes, following them. It looked like things were going to get more “normal” around the flat now that Brian was home. 

Once they finally settled down they sat in the living room and Brian told them about his adventures in India. He and a friend of his had taken motorcycles around a couple of the cities, exploring. He described some wonderful beaches, temples and lush forests. Brian showed them some pictures he took of the landscape and they _oohed_ and _aahed_. The room darkened gradually as late afternoon light sent shadows stretching across the living room.

By the time Brian was done telling them about some of the stuff he saw and what he got up to, the sun had set outside and they were seriously hungry. In an unspoken agreement they ordered in pizza, Brian taking charge of ordering their meal online, getting up to grab his laptop to do so. 

While Brian was ordering the food, Alex suddenly spoke up. “Oh, Chloe! What were you going to say earlier?”

“What do you mean?” But even as she said it she remembered why she was still feeling so happy. Of course it was great having Brian back home but that had been the icing on the cake, really. Suddenly she remembered Benedict’s lips on hers, the sight of his big, manly hands on her thighs and she shivered slightly.

“When you came home you actually looked cheerful and you never look that happy after Wednesday. You have that weird Justice and Social Policy tutorial on Wednesdays and you always find something to complain about that class. So…? Does this have something to do with Benedict?” Alex gave her a sly smile and wiggled her eyebrows. 

Gosh, was Chloe that predictable? Even so, at the mention of Benedict’s name Chloe’s face split into the goofiest grin. Brian, who was sitting with his computer in his lap tapping away at the keys, raised his eyebrows at them.

“Who’s Benedict?” Brian asked.

Ignoring him, Alex gasped at the sight of Chloe’s grin. “Something happened! Did you talk to him?” 

“Yes, I guess you could say that,” Chloe was still grinning, even twirling a lock of hair around her finger, a little blush creeping into her cheeks. 

Brian set aside his laptop. “Who are we talking about?” 

“Well what did you guys talk about that’s got you grinning like that?” Alex poked Chloe in the ribs impatiently. “Spill!” 

“Well…” Chloe paused for dramatic effect. “We may have sort of...kind of...made out?” 

The effect was instantaneous. Alex squealed and launched into a side hug that toppled them both off the couch while Brian simply sat there looking even more confused. “Who are we talking about??” he repeated loudly, trying to be heard over Alex’s repeated cries of “WHAT, HOW, WHEN, WHY, OH MY GOD, EXPLAIN!”

Chloe was choking on her laughter, pinned on the carpet by Alex’s flailing body. She loved it when she managed to shock Alex, it never failed to amuse her. 

“Get off me and I’ll explain,” Chloe gasped. She was also beginning to pity Brian who hated to be left out of the loop, hence all the shouting. 

Alex scrambled up and pulled Chloe back on to the couch, even smoothing her hair and briskly brushing imagined dust off her shoulders and back. Then she sat back, folding her hands in her lap, the perfect image of an attentive friend, but the look in her eyes suggested she was not going to remain patient for long. She closed her eyes briefly, took a calming breath and said, “Explain. Everything.”

So Chloe wasted no time and launched into explaining what had happened that morning, leaving very little out, knowing when Alex said “everything” she meant _everything_. When she got up to the bit where Benedict had ground his hips against her the doorbell rang and Brian was only too happy to jump up and get it. He came back with their pizza and was happy that Chloe had finished with that particular part of the story. Brian had always acted and felt like a big brother to her (nevermind that she already had two older brothers) and stories about dry humping was stuff he didn’t need to hear.

When she finished Alex simply sat there and stared at her, her slice of pizza lying forgotten on a plate in her lap.

“You are so lucky. You lucky cow,” she said, shaking her head. “I mean, I know I was pushing you in this direction but still.” 

“So is anyone going to tell me who this Benedict is?” Brain interrupted, attempting to sound indifferent. “I mean you just described how some guy nearly fucked you on a table at uni and then you nearly get caught and you seem to be content to just leave me in the dark about who he is.” He studied his nails, an air of nonchalance about him. “I mean I know it’s just me, Brian, your oldest friend, but you know.”

“Oh Brian, I’m sorry,” Chloe bit back a laugh.

“I’ve been getting a lot of that from you today! The number of red velvet cupcakes you’ll need to bake to make up for this is increasing.”

Alex rolled her eyes. “She’s talking about Benedict Cumberbatch, you tool! And don’t scold Chloe for getting some action just because you haven’t been getting it on with anyone!” She scooted closer to Chloe and put an arm around her shoulder protectively.

“Actually, for your information, I met a very liberal minded German girl while in India and honestly I didn’t think anyone could be that flexible—”

“Alright, alright!” Chloe interrupted, throwing her hands up, not really wanting to hear about this limber woman and what sort of things they had got up to together. In the same way that Brian thought of her as a little sister, she thought of him as a big brother and honestly, explicit details about his sex life was something she could live without. Alex also began to look distinctly uncomfortable, thought she tried her best to hide it. Chloe stared at her but Alex smiled a small tight smile and she decided to just leave it for the time being.

Then Brian perked up, dropping any pretense of indifference, saying, “Hold on, Benedict Cumberbatch? _The_ Benedict Cumberbatch? _Sherlock_ Cumberbatch?” 

“How many other Benedict Cumberbatches do you know of? Yes, she means _the_ Benedict.” 

Brian stared at Chloe open-mouthed. “How...what…?” 

Chloe shot him a puzzled look. “You mean you didn’t know he was going to be a guest lecturer for your class? The one I was taking for you?” 

Brian stroked the stubble on his chin, thinking. “Well, maybe my lecturer mentioned it but I was probably zoned out…that still doesn’t explain how you ended up making out with him. Pretty sure all I asked you to do was attend the lectures for me, Clo, not seduce the teaching staff,” he mock scolded, wagging his finger at her. “And aren’t you like, half his age?” He raised an eyebrow at her.

Chloe rolled her eyes. “No! Not quite...he’s sixteen years older. And we just...hit it off,” she finished feebly.

 

“Okay, we’ll start from the beginning, and you can explain how you managed to nearly shag Sherlock,” Brian said, nodding. Sherlock was one of his favourite programs, and while he wasn’t crazy specifically about Benedict, he still enjoyed the show quite a bit and as an aspiring actor, Brian admired his skills. “Actually, is that why you sounded so annoyed on the phone? Had I interrupted your makeout session or something?”

Chloe blushed furiously for the millionth time that day and nodded.

“Yuck.”

*  *  *

“You know, Clo, this sounds so much like the sort of stuff you used to get up to in school,” Brian mused, after hearing the whole story.

Alex looked puzzled and narrowed her eyes at Brian, not following what he meant.

Chloe frowned at him, basically telling him to shut up while Alex just looked between the two looking confused. Chloe did _not_ talk about her wild and unruly days, when she was young(er) and foolish and she wasn’t about to start today. She didn’t think it was important enough to mention to anyone who didn’t know her back then, mainly because she was embarrassed and ashamed about those couple of years.

Seeing the look on Chloe’s face, Brian steered the conversation away from dangerous waters, acting like he hadn’t mentioned anything. Alex looked like she wanted to interrupt and steer the conversation back to whatever Brian had begun to say but she seemed to decide that this wasn’t the time and for that Chloe was grateful.

“But he famously wants a family doesn’t he?” Brian asked.

Chloe steeled herself, knowing Brian was about to leap to a million conclusions. Honestly, he was worse than Chloe most of the time.

“I mean how would this even work?” He continued. “Do you really want children so soon? You haven’t even finished uni yet! And didn’t you say you wanted to do your masters degree? How will you do that when you’re round with the child of Cucumberbum?”

Alex groaned at the name Brian used, squeezing the bridge of her nose while Chloe spluttered, not knowing what to address first.

“Hold on! Seriously, back the fuck up!” Chloe exclaimed. “We’re not having children! We aren’t even really going out! And seriously, _Cucumberbum_?”

Brian ignored her, powering on. “Well, he is famously known for wanting kids right? Cabbagepatch might have certain expectations of you. Like putting those hips to some good ol’ birthing.” Brian nodded knowingly. One minute Benedict was the guy who played one of his favourite television characters, the next he was fair game to have his name made fun of now that he was going after Chloe.

Chloe snorted with laughter despite herself. “Stop making fun of his name, you dickbag.” Still, she hadn’t considered the whole children thing. She recalled reading somewhere about his desire to start a family but she hadn’t thought about how it might apply to her. But then again she hadn’t had a reason to think of what it meant to her. She also hadn’t ever really thought of whether she even wanted children herself.

“Okay, enough of all this weird speculation! We just made out, that is all. We might be going on a date or something when he gets back from America, but seriously, stop mentioning babies! And stop making fun of his name,” she jabbed a finger in Brian’s chest. “You’re reading way too much into nothing.”

Even so she felt a little unsettled, Brian’s outlandish musings bringing to light some concerns she hadn’t even considered. What if he wanted more from her than she could give? What if it got to the point where it got serious enough that they started discussing these questions? Would he be willing to wait for her? Or would he think she was too young to be taken seriously?

As if sensing the direction of Chloe’s brooding thoughts, Alex shook her gently.

“Remember, don’t overthink this.” She shot Brian a glare. “Stop. Scaring. Her. She already over analyses everything without your help.”

Brian shrugged. “I’m just here to ask the important questions. And to make sure Chloe doesn’t go stumbling into trouble.”

“I think I’m just going to go to bed,” Chloe said, suddenly feeling very weary.

But long after she had shut off her lights, she still lay awake in the dark thinking about all the things Brian pointed out. Suddenly the whole age thing mattered...or more like she realised it could potentially be a problem down the track.

She groaned, rolling onto her other side for the millionth time. The numbers of her alarm clock glowed brightly, catching her eye. She groaned again, realising it was two in the morning. She had classes to go to in a few hours and it didn’t look like she was going to get much sleep at this rate.

Chloe was just fluffing up her pillow to try to get more comfortable and attempt to sleep once more when her phone went off, the text alert sounding. She frowned, wondering who it could be. She fumbled in the darkness for it, knocking a book off her bedside table in the process, but her fingers finally closed around the phone.

She saw the text was from Benedict and her stomach instantly turned to jelly.

_Hi, sorry if I’ve woken you up. Just sitting around, waiting to board my plane. Thinking about you.  x_

Despite all her worrying, the words made her grin. And the little kiss! He was being so sweet.

She was about to reply when he sent another text, her phone vibrating in her hand.

_I was also wondering if you have Skype?_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone for the support and kudos and everything ^-^ and thank you for reading this chapter, I know it was another kind of slow one, and Ben was mostly absent :D some (hopefully) cute skype video calls coming up ^-^
> 
> As usual comments and critiques and whatnot are most welcome :) as an ongoing fic, it's still a work in improvement so any help is appreciated.
> 
> Some notes:  
> *I may be going back over time and re-writing some of the chapters, just so it all flows together a bit better and so the writing is a bit more uniform, just so you all know! But I doubt anything drastic will happen and if anything does I'll be sure to let you all know somehow.  
> *Super duper thanks to all my regular readers who never fail to comment, message etc and encourage me to keep going ^-^ <3


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Chloe and Benedict have their first little Skype date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been anxious to get a new chapter up so here it is! I really am sorry for the delay. Check the end notes for my offering and a link to a silly little playlist I created for this fic :D

Chloe read Benedict’s text again, thinking what a great idea it would be to be able to video call him, be able to see him even while he was across the ocean, miles and miles away. Her worries about “Benny babies” melted from her mind as she began to compose a reply, but another text came in almost immediately.

_And sorry again if I’ve woken you up._

Then another.

_Oh wait, shit. Sorry. I’ll stop texting you now._

Chloe laughed, amused by this side of Benedict. She never thought that she’d be able to get to know any different side to the man, never daring to believe she’d get the chance to. She wasn’t entirely sure what was going to happen between them, or how long it would last and the thought sent a thrill of anticipation mixed with fear through her.

Chloe mentally shook herself, feeling silly for over analysing the situation as usual. She rushed to reassure him, typing out her reply quickly.

_It’s okay, you didn’t wake me, don’t worry. I haven’t really been able to get to sleep tonight._

His reply came soon after. Chloe knew the most stupid grin was plastered across her face as she read his text.

_Anything in particular that’s keeping you up? So I had the silly idea that we could sort of have a date over Skype. You know, talk over coffee or tea or whatever, maybe even have a romantic candlelit dinner?_

Chloe quickly typed a reply, still smiling.

_I think I’ve said that you’re rather distracting before...well, you manage to be distracting even when you’re nowhere near me… Wow, you don’t waste any time do you, Mr. Cumberbatch? I thought you’d want to wait until you get back from your trip before we arranged anything like that. Won’t you be rather busy over in America?_

And not to mention the time difference. Chloe made a mental note to check what the time difference between London and New York was.

_Well, we could wait of course...but I have to admit I’d really like to see you sooner rather than later...As for being busy, I’ll find the time._

Chloe could feel her cheeks blooming with heat. He wanted to see her! Suddenly she felt about fifteen years old, wanting to giggle and cover her face shyly, despite the fact he wasn’t even there to see her react this way. She realised she hadn’t really felt this way in the longest time, not since her first proper boyfriend when she was younger, complete disaster that it was.

She bit her lip, composing her reply.

_Well, Mr. Cumberbatch, I think you’ve persuaded me. I don’t think I’ve ever been asked on a Skype date before!_

Truthfully, Chloe had only ever used Skype to keep in contact with her parents and siblings during the university semester when she didn’t have as much spare time to see any of them in person. So this was bound to be interesting.

_Ah, well Miss Rowlands, there’s a first time for everything isn’t there?_

They exchanged Skype usernames before Benedict insisted he leave her alone to get some sleep and that he was about to board his plane anyway. She wished him a safe flight and a good time in New York, even if he was working, really.

Even without the texting she found herself lying awake, except this time she had a faint smile on her face and the proverbial butterflies never left her belly alone for long. Chloe finally fell asleep just as the grey light of dawn began to lighten her curtains, her phone cradled against her chest.

* * *

The next day, so to speak, Chloe dutifully dragged herself to her classes even while feeling the effects of the night before. Having only slept a couple of hours, she was inevitably groggy, her eyes puffy with lack of sleep. Even so, her heart felt light, thoughts of Benedict never far from her mind. She had forgotten what this sort of thing felt like, to be fixated on someone, to be infatuated with them. For a rather long time she simply convinced herself that she would rather be alone than have any sort of relationship other than friendship. Relationships were messy, in her limited experience. And her limited experience was the sole reason she was afraid of putting herself out there.

But impossibly, Benedict was coaxing her out of her little shell. Chloe still wasn’t yet sure where this was going, if this was going anywhere at all, but for once she was curious. She couldn’t deny wanting him or how intrigued she was by him.

Her day went rather quickly, thankfully. She was beyond tired by the time her last class ended late in the afternoon. She got home to find Brian sitting on the couch, the coffee table strewn with paper, a couple of books and his laptop. Chloe crossed the short space to plonk herself down on the couch next to him, dropping her bag in his lap just to be annoying. She examined one of the pieces of paper and realised they were her notes for Brian’s drama theory lectures.

“Hey,” she greeted Brian. “Cramming, are we?”

Brian grunted in response, his focus on the book in his hands. He didn’t even bother to move her bag. 

Chloe took the hint and took her bag, patting his head sympathetically. She headed to her room, peeking into Alex’s empty bedroom on the way. Figuring she’d gone to the shops or something, she shrugged and continued on to her room and threw herself onto her bed. She groaned blissfully, not bothering to take her bag off.

Chloe was in the state between sleep and wakefulness when her text alert went off somewhere in her bag, her phone vibrating against her side. She blinked blearily and struggled to disentangle herself from her bag strap, digging through her bag for her phone. When she saw who the text was from she went from barely awake to completely conscious in less than a second. It was Benedict.

_Hi, how are you? Was wondering if you’d be free to join me for a “date” on Skype soon-ish._

At the mention of this “date”, Chloe felt a mounting sense of excitement. She was keen to see him, to talk to him.

 _I’m great._ (Chloe didn’t think he needed to know how poorly she had slept the night before.) _And sure, when should we “meet” for this date?_

 

 _In about two hours, if that’s okay with you_?

 

_That sounds great, see you then._

Where she had been groggy with sleepiness just a few minutes ago, Chloe was now thrumming with renewed energy and she practically leapt off her bed, the prospect of seeing that face, hearing that voice, making her giddy with excitement. She paused to wonder about the effect he had on her but decided to leave it alone for the time being. It was what it was.

Chloe decided a shower should bring some much needed life back into her features and she did feel better after she was done. She made a conscious effort to wear something a little nice instead of what she’d normally be wearing at home at the end of a long day—an ensemble usually consisting of an oversized and worn out shirt and pyjama bottoms. This was a “date” after all, right?

Alex had come back with groceries while Chloe was still in the shower so after she had finished her shower, they busied themselves with preparing dinner for the three of them. Brian seemed grateful for the distraction, his eyes bloodshot and bleary-looking. He had been cramming for most of the day, he revealed to them after they sat down to eat. 

“Well who told you to take a random trip to India right in the middle of the semester?” Alex pointed out.

Brian just grumbled into his food. 

Chloe mentioned the “Skype date” and Alex gasped dramatically.

“Do you have any idea how lucky you are? That hunky dork of a man is taking time out of his day to video call you,” Alex said. 

Brian rolled his eyes. “Bendybum does seem pretty dorky.”

Chloe smacked his arm. “Be quiet, you!” She glanced at her watch and realised it was nearly time for the video call. She quickly finished her dinner and washed up her plate and haphazardly made herself a cup of tea, dashing here and there, while Alex and Brian looked on in amusement.

When she was done she sat at her desk, steaming mug of tea in her hand. She was hoping the caffeine would help keep her up a little longer. Her laptop was already on, Skype open. She wondered briefly whether she should ring him first but she wasn’t sure. Chloe drummed her fingers on her desk, deliberating, when a call came through, putting an end to her indecisiveness. Her heart kicked up a beat as she fully realised Benedict was actually calling her and she couldn’t help the stupid grin that crossed her face. She let it ring for a little longer, trying to compose her features, preferring not to look like an over excited freak when her face would appear on his computer screen. 

Finally she answered the call and her stomach flipped when Benedict’s face appeared on her computer screen. Chloe realised she had weirdly missed his friendly, handsome face. She barely stopped to think that it was a little odd to be missing someone that she technically barely knew. The man had a strange effect on her but for the time being she swept those thoughts aside. With the barrier of miles of land and ocean still between them, this call wasn’t quite the same as having him right in front of her but it was still a close second.

He grinned at her and waved. “Hello, Chloe.”

She still loved the way her name sounded in that mouth of his, and his deep voice still had a wonderful effect on her. She smiled back.

“Hey, how are you?” She noticed his hair was slicked back and he was rather neatly dressed—he had on a white button-down shirt, waist coat and tie. She also noticed what appeared to be a suit jacket draped on the back of the chair he was sitting in. She wondered where he was going or where he had been that he was so dressed up.

“I’m good, just got back from the Letterman show, hence the neat clothes,” he chuckled. She imagined him slipping out of his suit jacket and felt her insides melt a tiny bit. She had always had a bit of a thing for suits and neat clothes. Never underestimate the power of a good looking man in a suit to turn her into a blathering idiot.

She must have been staring or something because suddenly he looked rather amused.

“So how are you?” he asked, bringing her back to earth.

Chloe cleared her throat and her mind of an undressing Benedict. “Good, I’m good.”

“You sure?” he asked, laughing a little. 

She bit her lip and before she could think about whether she should just shut her big mouth, she blurted out exactly what she was thinking. “Actually, it’s the three-piece suit. And the hair. All of it. You...you look really good. Very handsome.” And not to mention sexy as hell. Chloe cleared her throat again and gave him an embarrassed smile. Why did she have to say all of that??

Benedict gave a surprised laugh. “What, this does it for you?” He gestured at his clothes. 

“Well, yes...I’ve always had a little bit of a...weakness for neatly dressed men,” she admitted, her cheeks feeling like they were aflame. Oh, why did she have to say anything at all? She felt like hiding her face. 

“I guess I’ll have to make a little more of an effort with my appearance from now on then,” he teased. “I don’t always dress this neatly. I’ll have to thank my stylist.”

“Oh, no, that’s not what I meant—!” she rushed to say.

“It’s alright, Chloe, I was just teasing you,” Benedict laughed. “You’re blushing! You don’t need to feel so embarrassed.” He smiled at her, his eyes looking oddly fond. She wondered why he was looking at her that way.

“I’m sorry, sometimes I say what I’m thinking and my mouth just runs before I have time to put a filter through,” she said, shaking her head at herself, giving him an embarrassed smile.

“It’s quite alright.” He grinned, looking pleased, warming her heart and slightly easing her discomfort.

Despite trying very hard to hide how tired she felt, she felt a yawn coming on. She stifled it discretely behind her hand.

“Didn’t get much sleep then?” he asked, guessing correctly.

She blushed faintly and was thankful that her web camera didn’t seem to be picking it up this time. “No,” she admitted. “Sorry. I’m not yawning at you, I promise.”

Benedict glanced at his watch, his mouth twitched to the side in thought. “It’s early evening over there, isn’t it? Perhaps you should just call it a night and go to bed?” he asked, sounding concerned but mildly amused at the same time. She had found out earlier in the day that London was about five hours ahead of New York. 

“I’m fine, really,” she said, laughing. “I’m no stranger to some sleep deprivation. And maybe I should get used to this seeing as how exams are coming up next week,” she joked.

Benedict chuckled. “Ah, exams. There are some things I really don’t miss about going to school.”

She rolled her eyes good-naturedly. “No need to rub it in, Mr. I’m All Grown Up And Have A Real Job And Don’t Need To Worry About Schoolwork,” she teased. “So, Letterman, huh? That sounds like a big deal.”

Benedict rubbed the back of his neck, chuckling. Chloe’s heart felt fit to burst at how adorable he always seemed to get when talking about this sort of thing. “Yeah, it was good. I was on there promoting Star Trek, so. ”

She smiled. “I bet you were great.”

He shot her a little self-deprecating smile that threatened her heart’s wellbeing further. She remembered how her first impression of him was one of easy confidence but she had begun to think that perhaps it was something that he switched on when performing or when he was in front of audiences. Or perhaps acting, doing the very thing he loved, brought out that ease and confidence in him. His humbleness and modesty always seemed to surprise her.

“My otter “likeness” came up,” he said suddenly, as if he’d just remembered something from the interview, chuckling.

“Otter likeness?”

“It’s an internet thing, I believe. Martin Freeman and my PA in particular seem to find it quite amusing.”

Curious, Chloe typed Benedict Cumberbatch and Otter into a search engine. She scrolled through the images and she bit her lip to keep herself from laughing but she couldn’t help herself, a delighted laugh escaping her lips. “Oh that’s so cute! Yes, of course, I can see the resemblance,” she joked.

When she opened the Skype call window again she saw he was smiling at her. Benedict paused, a strangely soft expression on his face as he gazed at her. “Have I mentioned at any point that you’re quite cute?” he asked, his eyes bright with amusement and something else.

She blinked at the compliment and smiled at him, her facial expression calm and collected even while her heart fluttered at the look in his eyes. “I don’t think you have, Mr. Cumberbatch.”

"Well you are. And you look very lovely right now,” he said, smiling softly. “Even if you look like you’re beyond ready to go to sleep.”

She laughed. “Thank you...I think.”

At that moment, Chloe heard someone talking to Benedict in the background. He turned his head towards whoever was speaking, his brow furrowed a little. Chloe took the chance to drink in the way he looked at that moment, his profile all sharp cheekbone and jawline, his shirt collar drawing the eye to the strong column of his throat. Oh, what wouldn’t she do to actually be there in person to kiss and nip at that neck lightly.

Chloe snapped herself out of it as he nodded and sighed quietly. He turned to face his computer again.

“Look, maybe you should just go to bed. I feel bad keeping you up...again,” he said, shooting her an apologetic smile. “I have to go anyway. Meetings.” She thought he looked a bit disappointed about having to go...or maybe that was wishful thinking.

“Okay.” Chloe smiled, even though she wished they could talk a little longer. “It was nice talking to you, Benedict.”

He smiled back, his face warm and open. She wanted nothing more in that moment than to be able to kiss his face, those lips. “Call me Ben. It was good talking to you too. Bye.”

She smiled again. “Goodbye, Ben,” she said, the easy familiarity of the name somehow feeling good in her mouth.

* * * 

After their call ended Chloe shut off her laptop and took Benedict’s advice. She went to say goodnight to Alex and Brian, only to find Brian was sprawled out on the couch, snoring loudly, his face pillowed against the pages of a book. She shut the light off and went to Alex's room, where the other girl was sitting at her desk.

“Just came in to say goodnight,” Chloe said, coming in to stand next to Alex.

“Oh, okay. How did the call go?” Alex asked, her smile turning sly.

Chloe grinned sleepily. “It went okay. I inadvertently called him sexy and I got to see his otter photos.”

Alex laughed. “Oookay. I'd say no call is successful unless you've discussed attractiveness and otters.”

“I'd agree,” Chloe said, yawning. “Anyway, g'night.” She went back to her room and switched the light off, gratefully climbing into bed. It wasn't long before sleep pulled her under.

* * *

Benedict said goodnight to Emily as she disappeared into the room next door to his. It had been a long day and he was glad that he’d be able to finally get some sleep. The jet lag was really beginning to get to him. He loved travelling and especially loved the fact that increasingly his work was taking him overseas. But he could have done without the jet lag. 

He rubbed a hand over his face tiredly as he unlocked his hotel room door, letting himself into his dark room. He switched on some of the lights and stood there for a moment. Another cold, empty hotel room.

Benedict sighed to himself, knowing he was being silly. He knew it was mostly just because he was tired, but there were some things that he never really got used to, lonely hotel rooms being one of them.

The thought of Chloe came to him suddenly and he smiled a little but the gloominess of the room still felt like a heavy weight, pressing in on him. Benedict checked his watch, filled with a mad desire to ring her or text her but it was half past ten, so it would be the wee hours of the morning over there. He felt mildly surprised that he had even considered it. After all, they had only just spoken a few hours ago.

Finally, he went over to the television and switched it on, mainly for the background noise.

Benedict moved through a shower groggily, still thinking idly of the younger woman. There had been a lot he had wanted to talk about during their conversation earlier that day that he hadn’t managed to say before having to say goodbye to her. 

Chloe had looked so lovely, even through a glowing computer screen, somewhat grainy image and all. He bit back a smile, his stomach flipping at the thought of her. Ah, the delights of courtship.

When he finally climbed into bed, he practically moaned blissfully as he rested his head on one of the pillows. His last thought before sleep stole over him was an odd wish that Chloe was with him, here in New York. He imagined she would like it, imagined taking her sight-seeing during his free time, then taking her back to his hotel room, her presence sure to banish the empty gloom.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As a present to try make up for how terrible I am at updating, have a million Benedicts! And another extra gif just because. I mean, it's Ben's face, do I really need to explain myself? :P  
> 
> 
>   
>   
> ([credit](http://abvh.tumblr.com/post/69094967879))
> 
>   
> 
> 
> Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed this installment of Lola. I feel like this particular chapter was a little odd and rambling, and I'm never 100% happy with how I write Benedict's POV. I keep thinking it sounds very empty and strange but oh well. I really wanted to post a new chapter. The writer's block I experienced thanks to this chapter was a bitch :/
> 
> Anyway, many MANY thank yous to those who always comment and encourage me to keep going. You are all so lovely and eee! *squishes you all in a tight hug*
> 
> Finally, I don't know if anyone is interested in this sort of thing but I made a playlist for this fic! :D Mainly because I was bored and suffering from writer's block. You can find it [ here ](http://8tracks.com/paleonpaleao3/all-about-your-heart). I don't know if it's really any good but heh :)


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe and Benedict have another Skype date and he finds out just what a cheeky tease she can be.

  _Chloe was in bed and she felt warm and comfortable. She felt loved. She could feel strong arms encircled around her waist, pulling her to a firm, warm chest. She sighed contentedly, the scent of Benedict’s skin surrounding her, filling her head, stroking her senses. He was murmuring in her ear, nuzzling her neck, lightly kissing it, sending shivers down her spine. She turned her head to catch his lips against hers for a chaste kiss. He smiled, a wicked look in his eyes, leaning in to deepen the kiss. His tongue swept her mouth, exploring, immediately turning her insides to jelly. His hands snaked up and toyed with her breasts, his nimble fingers teasing her nipples, sending bolts of pleasure straight to her groin. With one hand still gently working a breast, driving her crazy, his other hand roamed downwards until he was between her thighs. He reached her panties, his fingers pushing the fabric aside. She was aching for his touch, anticipating it. She moaned into his mouth as he finally touched her—_

Chloe was suddenly ripped from sleep rudely by her alarm going off. Disoriented, she slammed her hand down on the noisy thing to shut it off. She slumped back onto her pillows, groaning. It had just been a dream. She shook her head as most of the details of the dream fell away. The feeling of warmth and security of being in Benedict’s arms stayed with her, however...as well as the frustration of waking up just when the dream was getting really interesting.

She rolled over onto her side, squeezing her legs shut against the need she felt between her thighs. That man was the sole reason for her sexual frustration but there was not a whole lot she could do about it. All she wanted to do was go back to sleep and recapture the dream and see it through to the end...or better yet, have the real thing. She shivered in wicked delight as she thought of the feel of his hand skimming her skin, finding its way between her legs. Chloe wanted to lie in bed and just dream but she knew she needed to get up. She had her last couple of classes for the semester that morning and then work in the afternoon.

Chloe kicked her blankets off and dragged herself reluctantly from her bed, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

* * *

It was the end of the day and Chloe was helping to clean up the café before she and Mrs Moore locked up the place. She was sweeping up the café floor, trying (and failing) to keep her mind from the dream, when her phone vibrated in her back jean pocket. She set aside the broom for the moment and checked her phone, a small part of her hoping it was Benedict.

A big smile broke across her face as she saw it was indeed Benedict texting her.

 _Hello, Lola ;) I’m stuck in hair and makeup with not much to do_ _and was thinking about you. What are you up to?_

Chloe felt a lovely glow in her chest at the thought that he was thinking of her right now. She still couldn’t believe this was actually happening, that this amazing man was actually interested in her of all people.

Seeing her middle name in the text made her think of the way it sounded when he said it, the wonderful roll of letters on his tongue. She thought of the dream she had had the night before and wondered what it would be like to hear that deep, velvety voice in her ear, saying her name urgently as they moved together in bed. She sucked in a deep breath, snapping out of it, feeling very hot all of a sudden. Damn, the effect this man had on her, and he wasn’t even anywhere near her.

 _Just finishing up at work, actually. Hair and makeup for...another interview?_ _Or do you have some other nightly activities I should know about? :P_ _Alex has already found your Letterman interview online and is nagging me to watch it._ _I imagine I will have no choice when I get home, especially since you’ll be in that suit ;)_

Not too long later Chloe's phone vibrated in her pocket.

_Is that odd bloke working today as well? Well now, I should be able to keep some secrets, right? No, I’m just joking, yes, it’s for another interview and then another one later on in the day. Hopefully I won’t need to go through hair and makeup again for that one, once is quite enough. Hmm, if your reaction the other night was anything to go by, I think I’d love to see you watch the interview._

Chloe wondered if by “odd bloke” he was talking about Richard. He had indeed been working that day and had spent most of it flirting incessantly with Lily, one of the other girls who worked at the café. She hadn’t seemed to mind but personally, Chloe was just glad his attention was focused on someone else. He was harmless but could get rather irritating with his forwardness, constantly buzzing around. She wondered why Benedict was bringing him up.

_Odd bloke? You mean Richard? He was working today, yes. He is pretty weird, I agree. Well, I hope the interviews go smoothly. And hopefully you won’t be subjected to more hair and makeup sessions!_

In the time between receiving texts and answering them, Chloe had finished sweeping the shop up and had checked to make sure everything else was in order. When she thought she was ready to go home, she swung by the back office where Mrs Moore was, typing up something on the old computer.

“Everything’s done, Marie,” Chloe announced, smiling brightly.

“Well, you look happy, dear. I know it’s the end of the day, but is it really that bad being the last one here with me?” She jokingly pouted at Chloe.

“Oh, don’t be silly!” Chloe laughed. “Anyway, can I go home?”

“Of course, Clo. You have a nice night.”

“You too!”

Chloe practically skipped through the café, swinging out the door with the strange energy that Benedict seemed to ignite in her. She had taken her car to work to avoid the torrential rain they had had that afternoon so she walked the short distance to where she had parked her little car, smiling to herself. She hopped in and locked the doors, whipping out her phone eagerly to see if Benedict had replied already.

 _I’m sorry if this comes across as me prying...but do you mind if I ask whether_ _you two are together...or if you maybe have some kind of history?_

Chloe frowned at the text, wondering why he would think that and then she suddenly remembered the day Ben was in the café. Richard had acted so oddly (more than usual) and had been rather over familiar with her. It was no wonder he was asking her this. She thought about what Richard had said when she had confronted him after the little incident and wondered if maybe he had been trying to get a rise out of Benedict or something. But that made way for a new wave of questions so she swept the thought from her mind for the moment.

She rushed to reassure Benedict.

_No, no, we’re not together!_

_A thousand times, no! Richard is overly friendly with some of the girls at work,_ _me included unfortunately. But that day you saw him and me,_ _he had been particularly over familiar. I still have no idea why he acted that way._

Chloe sat in her car, waiting tensely for a reply, as the early evening sky outside grew steadily darker.

_I see._

Strangely, a tiny bit of panic bloomed in her belly at his short response. But before she could dwell on it and pick apart those two words, she got another text.

 _Oh, by the way, would you be up for another Skype session tonight?_ _I understand if you say no, it will be horrendously late in London by the time I’ll be able to call you._

Just as oddly and just as suddenly, relief flooded her system, flushing out the weird panicky feelings she was experiencing just a few moments ago. She wasn’t used to these weird mood swings, the strange little dance everyone does when there’s a new love interest in their life—the odd insecurity, the sensation of being on a cliff, toeing the very edge, the exhilaration of not knowing what comes next.

Chloe didn’t have work the next day, so it would be a rare free Saturday for her. But she knew that even if she did have work, she would still probably stay up into the wee hours of the morning to be able to see that face and hear his wonderful, silky voice.

It was an easy enough decision to make.

 _No, it’s okay, I would love another Skype session. I don’t have work or anything tomorrow_ _so I wouldn’t mind staying up tonight. Just tell me when to expect your call :)_

They arranged their next Skype “date” and doing the maths in her head, Chloe worked out that it would be about two in the morning when he’d call. She was no stranger to staying up late but she rarely stayed up that late. But she found she didn’t mind, especially since there would be something to look forward to.

Later, as Chloe was getting dressed after a shower, an idea came to her. She crossed her room to her wardrobe, flinging it open. A small corner of her closet was devoted to her lingerie collection. While she rarely had a reason to use the lingerie for another person, she simply adored lingerie, all the delicate lace, the feel of silk against the skin, how sexy and feminine it made her feel. A coy smile curled her lips as she picked out one of her favourite pieces and put it on.

She stood in front of her mirror, looking at the teeny, chiffon baby doll dress, and wondered if she was being a little too daring. She consoled herself by reminding herself that it was one of her more demure pieces, and that she could wear a dressing gown or something over it. The dream had her feeling rather cheeky and well, horny, and she wanted to see if she could make him feel the same sort of desire he had elicited in her with seemingly no effort at all.

* * *

Benedict looked at his watch for the millionth time as the lights and buildings of New York slid by outside the cab. He drummed his fingers on his knee and stroked his lower lip in thought. It was nearly nine, which meant he was running the risk of being late for his and Chloe’s Skype “date”. He sighed, wishing the car would go faster, but they’d had some rotten luck with traffic.

“Stop worrying, Ben,” Emily tutted from the seat next to him. “We’ll get back on time. We’re nearly there.”

“I know...I just don’t want to be late when I’ve already had her staying up for me,” he said.

“I’m sure she’ll understand,” Emily consoled him. Despite his desire to keep this thing with Chloe under wraps, he trusted Emily enough to tell her about it...whatever it was.

It was still early days, and he’d never done anything like this before. In the past it had been relatively simple: see nice girl, give her his number or take hers, go on a date, etcetera. The way he and Chloe were doing things was rather unconventional for most people, nevermind the added fact that he’d never considered dating someone so much younger than him.

“Did you want to go over what we’re doing tomorrow? Just to get your mind off things until we get back to the hotel?” Emily said, interrupting his thoughts.

Benedict sighed, but smiled gratefully at her. “Sure.” The rest of the journey was spent reviewing his schedule for the next day.

When Benedict finally let himself in to his hotel room, he heaved a sigh of relief, feeling rather tired from the day’s activities. Two interviews, one photoshoot to go alongside one of those interviews as well as an audition. Despite how wrung out he felt he immediately made a beeline for his laptop and switched it on. Benedict decided it was probably a good idea to go neaten himself up while it loaded. He shrugged out of his leather jacket and discarded it on the bed before making his way into the bathroom, where he tried to remedy his slightly rumpled, tired look. He splashed his face with water and ran his hands through his hair, letting out a big breath. The hotel bathroom light wasn’t exactly the most flattering lighting and with a wince he noticed he looked somewhat...old tonight.

Or perhaps it was the everlasting image of that younger man (read: arsehole that needed a kick) wrapped around Chloe’s body that day he was at the café. After Chloe’s explanation of Richarse’s behaviour, Benedict had realised what the look on her face was that day—total bewilderment and annoyance. It was an almost alarming amount of relief that had swept through him when she said they weren’t, and had never been, together. He had never been the jealous type, really, but seeing them together had driven him near mad with jealousy. It had surprised him at the time and he still didn’t understand it today. Chloe had brought all kinds of things out of him but the jealousy thing was a proper surprise. They weren’t even properly dating! And even if they had been dating, it was still no reason to behave or feel that way. He had never understood overprotective men before now. He felt he had no reason or right to feel possessive of her in any way.

And yet...he’d felt fiercely protective from the day he had laid his eyes on her, when she had batted her bright doe eyes at him and completely charmed him. So the image of that Richard pressed up against Chloe had bothered him exceedingly. It played havoc on Benedict’s still unsure feelings about his and Chloe’s age difference. He knew he had said that the age thing didn’t matter to him but it remained a small thing that niggled at the back of his mind. Surely it would look ridiculous, an older man such as himself, with a beautiful, younger woman. He almost couldn’t believe how insecure he was letting some twenty-something year old boy make him feel, but there it was.

He headed back to the desk where his laptop sat, trying to shake off those thoughts, grabbing a drink from the mini bar on the way. He checked the time as he sat at his computer and was glad to see he wasn’t late at all.

Benedict opened Skype and called Chloe with a mounting sense of excitement. When she answered not long after, there was that feeling of butterflies in his belly, which only intensified when she smiled that cute grin at him.

“Hi, Ben,” she said cheerfully.

“Hello, Chloe.”

He took a moment to take her in. She appeared to be sitting at her desk, her lamp casting a slight rosy pink glow over her features. Her eyes were bright, as they always were, as though she had a soft glow coming from within. Pale blonde hair was down, loose curls swept over one shoulder, allowing a view of her graceful, slender neck. He noticed she had on a silk robe, but what she had on underneath that was what captured his attention. The web camera limited his view but from what he could see, she had on a tiny, delicate top which offered a teasing view of her cleavage, lace edging the plunging neckline. In sum, she looked as delectable and alluring as ever.

“Ben?”

He snapped out of it and realised he’d been staring. He cleared his throat. “Sorry. It’s just that your night attire is rather...nice,” he finished inadequately, swallowing.

“What, this does it for you?” she said, quoting him from their previous Skype session. She gave him a flirty little smile.

He laughed. “Yes, definitely,” he answered immediately, nodding solemnly.

Chloe smiled at that. “So how was your day?” she asked.

“Long, but good,” he answered. “How was yours?”

She paused, licking her lips slightly as she thought. Even though it seemed to be an unconscious action, he found it to be strangely enticing. In the short time he had known her, he had noticed she tended to bite her bottom lip as well. If she happened to do that, in what she was wearing, looking so enticing but so far away and unattainable, he may well explode.

“It was okay,” she said, but she looked like she was keeping something to herself, a secret smile on her face.

“What is it?” he asked, his curiosity piqued.

Chloe seemed to think about whether to say it for a moment. “I may have had a dream about you,” she admitted finally. The blush he so liked bloomed in her cheeks, reddening her pale cheeks slightly.

He grinned. “Really? What happened in this dream?”

She waved her hand dismissively. “Oh, it wasn’t…I mean, you wouldn’t be interested…” She cleared her throat and raised a small bowl up to her face, examining its contents with deliberate concentration. He could see it was a large cluster of grapes and she plucked one off the stem and popped it into her mouth, as if this simple action needed her full attention.

“Anyway,” she said loudly, clearly eager to get off the topic. Benedict laughed. While he was curious what the dream was about, he decided to let it go for the moment.

“So how was work? Did Richard give you any more trouble?” he asked before he fully thought the question through. He winced inwardly. He didn’t want to sound like some kind of crazy, jealous man. Dwelling on it privately was one thing, broadcasting to Chloe how much this Richard-arse-infant-person bothered him was another.

“No, he didn’t,” she reassured him. “Thankfully Lily was in and he was completely focused on bothering her. Lily is someone else I work with,” she clarified. She seemed to hesitate before asking, “So why did you ask about me and Richard being together?”

He shrugged, feeling uncomfortable. “It just seemed like there could be something going on between you two. I just wanted to make sure there wasn’t.” He considered voicing his insecurities about their age difference but thought better of it.

“I see,” Chloe said, nodding. “Well, like I said, we’ve never been together and will likely never be together. Anyway, why would I want Richard when I’m interested in a much more mature, super dishy actor?” she teased, her eyes bright with laughter.

Chloe’s cheeky grin was infectious and he smiled, rubbing the back of his neck in a self conscious move. “Dishy?”

“Mhmm.” She popped another grape in her mouth, nodding. “So I watched you on the Letterman show,” Chloe said, smiling coyly. “That little sneak peek clip for Star Trek was particularly interesting.”

“Oh?”

She nodded, raising the cluster of grapes to her mouth. She took one into her mouth and he briefly saw her small pink tongue, her even teeth. The desire to kiss that mouth and do...certain other things with it ripped through him suddenly.  What she was wearing was not helping one bit—the sleeve of her robe had slipped down to reveal a pale shoulder and he realised what he had thought was a top appeared to be a dress. He saw that he could make out her pale, naked torso under the gauzy material.

A small smile crossed her lips and he realised he was very obviously staring at her as she ate those grapes. Something glimmered in Chloe's eyes suddenly.

To his surprise, Chloe held his gaze, and licked at a grape suggestively, her eyes smouldering. She oh so casually leaned forward, allowing him a generous view of her cleavage, as she wrapped her lips around the grape and sucked it gently into her mouth. His eyes strayed to what she was wearing again, the thin material of her little dress was just transparent enough to tantalise the imagination. He blinked and swallowed, wondering how she was making eating grapes so...sexy. In that moment he wanted nothing more than to be there with her, to be able to appreciate the little dress in person so he could tear it off her and kiss her flesh and ravish her.

She giggled and as if she didn’t know just what she was doing to him, she brought them back to their conversation. He felt almost equal parts relief and disappointment. At least he didn’t have to worry he would say something stupid while his brain had near turned to soup at her being a massive, adorable tease.

* * *

Chloe felt a rush of  adrenaline at being able to render Benedict speechless. Her little dress was working its magic and it, on top of the lingering feelings from her dream, made her feel sexy and seductive. But while toying with Benedict was fun and exciting, Chloe tried to steer the conversation back to what she had been meaning to say to begin with. She felt it was important that she got this out. Seeing the sneak peek clip of him in Star Trek had made her realise anew how good Benedict was at his work.

She shook her head to herself, looking at him, feeling amazed. She had admired his acting skills for a while and felt her admiration rushing forth now. “I just don’t get how you do it. You act and you change in that moment and it’s just so...incredible,” Chloe said, practically gushing. “It’s like you disappear into the character and you’re them…” she trailed off, not knowing how to convey what she meant, how awed she was by his talent. “Sorry, I must sound like a complete inarticulate freak,” she laughed. “I just really appreciate good acting.” Not to mention the fact that he looked positively delicious in that tight shirt, it clinging to and hugging his hard muscles. When she had watched it, she had had to fan herself as she suppressed a loud, girlish squeal into a teeny squeak.

To her amazement, she could detect a faint pink flush to his face. “Oh now look who’s blushing!” she exclaimed.

Benedict laughed. “I’m just pleased. I’ve managed to impress the woman I’m interested in!” He punched the air, shifting his facial expression to that of a triumphant one. He grinned at her and how adorable he looked while joking around threatened to make her heart explode. “But seriously...thank you,” he said, giving her a small embarrassed smile, a cute quirk of his lips. As usual, watching his face emote and shift between different expressions was fascinating and wonderful. She felt like she could study him all day. She suddenly felt envious of anyone who got to see him up close regularly. If only she was so lucky.

“Oh, Ben,” she sighed, feeling hazy and strange, her heart going a mile a minute. “You really don’t need to do much to impress me, honestly. I’m already insanely captivated by you. I can barely think of anything else.”

Benedict stopped and blinked at her in surprise. Seeing the look on his face seemed to snap her out of it and she could feel her face redden as she fully realised what she had just blurted out.

“I mean...sorry,” she laughed weakly. “No filter, remember?”

"No, don’t apologise,” he said quickly. He smiled, the look in his eyes soft. “I feel the same way, Chloe.”

Her stomach felt like she had just plummeted through open air, and this feeling of vulnerability made her feel a bit panicked and sick, but a feeling of complete happiness also surged through her as his words sunk in, sending her fear receding into the back of her mind. She wore a big, stupid grin on her face but she didn’t care one bit how silly she looked.

* * *

Benedict was in New York for another couple of days and they continued to Skype during that time. Chloe gladly stayed up to have these little “dates” with Ben, even while juggling studying for exams, picking up some extra shifts at work and making time for her friends. They were all a little strung out due to impending examinations however, so most of that time was spent quizzing each other or being unproductive by purposefully procrastinating. She never had a quiet moment.

Benedict and Chloe’s Skype sessions typically were spent chatting about their day. Benedict’s days were always much more interesting, but he always seemed genuinely interested in hers, to her unending surprise. They also spent their calls asking each other inane questions such as what their favourite colour was, what their favourite band of the moment was or what flavour cheesecake they thought was disgusting. Chloe discovered his favourite colour was emerald green, his current favourite band was Alt-J and that he loathed citrus flavoured cheesecake.

“Cheesecake flavours should be sweet!” he had exclaimed. Chloe had mentioned that perhaps he had tried some terrible cheesecakes and that she would help with that because as it so happened she made a pretty mean cheesecake. He promised to give citrus flavoured cheesecakes another go if she made one for him.

Benedict in turn learned that Chloe hated anything caramel flavoured (cheesecake or any other sort of cake), her favourite colour was the purple of lavenders and her current favourite band was a tie between Of Monsters and Men, Circa Survive and Korpiklaani, which turned out to be a folk metal band that Benedict had never heard of.

“Wow, folk metal is an actual thing?” Benedict asked, looking surprised and a little amused.

“Yes, sounds like it’d be awful but it’s really good actually. Very catchy and jaunty. Good music to dance and get drunk to,” Chloe said, laughing. She had developed a bit of a love for certain types of metal thanks to one of her older brothers who was a metalhead through and through.

“Well, if you say so,” he laughed with her. “Maybe we’ll listen to it together some day. I’d love to see you dancing while drunk,” he said, his eyes dancing with amusement.

The day came when Benedict was due to fly back to London. Chloe had wanted to be at the airport to see him come home, feeling slightly desperate to see him in person, but was unsure. They weren’t really together and she had to think about his privacy as well as hers. What if there were paparazzi around? Or fans? Surely if she ran up to him and leapt into his arms and kissed him fervently—his face, his mouth, his neck—people would probably notice. But it turned out that she had an exam right about the time he was due to land at Heathrow so that took the confusing decision out of her hands.

For the next couple of weeks Chloe and Benedict weren’t able to work out a good time to see each other for a proper date. He was busy and in deep filming Sherlock, along with other things he was in demand for, while Chloe had her examinations, all of them annoyingly scattered days apart. Normally she would be grateful for this, as it meant she could have ample time to focus on each exam and study accordingly, but this semester she was simply desperate for summer break to begin. She wouldn’t need to spend her days cramming (or procrastinating) and her nights staying up to talk to Benedict, which was the only time they could find to talk to each other, aside from texts. She found it incredibly difficult to know that the man she so wanted to see was in the same city as her but with how inaccessible he was, he could have still been in New York.

“I promise you, we will eventually find a day where both our schedules are free,” he said to her, almost laughing in exasperation. He was on set, in his dressing room, using his break to call her.

Chloe had brought her laptop on to her bed that night and had been lying on her side, head propped against her hand. She yawned widely, stretching her small body out across her bed like a cat, rolling onto her back for a moment. Benedict’s eyes widened slightly in appreciation as the thin fabric of her night dress pulled taut over her breasts as she arched her back.

It was the sixth night in a row that she had stayed up very late and it was taking it’s toll on her.

“You’re tired, Chloe,” Benedict tutted disapprovingly, his eyes softening. “Just go to bed. I’ve told you that you don’t need to stay up for me like this every night. You’re in the middle of exams!”

She waved a dismissive hand at him, blinking tired, bleary eyes. “Exam period is always like this for me! Late nights, five energy drinks a day, more cups of tea than I can count…” She stifled another yawn against the back of her hand. She glanced at the small rubbish bin in the corner of her room which was full to the brim with cans of Red Bull.

“Five energy drinks? A day??” Benedict practically spluttered. “Okay, love, you’re going to need to cut back on those things. Having even one of those horrid drinks isn’t good for you,” he chuckled endearingly, which rather ruined the stern look he was trying to give her.

“Make me,” she mumbled at him, the ghost of a cheeky smile on her lips, her eyes slanted with sleepiness. The term of endearment he used made her feel warmth spread through her chest and belly. _Love_. She could get used to hearing him call her that.

“Don’t make me come over there and spank you,” he joked.

Chloe reddened slightly as he said that. A recurring fantasy of hers lately was having him use those big, attractive hands to spank her bottom. The idea had come from yet another sex dream she had had of him—him being completely dominating and sexy as fuck while possessing her in bed. In reality she could not imagine him doing anything like that. He would probably be hopelessly adorable and apologise the whole time.

She looked at herself on her computer screen and realised with dismay that her face had visibly gotten rather flushed. Damn her near translucent skin!

Luckily he didn’t notice how pink her cheeks had gotten because someone off camera caught his attention and he responded to them, nodding. He turned his attention back to Chloe.

“I’ll be right back, okay? There’s just something I have to deal with really quick.”

Benedict shifted the laptop off his lap and placed it precariously on some cushions on the couch he had been sitting on, so now she had a skewed view of his dressing room. She pulled a pillow under her head while she waited, the desire to lie her head down becoming more and more difficult to ignore. She blinked at the computer screen sleepily, trying to keep focus.

When he came back a few minutes later and settled back into the couch with his computer, he realised Chloe had fallen asleep. He felt his chest tighten at the simple sight before him. Her eyes were closed and her mouth was very slightly open, her face relaxed, the perfect picture of someone sound asleep. A lock of her ash-blonde hair had fallen across her cheek and he longed to brush it aside gently and kiss her cheek. Instead he contented himself with watching her sleep for a little while, feeling all at once peaceful at the calm scene before him and like there was a storm of emotions taking place inside him as he longed for her. He was becoming hopelessly smitten with her, his feelings growing despite the distance between them.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much if you've read this far! This was such a long chapter :D Let me know what you thought of this chapter and any improvements etc this story could use! I always love hearing from you guys :)
> 
> An endless amount of thank you's to all those who continue to support me :) I don't think I would've even gotten past the first couple of chapters of this fic if it weren't for you guys ^-^ 
> 
> Anyway, here, have a hunky dork!
> 
>   
> 


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Benedict and Chloe finally get to meet again.

It was just a few hours after Chloe had finished her last exam and she was still feeling the end of term elation. Oh, to not have to think about exams or schoolwork for the next couple of months! She smiled at her reflection in her small vanity mirror, sweeping some eyeshadow on her eyelids, concentrating on blending it evenly. Feeling satisfied with her work she put some finishing touches on her makeup and cleared away her brushes. She stepped into the heels she had picked out for that evening and stepped in front of her full length mirror to examine how she looked.

She felt rather daring in a wiggle dress that she hardly ever got to wear, the fabric clinging close to her skin. Normally she disliked her rather extreme hour-glass shape but the dress managed to make her tiny waist and disproportionately large hips look rather good. She had also made a little more effort than usual with her makeup that night. The heels she had put on added about four inches to her short height—at least she would feel a little less like a dorky miniature person for the evening standing at a more average-ish height. Chloe smiled at her reflection, pretty happy with what she saw.

She only wished she was seeing Benedict. It was yet another evening where their schedules clashed. She was only dressing up because Brian had invited her for moral support to some kind of networking party that evening and he had made it sound like a semi-formal-dress event. She had her doubts, however, since it just sounded like a staff-student type of party for the Arts department, so students could network and get help with making connections. Even so, Chloe wasn’t going to miss an opportunity to dress up a little. She was in the mood to pretty herself up and be Brian’s (annoying) sidekick.

Benedict had mentioned he too was going to some kind of party that evening. Chloe sighed to herself, wondering if she was ever going to get to see him. She understood his job was demanding, especially now that his popularity was rising, but the desire to see him was just getting stronger and stronger the longer they were apart. It had been nearly a month since that encounter in his makeshift office and her skin was practically itching with the need to feel him close again. And what if the distance was making him bored? They weren’t even properly dating, hadn’t spent any real time together aside from Skype calls, and those were becoming shorter and less frequent because of his tight schedule. So really, breaking things off with her would be easy.

Chloe shook her head at herself, amazed and somewhat disconcerted at how strongly she missed him, at how anxious and unsure she was becoming. She knew she had her reasons for feeling so insecure but she was trying her hardest to suppress those thoughts. She tried to look on the bright side—perhaps now that she had some more free time on her hands, there might be more chances for them to see each other.

“Come on, Chloe, let’s go!” Brian called from the living room.

Chloe snapped out of her daydreaming. Frowning, she grabbed her little purse and slung it over her shoulder, it bouncing against her hip as she hurried out of the room.

Brian was standing by the front door, tapping his foot impatiently, his arms crossed. 

“Why do you always take ages to get ready?!”

“What do you mean? I was waiting for you!” Well, sort of.

“Come on, guys,” Alex interrupted, her voice weary. “Go or you’ll actually be late.” She was sitting on the couch, huddled under a few blankets, her hands clutching a steaming mug of soup. She had a cold and a fever that she was trying to sweat out. Being swaddled up in a bunch of blankets like she was and snapping at them, it was almost like having a big lump of fabric scold them.

“Al, are you sure you’ll be okay on your own?” Chloe asked, feeling concerned. She knew the networking party meant a lot to Brian but she also felt bad about leaving Alex alone in the flat in her condition.

“Yes, I’m sure. I’m a big girl, Clo. Brian on the other hand is a big girl’s blouse—”

“Hey!” Brian exclaimed.

“—and he needs you there. I’m sure you’ll have much more fun mingling with Arts professors and their connections and whatnot than tending to my sick self,” she grumbled, her voice sounding like it was coming through wads of tissue. “Now, go! I just want to finish this soup and go to sleep.”

So with that they let themselves out of the flat, and went out towards Chloe’s little beat up car. She made to get into the driver’s seat but Brian stopped her.

“Clo, can you even drive in those shoes?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow. “You look great, by the way. Pretty sure I’ll have to beat off greasy suitors with a stick for you,” he teased.

Chloe rolled her eyes. “I’m sure everyone will have better things to do at this thing, Brian. And as for driving, if you’re suggesting that you should drive, to that I say fuck no—”

“Why not? Those heels look like they’re tricky to walk in, even more so to drive a car in.”

“I walk in these heels just fine, thank you.”

“Let me drive!”

“Do you remember why you don’t have your own car anymore, Brian?”

“Just let me drive!”

“You decided to sell it so you could go on your holiday. It’s just as well that you don’t have a car anyway, Bry, you drive like a lunatic.”

“Clo, just let me drive! It’s not safe with those shoes!”

So Chloe drove them the short distance over to their university, her shoes in Brian’s lap, while he stared sullenly out the window. He mock glared at her as he handed her shoes over to her when they arrived.

“So where are they holding this thing anyway?” Chloe asked while she hopped on one foot then the other, putting her shoes back on.

“Well, they kept changing the venue around. In the end I got an email saying there would be signs up around campus to direct people to where they finally decide to hold the party.”

Sure enough they found the first sign nearby, declaring the party would be held in the gym. The gym was the biggest building on campus that wasn’t a lecture theatre, so it made sense. Knowing exactly where it was, they didn’t need to consult the signs, presumably there for those who were not as familiar with the campus as the students going to this thing. Brian and Chloe approached the building, and saw through the open doors that efforts had been made to make the big room seem more festive and welcoming. Lights had been strung up around the room, a couple of large tables held food and drink and there was a bit of music playing in the background. There were plenty of people already there, mingling and talking.

Brian smoothed back his hair and sucked in a deep breath. Chloe smiled at him encouragingly and squeezed his arm. She knew this was important to him—every other year he had been invited he hadn’t been able to go, so this was a big deal. He knew networking and making connections with the right people was part of the ideal way to get a break in acting, which had always been his passion since school. He returned her smile and took her wrist in his hand, pulling her inside the big room.

* * *

“I think one of the most important things to keep in mind when you’re going into this industry is commitment and drive...and maybe a good agent.” Laughter followed Benedict’s somewhat feeble joke. “But seriously, just keep going and stay active. Go to workshops, audition, whatever it takes to get yourself out there. The Actors Centre in Tower Street is great for classes and the like.”

Benedict was addressing a group of people who were listening to him eagerly. He took a moment to sip his ginger ale and Stephen, another drama professor Benedict was friendly with, chimed in, agreeing with Benedict. He delved into the kind of thing the Actors Centre had to offer which thankfully directed the group’s attention to him as he talked, giving Benedict an opportunity for a bit of a breather. He’d spent the short time since he had arrived answering a barrage of questions, which he was happy to answer of course, but he was feeling rather distracted and worn out that evening. His eyes swept over the twinkling lights adorning the walls of the big room, wondering what Chloe was doing at that moment.

Benedict saw movement in the corner of his eye and automatically looked, glancing away from the people he was talking to. He blinked, his heart kicking up a beat in surprise when he saw none other than Chloe walk in through the big doors. And then he realised she was being led by a tall bloke holding her hand. A sudden stab of jealousy knifed through his chest. His eyes narrowed at the two of them, as he wondered who the man was. Since this was an Arts department party, he guessed that it could be Brian, the friend she had spoken of who was studying drama. He tried to find reassurance in that idea but was finding it difficult, especially when he was behaving so familiarly with her, his hand still closed around hers. He suddenly felt territorial but, realising how ridiculous that was, he made a conscious effort to suppress those thoughts.

What she was wearing wasn’t helping any. She looked absolutely exquisite in a tight dress with a rather low-cut back, loose tendrils of hair escaping the artfully messy bun her hair was swept up in. He felt the urge to take down her hair, see it tumble down her bare back and dreamt of running his hands over her skin, tracing patterns in the soft flesh. Benedict watched as her eyes swept the room and his heart swelled at the sight of her. But she was pulled in the opposite direction by the man she was with and he was pulled back into the conversation he was having, as he apologised for daydreaming.

* * *

As they entered the room, Chloe took the opportunity to survey the crowd and noticed that indeed, most of the people were dressed neatly but casually and not semi-formally in any way. She tried to not feel so overdressed.

Brian spotted Joanne first so they made a beeline for her. Brian greeted her and she greeted them warmly.

She seemed to recognise Chloe. “Oh, it’s Benedict’s shadow!” she said jokingly. “I guess I shouldn’t be surprised to see you here, eh?” Her eyes twinkled.

Chloe looked from her to Brian confusedly, but Brian’s face mirrored her own confusion.

“Benedict is right over there, dear,” Joanne clarified. She pointed across the room.

Chloe’s stomach felt as if it bottomed out at the mention of Benedict. She went on tip toe to see over people’s heads, a dangerous feat in heels, as she tried to catch sight of him where Joanne had pointed. What was the point of high heels if she still had trouble seeing over people in crowds?? But sure enough, there he was, surrounded by a gaggle of students practically fighting over one another for a word with the actor. From what she could see, his hair was his usual sexy rumple of dark waves, his expression as friendly as ever. Chloe sucked in a deep breath, her heart suddenly racing. She was acutely aware that the last time she had seen him in person they had been kissing passionately.

She composed herself however, knowing she needed to be there for Brian. Benedict looked pretty busy at that moment anyway. She was sure she’d get a chance to greet him later. Her thumping heart told her she was also trying to stall before seeing him. That old familiar fear she carried around with her was rearing its ugly head. Even though the past few weeks had been a sort of torture, the growing need and want to see him plaguing her existence, she found herself almost unbearably nervous now that they were within twenty metres of each other.

“Thank you but I’m actually here for Brian,” she said finally, smiling politely. “Moral support, you know.”

“That’s so sweet!” Joanne exclaimed. “Are you two together?”

Brian and Chloe quickly corrected her and explained that they were just friends and that Chloe had been taking classes for Brian in his stead. Joanne remarked that it was very nice of Chloe to do so.

Brian put an arm around Chloe, hugging her to his side, a strong arm snaking around her shoulders, practically pinning her there. He ruffled her hair, much to her annoyance—he knew she hated that.

“Yep, Chloe is wonderful,” Brian said as Chloe struggled to smooth her hair and disentangle herself from Brian’s vice-like grip, failing miserably. She wasn’t sure what had gotten him to behave like this. He sometimes acted this way when he decided to take on his role as protective “big brother”. And that was when she caught sight of Benedict, looking right at them, frowning a little. The group of people who had surrounded him only a few minutes before were gone and he was standing quite alone for the moment.

He strode over to them, carefully arranging his features into that open, kind expression even though Chloe noticed the slight tension in his shoulders, the tightness to his smile. She finally wrestled herself free from Brian’s hold, throwing a glare at him.

“Hello again, Joanne,” Benedict said when he reached them, smiling at her.

“Benedict, I was just speaking with one of my students. And I believe you know Chloe here?”

Benedict’s eyes rested on her, sending a thrill through her, despite the near glacial coldness to them as he regarded her. He smiled at her all the same. “Yes, I know Chloe.” She suppressed a shiver at the sound of her name in that mouth, the deep, silky voice carrying it towards her. Chloe knew she could get lost in those eyes as they bore into her. But she couldn’t understand why he was acting so strangely. She really hoped it had nothing to do with Brian.

Chloe cleared her throat, trying to snap out of it. “Hi,” she said feebly. She grappled for something to say and realised Brian hadn’t actually been introduced so she dove for the opportunity to say something instead of stand there and gape like a fish. “Benedict, this is Brian. Brian, Benedict.”

Benedict and Brian shook hands, each man’s eyes appraising the other. Chloe could have groaned when she noticed Brian was acting every bit the over-protective “brother”, assessing and sizing up Benedict with calculating eyes, despite the fact that he was shaking hands with one of his favourite actors.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Brian said first. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

The emphasis in Brian’s voice was not lost on Benedict and his eyes found Chloe’s and he raised his eyebrows at her. Chloe could feel her cheeks turning pink. Maybe he hadn’t wanted her to tell anyone about whatever it was they were doing.

But he returned his gaze back to Brian’s, meeting his eyes unflinchingly. “It’s nice to meet you too. Chloe has mentioned you before as well.”

Their small group continued to have conversation and Brian seemed to relax somewhat under the force of Benedict’s easy charm. It wasn’t so much that Benedict seemed to actively switch it on or anything but he seemed to have an ability to talk to people easily and his innate charm simply shined through. She found herself fascinated by the way he was able to talk and mingle easily.

Chloe felt like her ability to talk was seriously hindered by his presence, barely able to even think of stringing together a sentence. There was the familiar overwhelming feeling of tension that came over her when he was nearby. She took advantage of not really being a part of the conversation by letting her eyes drink Benedict in, feeling a little like an addict getting their fix. He was dressed in a leather jacket, an Oscar the Grouch shirt on underneath, jeans and black Chuck Taylors. His eyes were friendly, his nose crinkling when he laughed. She wished she could run her hands through his hair and tried not to sigh at the perfection standing right before her. He looked good enough to eat. Even without trying he looked unbelievably appealing.

Benedict’s eyes kept flicking back to hers, making her nerves feel jittery and on edge, almost as if she’d had ten cups of coffee. She suddenly wished she had a drink or something, anything to pretend to concentrate on so she wouldn’t seem like such a freak, staring at him, longing for him.

After some time, Joanne spotted someone she thought Brian should meet and she beckoned him to come with her. Chloe looked at Brian, asking silently whether he wanted her to come. Brian looked over her and Benedict for a moment before shaking his head. He smiled at her to reassure her that he’d be fine and he followed Joanne across the room.

Chloe watched him go, equally relieved and tense to be left alone with Benedict. She looked up at Benedict tentatively, wondering if he was still going to act strangely. But his eyes seemed to have warmed somewhat and he gave her a small smile.

“Do you mind accompanying me outside for a smoke?” Benedict asked, breaking the silence.

“Sure.” She smiled at him as he took her hand in his, pulling her gently towards the exit. She relished the feel of his skin on hers.

They made their way outside and stopped beneath a big tree, which offered them a bit of privacy, the leaves rustling overhead as a breeze stirred them. The sun was setting, pink clouds streaking the sky above them.

She watched him as he fished out a cigarette and a lighter from his pocket and felt herself staring at his hands, wondering what they would feel like on her body, on her bare skin...the sort of thoughts she had rather too often.

Benedict noticed her staring and he offered her the pack of ciggies in his hand but she shook her head. She used to smoke a lot back in school but had for the most part stopped, aside from the occasional cigarette.

He lit up his cigarette, and took the first drag of it, the end glowing. As always she couldn’t help noticing the planes of his face, his high cheekbones made even more sharp by his cheeks hollowing slightly as he inhaled. Watching him smoke was turning out to be weirdly erotic. She swallowed and shook herself mentally, trying to get a grip.

He looked at her face, assessing her expression.

“I hope you don’t suddenly find me disgusting,” he said, gesturing at the cigarette in his hand, rubbing the back of his neck self consciously.

Chloe blinked. “No, of course not.” She paused. “Just the opposite actually.” She gave him a small, wicked smile.

He seemed pleased, and his face broke into a slow smile, making her stomach leap.

Suddenly she felt like she couldn’t stand the space between them any longer, the awkwardness that blanketed them, both of them unsure how to conduct themselves now that they were finally and unexpectedly together again. She stepped closer, gingerly taking the cigarette he was smoking and took a drag. She never usually would have dared, but she needed to make the first move, needed to dispel the weird tension, needed to try overcome her fears. She’d given them free reign over her life for far too long she realised.

She gave him a coy smile, allowing herself to stare into his eyes.

He grinned back, watching her. “You know, you make smoking look so...” he trailed off.

“So...what?” she asked quietly, the smile still playing across her lips. She took another drag, holding it in her lungs for a bit before allowing the smoke to trail from her mouth slowly.

He leaned in quicker than her mind could follow. It seemed as though he was going to kiss her, his mouth lingering so close to hers, but instead he breathed in the smoke she was exhaling. He tilted his head away slightly, breathing out, his eyes still on her. She watched him, fascinated. She gently placed the cigarette back between his lips. He puffed on it, the end glowing.

Suddenly they heard voices nearby and they sprang apart automatically. It turned out to just be people walking by and when the voices moved on, their eyes met and they both chuckled, amused at their synced reaction.

His eyes softened a little as he studied her face. “You look beautiful tonight,” Benedict said.

Chloe tried not to blush. “You look pretty great yourself, Mr. Cumberbatch.”

He looked her up and down, biting his lip slightly, his eyes undressing her. Goosebumps raced across her skin and her heart kicked up a beat as that dark look appeared in his eyes. It didn’t help how gorgeous he looked to her, simple clothes, his features gilded by the warm tones of the sun setting. With him staring at her like that, she suddenly didn’t regret overdressing that evening.

“Seriously, love. You look fucking fantastic right now.” She felt like she might melt under that gaze. “I mean, not that you don’t look great all the time. You’re a very pretty girl,” he said, his words stumbling over each other, his cheeks going a little pink, his cheeks dimpling as he gave her a sheepish smile.

Chloe felt like her senses were being overloaded. One second he was looking at her like he was considering fucking her right there out in the open and the next he was being insanely cute. She let out a breath. “Stop being so adorable, Ben. You’re killing me here.” She clasped her hands behind her back to keep herself from throwing herself at him and mauling him like a sexually starved maniac. She suddenly got an idea and it was so clear and simple. She knew it was going to be very bold of her but she just didn’t care. She didn’t even stop to think of how she might react if he said no.

Chloe raised her eyes to meet his, biting her lip nervously. “Come home with me tonight, Ben.”

He blinked and stared at her for a moment. Rather than be deterred by his lack of response, she stepped closer, daringly pressing her body up against his.

“Don’t you want to come home with me tonight, Ben?” she asked softly, tracing a finger against his chest, feeling a wonderful thrill go through her at the feel of their bodies pressed close and another when Benedict placed a hand on the small of her back. She shyly looked up at him and gave him a small smile.

His eyes were smouldering and he seemed to be having some kind of internal struggle.

“Yes, I’d love to.” He groaned softly. “But I have to stay here a little longer. Joanne will have my arse if I leave this early. And I’ll feel incredibly guilty.”

She smiled. “That’s okay, I understand.” She felt a teeny bit of disappointment, wanting to leave at that very moment but still, her heart soared at the idea of him coming home with her later. It was still a win and she was so glad he hadn’t turned her down. She subtly ground her hips against him, making him close his eyes and groan again. “Just try not to be too long, Ben, please?”

Benedict opened his eyes, the smouldering, dark look boring into her. “I doubt I’ll be able to keep myself from you for very long anyway, Chloe.”

She felt like she had stopped breathing at those words, the intense look in his eyes. Gingerly, like he was exercising great control, he kissed her, his mouth pressing against hers sweetly. The daydreams she had had these past few weeks of kissing him again paled in comparison to the real thing. She tried her best not to lose herself and her control at the feel of his mouth on hers and was somewhat grateful when he pulled away, lest she throw him down in the grass and do him right there. The effect the man had on her body was incredible and dizzying.

They headed back inside together but she let him get back to mingling and talking to people while she went in search of Brian. Brian looked at her flushed cheeks and her big grin a little oddly but didn’t comment.

A couple of torturous hours later, Benedict texted her.

_You ready to leave?_

_Oh, God, yes._

_Meet me outside. I’ll drive._

Her heart thumping, excitement thrumming through her, she dropped her car keys in Brian’s hand.

“I’m leaving...getting a lift home,” she explained when Brian looked at her questioningly.

“Oh...with…?” Brian figured he knew who she was leaving with.

She bit her lip, nodding, her eyes bright with excitement.

Brian rolled his eyes. “You dog,” he teased.

She punched his arm but couldn’t help grinning. “Just drive carefully!” she said as she walked away, hurrying out of the building.

Chloe found Benedict outside, patiently waiting for her. He held out his arm to her, smiling.

“Shall we?”

* * *

When they arrived at her flat, she let them in, trying to make as little noise as possible. She looked towards the couch and saw Alex was asleep, the television still on, its light and colours playing over her.

In the car on the way over, Chloe had warned Benedict that Alex would be home but reassured him she’d most likely be conked out on her cold and fever medicine.

Benedict shut the front door behind him carefully, making sure not to make a noise. She smiled at him and took his hand, leading him to her room. Her eyes swept the room, making sure it looked presentable, feeling glad she was a normally tidy person. She looked toward the bed and winced, however, wishing she had chosen different sheets. Her bed was currently patterned with Beatrix Potter’s Peter Rabbit. They were her oldest and most comfortable bed sheets but now she wished she had chosen something a little less juvenile.

Benedict didn’t seem to have noticed though, his eyes and attention solely on her. He looked almost unbearably yummy, simply leaning against her doorway, watching her. Her stomach flipped and she found herself barely believing that Benedict was actually in her room.

For something to do, she crossed the room to her desk, chucking her purse into her chair. “So, that was Alex,” she said, desperate for anything to say. “She’s not feeling very well, like I said.”

His eyes lit up in recognition. “Oh, yes, I remember her now. The girl who called you Lola.” He smiled. “So is that part of your real name or is it just a nickname your friend has given you to make you feel uncomfortable?” he asked, amusement in his eyes.

She gave him a small smile. “So you picked up on that did you? It’s my middle name...I’ve hated it for the longest time, honestly.” Since sometime back when she was teenager, but that was nothing they had to get into at that moment.

Suddenly he looked somewhat apologetic. “Oh...sorry I used it then. I didn’t realise…I just thought she used it for a bit of fun.”

Chloe crossed over to him. “No, no...don’t be sorry.” She looked up at him, her chest filled with warmth at the concern on his face. “I actually don’t seem to mind the name when you use it.” She chuckled ruefully, looking down shyly. “Which is a first, I can tell you.”

Benedict brushed a hand against her cheek and gently tilted her head up to meet his eyes.

She looked up into his face, swallowed up by the feeling blooming in her chest, the soft look in his eyes. In her bedroom light his eyes looked like the bright, warm green of sunlight filtering through leaves.

The feeling of tension and electricity between them was building now that they were there, the physical distance of the past few weeks taken away. Chloe felt like she was on the edge of a cliff, charged with adrenaline, taut with the promise of what was to come. An almost excruciating feeling of desire thrummed between them as they seemed to be waiting, seeing who would make the first move.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew! I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!
> 
> As usual, I genuinely love hearing from you guys so feel free to comment and talk to me :) I really appreciate constructive input and the like so yeah!  
> I wish I could update this fic more often but finding the time to is always a little difficult. I am really sorry for those of you who care enough about how often I update :( 
> 
> Love to all my wonderful readers!


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A million apologies for how long it's taken me to update this. I could go on about how busy and hectic my life has been but that's not what you want to read, so maybe I'll save that until the End Notes :) Hope you enjoy and thanks for your patience!

Chloe watched Ben in the warm light of her room with bated breath. His eyes were on her, watching as well, green eyes glowing as the tender look in his eyes slowly dissolved into that almost predatory look, dark desire burning in his eyes.

She briefly thought of all the things women were meant to do in this situation, to seduce but not to seem overly eager, to keep a man on his toes. But her body was screaming at her brain to just go for it, expectations of her be damned! How long had it been since she had been _this_ interested in a man? How long had she automatically shut herself away from anyone who showed an interest in her? How long ago had she sworn to never throw her whole self into something, into someone? And here she was, ready and eager to give herself up for someone. Somehow Ben had broken through to her and amazingly she wasn’t running away. She knew with all her being (horny or no) she wanted to give her whole self to him, trust in him to accept what she had to offer, and reciprocate. A part of her was still terrified of all this but she actively reminded herself that this wasn’t her ex, this wasn’t someone who wanted to hurt her. She had been introduced to the world of love and sex by someone who hadn’t had her best interests at heart and she was tired of it influencing her every decision even now, years later.

Not to mention all she wanted was to throw herself at him, let him fulfil the promise in his eyes. So she did just that.

Just like he did on that fateful day in his makeshift office what seemed like lifetimes ago now, she crossed the space between them swiftly, going on tip toe, wrapping her arms around his neck. She hesitated for just a moment, as she took in his widened eyes, the sudden burst of lust she saw there as his arms snaked around her, pulling her closer to him. She tried not to smile so triumphantly as he lowered his face to meet hers, their lips colliding. She felt that wave of longing rise up and swell inside her as they explored each other’s mouths, as his fingers trailed torturingly down her bare back. He rested his broad hand against the base of her spine and pulled her even closer, kissing her hungrily, as if there was something in her he craved desperately.

At that moment, Chloe’s phone began ringing from the depths of her bag. Ben pulled away for a moment and gave her a questioning look. She shook her head in answer, pulling him back to her. Whoever was calling could wait. She didn’t feel as though she could pull away all that easily anyway now that she was finally with Ben.

Eventually the phone stopped ringing and Chloe began gently pulling Ben in the direction of the bed, thankful for the silence after the shrill ringtone of her phone. She pushed Ben down to sit on the edge of her bed and climbed up so she was straddling him and he grinned up at her appreciatively. Ben’s eyes roamed her face, taking in every detail, the way the light in the room cast a soft glow to her ethereal features, almost making her look otherworldly, the way stray blonde curls fell across her flushed cheeks, how she was biting her lip, all these things were driving him crazy. His gaze met hers and her eyes betrayed an odd look of vulnerability which he immediately felt drawn to, and wanting to kiss away and dispel her uncertainty he placed his hand on the base of her neck so he could pull her closer.

At that moment they heard a soft knocking at Chloe’s bedroom door and they stopped and listened.

“Clo?” Alex’s muffled voice came from the door as she knocked again.

Chloe groaned a little, sagging against Ben. What was going on? She gave Ben a small kiss on the lips and apologised before getting off him, hoping she wasn’t being as ungraceful as she felt, wondering how graceful one could be while clambering off someone. She crossed to her door quickly and opened it just far enough for her to squeeze her head through. “What’s wrong?” Chloe asked, hoping she didn’t seem too antsy.

Alex held up her phone. “Brian called, said you weren’t answering,” she said. She wrapped her blanket more tightly around herself. “No idea why but he sounded frantic.”

Chloe frowned, feeling worried. “Oh, my phone is in my bag...and I may be _entertaining_ someone…” She gave Alex a pointed stare, hoping she would get her meaning. “So I couldn’t answer and thought I’d ring them _later_ …”

Alex blinked her red, puffy eyes at Chloe owlishly before they widened. “Oh…gotcha. But Brian was adamant, he needs you to call him back. Or at least wait for him to get home, because he has some important “news” or something, I don’t know…” she trailed, sounding tired, already making her way to her bedroom.

From inside Chloe’s room she could suddenly hear Ben talking and she craned her neck to look and he was on his phone, frowning and nodding.

She turned back to Alex’s retreating figure, being swathed in blankets giving a strange impression of a shuffling mass of fabric in the half light of the dimly lit apartment. “What news?” Chloe asked.

Alex shrugged. “He didn’t say, just said to tell you to wait for him. I’m going to bed before I pass out in the hallway, night!” she said shortly, before shutting her door behind her with a decisive snap.

Chloe sighed, feeling confused. She turned back into her room and shut the door behind her, noticing Ben was standing, looking at his phone with a deep frown on his face.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“That was the set...turns out they need to re-do some scenes ASAP and that they really need me there.”

Chloe’s heart plummeted with disappointment. “Oh…” was all she could manage.

“I’m sorry, Chloe. I don’t want to leave, believe me...but there _is_ a deadline and they’d have my arse boiled in a bag for breakfast if I didn’t go.”

She nodded, putting on a smile. “I understand.”

Something in her tone or in the expression on her face made him cross over to her and pull her against him. “I’m really sorry, love. Having you within physical reach after all this time apart and then having to go is genuine torture. I wish there was something I could do.”

Chloe nodded, believing him. She titled her face upwards and he leant down to kiss her lips gently, lingering a while, the sweetness of it melting her feelings of doubt and disappointment.

They finally pulled apart and Chloe led him to the front door of the flat. When they reached the door, Ben grasped her hand and lifted it to his lips. “I’m sorry again for leaving, love.”

The term of endearment never failed to tug at her heartstrings, and she smiled up at him. “It’s okay, I understand.” She tried to stamp down on the disappointed feeling in her stomach.

He leant down and pressed his lips against hers. “Until next time,” he murmured against her lips.

 _Whenever ‘next time’ is_ , she thought to herself once the door had shut behind him.

 

* * *

Chloe was sitting on the couch in front of the telly, lounging in her comfiest (and ugliest) pyjamas, when Brian came home some twenty minutes later. She immediately set down the mug of hot chocolate she had been nursing, and got up, concern etched in her tired face.

“So? What’s up? What happened?”

Brian stopped in the process of moving towards his room and turned to her and to increase Chloe’s confusion he had a look of guilt on his face, mixed in with defiance.

He sighed. “I just...didn’t want you to make mistakes...like the ones you used to make, Clo. I don’t want to see you hurt like that again.”

Chloe felt as though someone had chucked a tonne of bricks at her and she gazed at him, stupefied.

“I’m sorry?” she managed to croak after a second, hoping he wasn’t about to say what she thought he was going to say.

He held his hands up in supplication. “Calvin.” He said simply. “Remember what he did to you? And then what you turned into for a couple of years?”

Chloe felt her face flush with anger at the mention of her ex’s name. “What...what on _earth_ does _he_ have anything to do with you calling me and trying to stop me from—“ And then it dawned on her. This was classic Brian, overprotective brother figure, except now he had outdone himself. “Tonight wasn’t anything like what happened with Cal, Brian!” she exploded. “Benedict is nothing like that arsehole and you know it! What right do you have to—”

“I have the right, Clo, I’m your oldest friend! And I was there for you when all that shit happened and I took care of you, and hid the things you got up to from everyone! When I realised what you were planning on doing tonight I just didn’t want you to jump into anything you’re not ready for yet!” 

“It’s not up to _you_ to decide when I’m ready for something, Bry! What the hell are you thinking??” 

Suddenly a voice cut in from the hallway. “Guys! What the fuck is going on, calm down!”

Alex shuffled into the room, still swaddled in a million blankets.

“Oh, Al, I’m sorry. We didn’t mean to wake you.”

“Well I’m up in any case. What's going on?”

Chloe cast an angry glance at Brian. “Nothing.” She crossed her arms, hoping they could find a way to get Alex back into bed. She did not feel like explaining to Alex what was going on because in doing so she would need to dive into the past and explain everything, and she didn't think she could bring herself to tread those waters tonight. Or any night in the near future. “Brian was just being an offensive dickhead.”

“Since when is that news?” Alex joked, trying to inject some humour into the tense atmosphere blanketing the room.

“This time he crossed the line,” Chloe said, spearing Brian with a glare which he met head on, never one to back down if he felt he was in the right. Or even when he knew he was wrong. He was enormously headstrong (and pigheadish) that way.

“And Chloe is being a short-sighted idiot.”

“Brian, you’re such a—”

“Hey! Stop it, you two!” Alex came into the room further, holding her hands up between them. “One of you needs to tell me what is going on!”

Brian looked like he was going to say something but Chloe shut him up with a death glare, warning him they couldn’t talk about it to Alex. She didn’t need to know of Chloe’s past, the 'unruly years', as she thought of them now. She didn’t want her good friend to think any less of her.

Alex caught the look between her two flatmates and narrowed her eyes, knowing they were about to shut her out. “So who is Calvin?”

Chloe groaned inwardly, knowing it was pointless to pretend now if Alex had overheard everything. She sighed, not really knowing where to start or if she even wanted to. She threw her hands up in frustration and sat down heavily on the couch.

“I don’t know if I want to talk about it, Al.”

“Well, Clo, that’s just too bad. There’s something the two of you are keeping from me and that’s fine but not if it’s something that you’re now fighting about. We’re going to resolve this. Now.” Alex was acting the peacekeeper as she normally did.

Brian sighed. “I’ll go put the kettle on. We’ll be here a while.”

Alex sat down beside Chloe. “So. Let’s start from the beginning.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I had been debating for a while whether I should post up this chapter or not, especially since it's such a non-chapter and I left the last chapter on such a cliffhanger and I was worried no one would like this chapter in light of that. But I also really wanted to update so you guys know I haven't given up on this story. I've also gone back and edited some of the earlier chapters, adding in some small sections, just so you all know.
> 
> I hope you're not too disappointed with how the scene turned out but I think Ben has some other ideas up his sleeve for Chloe :3 
> 
> As always, constructive criticism is greatly appreciated as is the simple fact that you've taken the time to read my silly story :) Much love to you guys! Comment below so I can reconnect with you guys!
> 
> Also I've made a new playlist for this story, so if you're interested in quiet-ish, soft music to go along with this story then go [ here](http://8tracks.com/paleonpaleao3/all-about-your-heart). Not sure why making playlists seems to inspire me to continue writing but heh :D


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So torn about the way I wrote this chapter but anyway, enjoy!

On set, Benedict had just managed to sneak away and hide behind a clothing rack, a muesli bar in hand that he’d managed to snag off a catering table that had been nearly picked bare. He grumbled about being worked to the bone and being starved at the same time, ripping the wrapper off his wonderfully appetizing trail mix bar. It was better than nothing. He knew he didn’t have much time so he whipped out his phone to type up a quick text.

It had been nothing short of torture leaving Chloe so abruptly like he had done tonight, especially because she had finally been within reach after how much time had passed since they’d last seen each other. Not to mention it wasn’t what she deserved. He felt terribly guilty, replaying the look of disappointment on her face when he told her he’d be leaving. _Damn my blasted work ethic to hell_ , he thought.

_But dear God, the chemistry._ It was still there, alright. If anything, the distance between them had only served to strengthen the almost palpable electricity between them. He had to stop himself from imagining the feel of her body beneath his hands, her soft and eager lips on his mouth. He groaned softly to himself, thinking about what he could be doing with her right now if it hadn’t been for work calling him in. He traced the curves of her body in his mind’s eye, torturing himself.

Apart from thinking with a certain nether region part of his body the whole night, his actual brain had been working furiously to come up with a way to make it up to her. Ben wanted very much to just spend a day with her, to take her on a proper date. He felt somewhat ashamed with how he had behaved tonight, almost like a horny teenager. He hadn’t even taken her out on a date yet but had been entirely willing to go ahead and go to bed with her tonight. It didn’t feel right to him at all. He didn’t want her to feel as though he was _only_ interested in sleeping with her, but he always seemed to get carried away when it came to her.

Ben didn’t have the exact details worked out just yet but he had warned his PA that he would be clearing his schedule a day of this week, no matter what. He was going to take the problem of their clashing schedules into his own hands. Chloe had begun to take up a soft spot in his heart and he wanted to treat her that way. He wanted to make her feel special.

Ben could hear people calling his name and knew he didn’t have much time so he finished off the text and sent it, hoping she was still awake to see it.

He heard his name again, this time closer. He sighed tiredly, slipping his phone into his pocket.

"Alright, alright, I'm coming!" he grumbled, taking an overly vicious bite out of his muesli bar.

_* * *_

Chloe’s phone vibrated on the coffee table but she ignored it, knowing Alex would pounce on her if she tried using her phone as a distraction when they were about to talk about something important.

She gave Alex a rueful smile. “Are you sure you want to know what’s going on?” She glanced briefly at Brian and noticed he was frowning and avoiding her gaze—no doubt he was _thrilled_ to be sitting in on this discussion.

Alex nodded, her face serious. “Does this have to do with what Brian said a few weeks ago about you and Ben in his office? About how you were behaving “like you used to”?”

Chloe nodded. “It does have to do with that...I’d seriously question whether I’m behaving as I used to, though. I think Brian is just jumping to conclusions and isn’t taking into account that I’m not that person anymore.” She shot a defiant look at Brian, unable to hide the hurt in her eyes. 

Brian had the decency to look abashed under her stare.

“I just want to look out for you, Clo, you know that.”

She just shook her head and dropped her gaze, still feeling stung.

Then Chloe took a deep breath and launched into her whole sob story, feeling resigned to doing so, knowing full well that Alex wouldn’t back down, no matter what. Brian had made them all cups of tea and Chloe cradled hers as the story poured out of her, her gaze mostly focused on the steam rising off her tea, mainly to avoid the expression on Alex’s face. She only hoped that Alex wouldn’t judge her too harshly and if she did she didn’t want to see it written all over her face.

* * *

So Chloe talked about the boy who started it all and then the year or so that followed after that mess of a relationship, the events of which she was ashamed of to this day. She tried not to go into too much detail, because she had already buried those memories somewhere deep and the soil had been hitherto undisturbed—and she had thought she'd be able to keep it that way forever.

It all began with Cal. Calvin the wolf. Calvin the angel, at least at first. Chloe met him at the tender and impressionable age of fifteen and thought he was easily the coolest guy at her school. It also hadn’t helped that she met him just around the time that her parents had split up. He was a hungry wolf, looking for his next prey and she practically fell into his lap, gift wrapped and all. She thought he had been wonderful, a gift sent from the heavens at a time when she needed a distraction from the tearing apart of her childhood home, a time when she needed attention. He was also two years older than her so that lent an air of false maturity to him. She was a melodramatic teenager, and felt everything all the more keener for it, just like most teens. Even today, once Chloe felt something, loved something, she didn’t do so half-heartedly. She felt it with all of her, and it was the same back then—despite how young she was, she loved him and loved him with every fibre of her being.

Looking back on the moment they had met, she wished she had paid more attention to how his remarkably clear and bright, wonderfully blue eyes grazed over her lazily, assessing her like a piece of meat, like something he could so easily play with then dispose of. She didn’t know it then but he was one of those boys who fancied himself unbreakable, the sort of attitude that comes from being hurt at one point and choosing to go through the rest of his life crushing people simply because he could. He would walk by flowers, making sure to trample them underfoot. He would ensnare her, keeping her eyes focused on him, as he slowly trapped her where she was, keeping her right where he wanted her. He wanted her to be helpless to him and treat her heart as carelessly as he chose to, her constant adoration buoying his ego.

And all she was to him was his plaything, something to possess.

With his good looks and confident stride he easily turned a lot of heads and Chloe certainly wasn’t the only one who admired him. Really, he had the pick of the whole school, but he chose Chloe, and that in itself was the beginning, the first thing he did to make her feel special and wanted. 

Months went by, and deluded little Chloe felt as enamoured as ever, even as his manipulative and possessive side wormed its way to the surface. Calvin didn’t like her speaking to other boys, even if it was just friendly chit chat or if she had group work with other boys in her class. Brian was a particularly bad source of jealousy for Calvin. Even though she and Brian had been friends since they were nine, and even though there was no chance either of them would be interested in the other romantically, Calvin simply detested Brian and always saw him as competition, a threat to what was “rightfully his”, his _darling Lola_.

Early in the relationship Calvin had taken to _only_ calling her Lola, and she had loved it back then because no one else called her that and it was as if it was his very own name for her. Even to this day the name was tainted and just brought back memories of the spoilage of her youth, her trust and love. She had never had the heart to tell Alex just how much her middle name bothered her, knowing Alex didn’t mean any harm by it when she teased her with the name Chloe clearly didn’t like.

And so it was strange that Chloe didn’t mind it at all when Benedict used that name for her. She even _liked_ it when he used the name and that was something she never hoped to ever feel about her name. She had even been considering removing her middle name officially simply because even though she was over Calvin and all this time had passed, there were still certain things that still clung to her, things that brought her back to the mindset that she was in when she was with him. It had not been a healthy relationship by any means and a lot of emotional and mental abuse was inflicted on Chloe, not that she knew any better. She was too naive to see it and went along thinking all relationships were like that. She had also lost her virginity to Calvin, something she regretted to this day. Sex was always something that he coaxed out of her and he rarely listened when she said she didn’t want to do it. Not knowing any better it never occurred to her that the sex they had wasn’t done in love at all.

They had been together a year when it happened. She had been lying in bed, drifting off to sleep when her phone went off. She groped around for it in the dark and squinted at the screen and saw it was a picture message from Calvin. Things had been rocky between them as of late, especially after he had found out she had slept over Brian’s one night. She had just wanted one night away from the strange post-divorce atmosphere in her home and she had stayed over Brian’s so many times that she hadn’t thought twice about it, sleeping on the old air mattress on the floor like she had done countless times before. But when Calvin had found out he had been livid and it had been the first time he had tried to hurt her physically. Luckily Brian had been there to make him back off before he did anything to her.

She remembered smiling to herself that night, thinking he had sent one of his goofy goodnight photos, usually featuring him in his messy bed, blowing a silly kiss at the camera. She had hoped that he was calling a truce or was going to apologise for reacting how he had.

The camera on his phone was not the greatest so the photo was grainy but she could make out what was going on in the photo clear as day. And what she saw made her heart drop and a cold feeling spread outwards from her chest to the very tips of her fingers. The photo featured Calvin with a girl from his year group, Jessica, and they were both very naked and very definitely in the middle of fucking when Calvin decided it would be a good idea to capture the whole lovely scene, using the reflection of the giant mirror in his room to do so. With the photo was the simple message: _Hope your night with Brian was worth it. My night with Jess certainly was._

A million things ran through Chloe’s brain: hope that it might be a practical joke of some kind, a feeling of utter betrayal as it dawned on her that it couldn’t be a joke at all. She dropped her phone as she made a dash for the bathroom, only just making it as she heaved the remnants of her supper into the toilet. It was her first broken heart and needless to say, it was the last straw and she broke up with him that night. Even then it took him months to stop plaguing her, shadowing her existence. He didn’t stop being possessive simply because she had broke it off with him—in his mind she was still his. Thankfully his family eventually moved away and she never heard from him again.

And that had just been the beginning. The ugliness that ensued after was inextricably linked to being hurt and betrayed in the way she had. She spent about a year after getting into all manner of trouble, putting herself in all kinds of danger. In an effort to erase what had happened to her, the ultimate betrayal and soiling of her first love, she did everything she could think of. She slept around for all the wrong reasons, using it as an outlet for self-loathing and to act out in general, get in her ex’s face and hurt others as she had been hurt. She wanted to be the one who trampled on flowers just because she could, to stomp on people’s feelings and lives. It was irrational but she almost felt as though the more people’s feelings she hurt, the better she would feel. All the time Brian was there, covering for her, hiding everything from their parents and it had put an enormous strain on their friendship. Even so he continued to be there for her throughout this time, even while she didn’t think she deserved his friendship at all.

She had done so many things she was ashamed to think of even today and it was on the night of her seventeenth birthday when she did a complete turnaround on her life. Chloe had been at a party and was caught sleeping with her best friend’s boyfriend—by none other than the friend in particular. Seeing it firsthand the effect she had had on that girl, the complete devastation she had caused, completely snapped her out of her stupid behaviour. It opened her eyes to how unhappy she was—with how her life was going, the way she was hurting people. Most of all she was ashamed at how poorly she was treating herself, and all this over a boy and things totally out of her control such as her parents’ divorce.

So Chloe put her head down and worked incredibly hard in school, which was not something she had been doing for the longest time. She reconnected with both her parents and finally began to accept that things were different now and that they were just people too, and people fall out of love sometimes. She made more time for her siblings, including her new step-siblings from her father’s second marriage. In doing all this she finally began to heal, even if certain things from her past continued to shadow her life and affect the ways she made decisions. She had yet to bring herself to the point where she was comfortable with the idea of being in a relationship since her prior experiences to love and sex had been so warped. For the longest time she had been content keeping people at arm’s length, thinking she was doing what was right for herself, not wanting to get hurt or inflict hurt on anyone. It continued to be a huge, if irrational, fear of hers and it drove every decision she made in the way of relationships.

Meeting Benedict had changed a lot of that for her. For the first time in a long time all she wanted to do was throw herself—body, mind and heart—into whatever she had with Ben. She was petrified of something going wrong but she was happy to take it as it came and wanted to try her best at not overthinking everything. She didn’t want to be that lonely girl anymore, who never took chances for fear of things going terribly wrong. Chloe thought Ben seemed to be well worth it.

* * *

They all sat in silence for a while as everyone processed what Chloe had just recounted. Chloe kept her gaze down, afraid that this would have changed Alex’s opinion of her, afraid she’d see it on her friend’s face.

But to her surprise Alex pulled her into a tight hug.

“I’m sorry that happened to you, Clo.” Alex’s voice was muffled against Chloe’s shoulder. “I wish I’d known sooner but I understand why you felt you couldn’t say anything.” A lot of things made sense to Alex in light of what Chloe had just confided in her—her fear of dating, how distant she usually kept herself, her hatred of her own middle name.

Alex pulled away from the hug. “I promise to never use your middle name again, Clo. I’m sorry I pestered you with it.”

Chloe waved a hand at her. “It’s okay, it’s not like you knew anything about it.” She wiped under her eyes for stray tears. “I never wanted to tell you any of this, never wanted to tell _anyone_ any of it.” She laughed bitterly. “Maybe I wanted more time to hide what I’m really like.”

Alex lightly swatted Chloe’s arm. “Don’t talk like that, Clo. It isn’t who you are and it isn’t what you’re like at all. I don’t think you did any of that stuff because you’re inherently a _bad_ person.” She paused, noticing Chloe’s eyes beginning to glisten with tears again. “I think you did those things to cope with what would overwhelm anyone, let alone a young girl. Stop beating yourself up over it. You’ve come a long way, my honey boo boo child,” she said, smiling, trying to get the other girl to laugh.

Chloe cracked a small smile. “So you don’t hate me?” she asked jokingly.

In answer Alex pulled her into another hug. “It would take a lot for me to hate you, you silly cow.”

Relief flooded through Chloe’s system. “That’s good to hear, my homebitch.”

Alex sniggered. “That’s my girl. Enough moping, okay?” They pulled away from the hug and Chloe nodded, feeling as though a huge weight had lifted off her chest. She was surprised coming clean about this stuff made her feel this much better.

Alex scratched her chin thoughtfully. “So whatever happened to Calvin?”

Chloe shrugged. “Like I said, he moved away and we didn’t exactly stay in touch.”

Alex sighed. “Shame you don’t know what happened to him. I have a mind to find him and put his balls in a vice, to be honest. What a complete dickhead.” She gave Chloe another hug.

“Now,” Alex said, clapping her hands together decisively, looking between Brian and Chloe. “Now that I’m all up to speed about Chloe’s sordid history—“ she was cut off by Chloe exclaiming “Excuse me!”

“I think we can try to address the little fight you guys just had,” Alex ploughed on ahead. She turned to Brian. “So what happened?”

He sighed heavily. Most of the anger and defiance had leeched away with Chloe recounting her side of what happened. It was hard to hold onto being angry after hearing what had happened from Chloe’s point of view. Even so, he still held on to the reasons he tried stopping Chloe from sleeping with Benedict.

Finally Brian spoke up, giving Alex a brief summary of what had happened and Chloe followed after with her side, omitting some of the more interesting but unnecessary details of her little interlude with Ben that night. “When I realised that Chloe was coming home with Benedict I worried that she wasn’t ready for it...I don’t know...the way Chloe has been sneaking around with this guy just reminded me of how she used to be. And don’t you think she’s moving a little fast?”

Chloe, a look of outrage on her face, had no idea where to start first. “Bry! I haven’t been _sneaking around_! And as for me being ready for it, that isn’t your business and neither is it your business how fast I decide to take things. As if you can talk anyway, how long does it take you to bed whatever airhead you chase every week?” She struggled to find the words. “I don’t know, I thought you’d be happy for me. For the first time since Calvin I actually _want_ to see what might happen with another person. I’m actually interested in pursuing whatever it is Benedict and I might have.” She stared at him incredulously. “It’s like you don’t even know me.”

Brian frowned and opened his mouth to speak but Alex cut him off. “You’ve both had your turns to speak, so just hear me out.” She took a deep breath and turned to him. “Brian, I think you have your heart in the right place but you need to stop trying to protect Chloe. She isn’t the same lost teenager who made those mistakes and you don’t need to take care of her all the time. She’s a big girl now and you need to stop thinking you have to act like a big brother to her, she already has two whole, authentic brothers after all. I think you’d just get in the way.” She smiled, poking Brian in the arm. “And Benedict is a good guy...I don’t think you need to worry about him not doing the right thing by little Chloe here.”

Chloe gave her a small frown at Alex referring to her as “little Chloe” but otherwise agreed with her. Alex had this way of calming down a situation and dissecting it until it seemed she almost knew it better than the actual people involved. It’s what made her such an excellent peacekeeper in all kinds of situations. Chloe knew she could go to her about a problem and she’d steer her in the right direction. She may be one of the most impulsive people she knew but she could also be one of the most level-headed.

Alex turned to Chloe. “Now, I don’t have anything to say to you because I think it’s mostly Brian that needs a reality check.” Brian groaned, throwing up his hands. Alex continued like she hadn’t heard him. “I’m just happy that you’re coming out of your little bubble wrapped shell, Clo. So...Ben was actually here?”

Chloe bit her lip and nodded, a big grin threatening to break across her face.

Alex grabbed Chloe’s arm and squealed. “How far did you get? Is he good? Is his body actually as gorgeous in real life as in the movies?” She did a big show of looking around, as if Ben would pop out of the furniture. “Actually, where is he?”

Chloe sighed. “He got called in to work, big deadline, scenes needed re-shooting, something about worrying his arse would be breakfast or something…” she mumbled unhappily, still feeling a tad disappointed about how the night had turned out.

Alex’s mouth twitched to the side. “He must be pretty dedicated to his work if he was willing to miss out on all this action right here,” she said gesturing at Chloe’s body, making her snort with laughter.

“Stop it. It sounded important.” But even as Chloe said it she frowned a little, beginning to wonder about how eager he was to leave. What if he had thought it was a mistake to sleep together tonight? He had seemed pretty keen and she felt as though they had really connected tonight but now she wasn’t so sure. Maybe Brian had been right and maybe Ben thought they were going too fast.

Seeing the sudden change in her facial expression, Alex rushed to reassure Chloe. “You’re probably right, I’m sure he wouldn’t leave you for just anything, I mean you haven’t even properly seen each other in ages right? Apart from calls on Skype.” She rubbed Chloe’s back briskly. “Remember, don’t overthink it.”

Chloe smiled weakly. “You should go to bed, Al. You look awful.”

Alex laughed, stifling a cough. “I feel pretty awful.” She looked between her two flatmates. “So are you guys good? Do you still need to talk this out?”

They looked at each other, all defiance gone. She knew she needed to talk this out a little more with Brian but she felt they had had enough for one night, and he seemed to agree as he shook his head in answer to Alex’s question. “I think we’re good.” He gave her a small, tentative smile.

Chloe smiled in return and nodded. “We’re good. Just don’t ever try to interfere in my love life again, please.”

Brian laughed and stood, offering a hand to Chloe. She took it and he pulled her into a tight bear hug, his strong arms practically crushing her. Even so, she took comfort in the gesture, knowing it was Brian’s way of saying he was sorry and that he cared and she cherished their friendship, despite their differences in opinion.

They pulled away from the hug and Brian gruffly cleared his throat. “Now off to bed with the two of you, it’s way past a decent bedtime,” he said in a deep, commanding voice. “Especially _you_ , young lady.” He pointed at Alex.

Chloe just laughed and allowed herself to be shooed from the room, but not before turning back briefly to look at two of her closest friends. Brian was helping Alex up and she smiled and laughed, letting him fuss over her with an expression in her eyes Chloe couldn’t quite put her finger on.

* * *

Chloe had just pulled the covers up to her chin and was slowly drifting off to sleep when she remembered she had gotten a text right before the talk. She threw her hand out in the dark, aiming for her bedside table and after a bit of scrabbling around for it she found her phone.

She smiled as she realised it was from Ben.

_Sorry I had to leave in such a rush tonight. It seems I have the best of luck when it comes to timing. I want to make it up to you, love...maybe with a proper date? So how about this Saturday? xx_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know if I go into too much unnecessary detail or waffle on too much because I think that is one of my problems :/ I know this was a long chapter, with hardly any Ben but I'm planning on posting the next chapter in the next few days hopefully to make up for it and honestly, I'm looking forward to posting up the cutesy stuff that's coming up :3 Anyway, if you read this whole chapter, well done! It was a long one :D and just know that I love you ^-^
> 
> Thanks for reading and please feel free to comment and let me hear your thoughts on this silly fic :) I love hearing from you guys.
> 
> [All About Your Heart playlist](http://8tracks.com/paleonpaleao3/all-about-your-heart).


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben takes Chloe out on their first date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a much more lighthearted chapter ^-^ Hope you enjoy!

The next morning Chloe woke up after only a couple of hours sleep, still feeling emotionally exhausted from talking to Alex the night before. For a moment she regretted all of it. She felt laid bare, like this ugly part of her had been exposed and she’d wanted so badly to just keep it hidden from everyone. But it was out now. She’d gone on for a long time thinking that keeping it hidden was the way to go, the only way to move forward.

But...at the same time she noticed that with the mental exhaustion there was also a feeling of clarity. Pushing what had happened to the back of her mind hadn’t helped her. The fact that she still made decisions based on what had happened in the past made that clear. It was holding her back. It felt better that she had nothing to hide anymore, or at least not from Alex. It felt like at least a small step forward.

She resolved to just be open about her past, if it ever came up again. These things always found a way to the light, regardless of what you did, and perhaps it was better to just go with it, rather than fight it.

Chloe shook her head to herself, not really sure where her train of thought was going. She lay there for a while, watching her room grow steadily lighter with the rising sun, until she could hear Alex and Brian moving about the flat. She wasn’t sure she wanted to face them yet, for fear of any awkwardness.

Then the smell of waffles drifted in under her door, making her tummy rumble loudly so she decided to just get out of bed and face them. She'd get waffles at the very least, which was a win whatever happened.

Chloe was surprised at how normal Alex was behaving and whether or not she was putting it on to make Chloe feel comfortable or if she really felt that way, she still appreciated it. Brian tip-toed a little around her, however, but that was probably because they still needed to work through some things. But they talked as normally as they could until the awkwardness dissipated.

* * *

The rest of the week passed by in that snail’s pace way it does when you’re looking forward to something. Chloe thought about what was going to happen on Saturday with increasing excitement and equal amounts of nervousness. Chloe tried asking Benedict what he had in mind for their first official date but he was keeping his lips sealed about it. All she knew was to be ready by midday and that he’d be picking her up at her flat. After a couple of days, both Alex and Brian had grown quite tired of Chloe’s near constant musing and talking about where they might go and what they might do.

“I’m sure it’s going to be really special, Clo,” Alex said for the millionth time, tapping away at her keyboard, eyes on her computer screen. She didn’t even bother to turn around to look at Chloe who had planted herself in the middle of Alex’s bed and had started up talking about the date again. “Why do you need to overthink these things? Why not just roll with it and let it happen and take it as it comes? Stop behaving like a bloody martian, sheesh.”

Chloe, hearing the exasperation in her friend’s voice, took the cue and decided to shut up about it. She knew it was weird how she was obsessing over this, but it was her first proper date in a long time and she didn’t want to mess it up. She took Alex’s advice and for the rest of the week she allowed herself to feel excited but tried to steer clear of any pessimistic thoughts…and from talking about it, because while they were happy for her, it was clear that they had heard enough about the date. 

* * *

Saturday morning finally came and Chloe practically leapt out of her bed in excitement. She breezed out of her room and into the kitchen, humming happily. She had breakfast and got ready, feeling the familiar dip in her belly as if she were on a roller coaster every time she thought of seeing Ben. She marvelled at how happy she felt just at the _thought_ of seeing him.

In the middle of a very loud, badly sung version of the absolutely moving Sugababes song _Push the Button_ , Alex, laughing, leaned out of her bedroom door and yelled “Let me get ready for work in peace!”

So Chloe simply sung louder and did a weird dance shuffle towards Alex and sang to her. “ _If you’re ready for me boyyy, you’d better push the button and let me knowww_ …”

“Don’t think I won’t film this and post it on your Wall, Clo,” Alex warned her, as Chloe grasped her hands and tried to get her to dance.

And then of course, quick as lightning, Brian appeared behind Chloe and added his voice to the noise and to Alex’s surprise, they even had a matching dance routine for this song. In the end she felt she had to shut her bedroom door on her flatmates when they started twerking enthusiastically.

As midday approached, Chloe was sitting on the couch, killing time by checking on her favourite blogs and YouTube channels. Alex was sitting on the couch next to her, lacing up her shoes, trying to ignore Chloe tapping her foot incessantly. She knew it was out of nervousness as well as excitement so tried not to snap at her to stop it. It certainly was a step up from being sung to at least.

Just then Chloe’s phone went off. It was Benedict, letting her know he was there.

She made a tiny, excited noise in the back of her throat and grabbed her stuff.

"Well, I'm off!" she said as she breezed through the door. "I'll see you later! Have a good day at work!"

“Have fun!” Alex called after her.

Chloe tried not to take the stairs two at a time. _Was it normal to be this excited about a date_? she wondered idly. When she made it out of the front of the building she spotted Ben almost immediately. 

He was leaning against his car, looking cooly casual in black jeans, a neat button up shirt and a leather jacket. His hair was combed back neatly in that way she liked very much and when he smiled and waved at her, she very nearly sank to her knees. She sighed inwardly, loving what she saw. 

"Your chariot, my lady," he said, gesturing to the car and then immediately winced. "Sorry, that was terrible. The words just seemed to fall out of my mouth." 

Chloe chuckled, stepping up to the car, his wonderful cologne wafting towards her now that she was closer. "Maybe my faulty brain-to-mouth filter is rubbing off on you," she suggested. 

"You may be right," he said, laughing. He opened the passenger side door for her and she slid in, thanking him. 

Once they were both seated in the car and buckled in, she didn't hesitate and asked "So do I get to know where we're going now?" 

Ben chuckled. “I guess so,” he said, putting on a laboured sigh, his eyes alight with amusement, letting her know he wasn’t being serious. “I'll give you a brief overview. I'm going to take you to a couple of my favourite places...it's all going to be fairly simple, so I hope you're not disappointed." 

"What, were you afraid I'd be expecting a horse and carriage, fine dining and a grand display of fireworks just for us?" she teased. 

"What _were_ you expecting?" 

Chloe thought about it for a moment. "To be honest, I don't know, hence why I was trying to get you to tell me. But I figured it would be special whatever we do, since it's well...you." She was glad he was driving and couldn't see she had gone red as a damned beetroot. "I'd enjoy spending time with you wherever you took me..." she trailed off shyly. For the millionth time in her life, she damned her skin for making it hard to hide it when she got flustered. Stupid genes. 

Unfortunately for her, they had stopped at a traffic light and he looked over at her then. But he had that fond look in his eyes, his lips curled into a soft smile as his eyes roamed over her face. 

"I'm really happy we can do this finally," he said simply, touching her cheek briefly. 

Chloe settled back into the seat, enjoying the patches of sunshine they were getting as they sped through the city. 

The date was pleasantly average in terms of what they did and he was always mindful of keeping a low profile. He seemed to know exactly where they'd find quiet spots to go to. She supposed it was necessary for him, especially if he wanted to spend time outside without being spotted. First he took her to a wonderful woodland park with little clearings, pathways and streams scattered throughout flowering trees and shrubs. It was the perfect time of the year for a little trip like this, all the flowers out in bloom, the air filled with the sweet scent of the greenery all around them.

Ben had decided to take Chloe to the woodland park because in the brief time he spent in her flat he noticed her room was decorated with dried flowers and handmade flower arrangements. He knew how beautiful the park was, and thought she would appreciate it. To Chloe this was probably one of the best places he could have taken her, as she did have a fondness for plants and flowers. She picked some colourful marigolds and carnations as they walked and she was surprised to learn that he had an appreciation for green growing things as well, instilled in him by his mother who kept a beautiful garden of her own.

“That’s the same with me too,” Chloe said, feeling a little surprised at finding out this little quality they both had in common. Chloe mentioned her own mother’s enthusiasm for gardening and how even now Chloe loved keeping flowers and small potted plants in her flat because it reminded her of her childhood home. “She’d probably love you,” she said, laughing.

“Would she?” he asked. Following her example, Ben had started picking flowers too and was handing them to Chloe. She would accept them with a smile and they were added to the growing bouquet in her hands.

“Mhmm. Any man with an appreciation for gardens paired with a mountain of charm would win her over.” She glanced at him coyly. “And not to mention good looks. I mean who would stand a chance against that?" She paused, leaning in as if confiding in him. "I certainly hadn't stood a chance," she whispered behind a hand.

By now they had stopped beneath a tree and she was looking up at him, the patches of shadow cast by passing clouds and dappled sunlight playing over his almost elfin features. _God, he’s so handsome_ , she thought to herself.

“Is that so, Lola?” 

Her heart skipped a beat as he leaned in for a kiss, tilting her chin up so their lips met perfectly. It was a gentle kiss but there was so much tension behind it, as if they both were holding themselves back. Before pulling away she gently and briefly bit his lower lip and smiled when he groaned quietly. 

“Ever the tease,” he muttered, his eyes dark with lust, making her stomach flip. He kissed her again briefly, applying more pressure this time. It was all she could do not to throw him down in the grass amongst the wildflowers and do whatever she pleased to him. 

After the beautiful gardens, he took her to a pleasant, cozy little café where they had a late lunch. There they sheltered from the patches of rain that were becoming more frequent as the day wore on, darker clouds starting to move in now. They sat close, their heads together, hands touching, tracing each other’s skin idly as they talked. They had their own comfortable little bubble in that café and she was captivated by him more than ever. 

Afterwards they went to see a movie at a somewhat rundown looking theatre that he mentioned he frequented when he was younger. 

"Amazed it's still here,” he mused, staring up at the old letters adorning the front of the theatre. “But I have so many good memories here and it’s never busy, even on a Saturday.” He smiled down at her and tugged her towards the doors. 

“Do you miss anonymity at all?” she asked suddenly. 

He thought for a moment. “Well, I suppose I do sometimes, especially lately.” They went up to the counter and he asked for two tickets for a light-hearted film that they had agreed on earlier in the day. As they went in to the almost empty theatre he continued in a lowered voice. “It’s sort of hard to explain. Working in this field and building my career is something I’ve been working towards for so long but dealing with the fame that has come with it was— _is—_ a steep learning curve. The lack of privacy is something you can deal with though and it’s just part of the job.” He shrugged, as if it was nothing, which Chloe was sure it wasn’t. “At the end of the day, I love my job and I try to keep myself surrounded by good people, family and friends...that’s all that really matters, I think.” 

Chloe smiled at him and kissed his cheek. “I really like you, you know that?” 

He gave her the cutest grin and kissed her forehead. “I like you too, Chloe.” 

Throughout the movie they held hands and exchanged chaste, quick kisses in the dark of the theatre, each one igniting that special spark in her, each one making her greedy for more. She remembered their brief and exciting encounters—in his makeshift office, in her room—and she felt muscles deep in her belly clench deliciously at the thought. 

By the time they left the theatre, night had fallen and more storm clouds had moved in, throwing rain down on them as they ran back to his car, laughing.  

“I never have an umbrella handy when I actually need one,” he bemoaned as they got in, shutting out the noise of the storm outside. A sudden clap of thunder rang out over their heads. 

“I know what you mean,” she laughed. “I have about ten handbag-sized umbrellas scattered all over my flat that never _actually_ make it into my bag.” She looked down at her wet clothes. “I’m sorry I’m getting water all over your car.” 

He chuckled and waved her apology away, putting the car into drive and they talked about the movie on the way back to Chloe’s flat, music playing quietly in the background. Chloe sunk back into her seat, cocooned by the comfortable and warm atmosphere in the car. She glanced over at him often, watching him as he spoke, basking in the pleasant feeling growing in her chest, threatening to overwhelm her. Just as often her gaze would skitter away shyly, especially when he’d glance over at her. 

Ben pulled to a stop outside Chloe’s flat and she turned to face him, seeking out his face in the gloom of the car. He held her gaze with his own and they sat in the relative quiet of the car as the tension between them slowly began to build up, threatening to break over their heads and sweep them under. 

Chloe finally broke the silence. "Thanks for a really wonderful day, Ben." It had been perfect, actually. 

"The pleasure was mine.” He gave her an adorable lopsided grin and that was enough to send her over. She'd been holding back rather admirably the whole day but all of their quick kisses, the innocent brushing of fingertips against skin as they held hands, all of these simple things only served to stoke the burning desire in her. And they were finally properly alone now. 

Chloe leaned in quickly, kissing him lightly, still showing restraint for fear of coming on too strong. But that restraint quickly fell away when he pulled her to him and kissed her back, deepening their kiss. She gave a small gasp, shifting herself in the small space, needing to be closer. Their kisses became deeper, more eager as their mouths opened to allow each other more access. She could feel her body responding to him, her heart beating more rapidly, warm blood rushing to her skin, her body practically begging to be touched. 

She pulled away from the kiss reluctantly and tried to slow her breathing. “Do you want to come up to my flat?” she asked. She took in his eyes heavy lidded with lust and she thought she knew what he’d say, but still felt a niggling worry in the back of her mind, not wanting him to reject her. 

Ben nodded wordlessly, not trusting himself to speak properly. He kissed her again, more softly this time, before turning the car off and jumping out into the torrential rain. He came around and opened the door for her, offering his hand. She happily took it and tugged him towards her building. 

They made the short trip up a couple of flights of stairs and when they entered the flat, Chloe called out to see who was home. When no one answered, she turned to Ben with that coy smile he liked so much, mischief in her eyes. 

“I guess we have the place to ourselves.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and I really hope you enjoyed this chapter :) I love writing about cutesy Chloe/Ben ^-^  
> Please feel free to comment down below, I love hearing from you guys. 
> 
> Hehe, if anyone is interested in hearing the song I referred to in this chapter (or if you've never heard it before) just go [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJDGcxAf9D8) :D horay for terribly, if catchy, pop songs ^-^
> 
> [All About Your Heart](http://8tracks.com/paleonpaleao3/all-about-your-heart) playlist, because I like soundtracks to movies, so why not make a soundtrack for my silly writing? :D
> 
> Just a little note (and almost a spoiler) about the next chapter: it may be a bit explicit so just let me know if that might be something I should tone down a little or if it might be something that'll make anyone uncomfortable. 
> 
> Thanks again for stopping by!


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a wee warning, this chapter has some smut in it ;3

Chloe took Ben’s hand and led him to her room. She dropped her rather damp bag by the door and turned to him, looking suddenly quite shy again. It made him want to envelope her in his arms and kiss away any uncertainty she was feeling.

“Can I get you anything?” she asked, just wanting something to say.

He shook his head. “I’m fine, thank you.” All he wanted was standing right in front of him and he felt like saying so...but the words caught in his throat. He imagined it would be cheesy as hell anyway. Instead he pulled her to him gently. She looked up at him from beneath her eyelashes and he felt his chest constrict.

“I really, _really_ like you, Chloe,” he said quietly, vaguely feeling as though he couldn’t pull enough air into his lungs while looking at her.

Chloe blinked, a smile spreading across her face. She was probably wearing the goofiest smile but he was looking at her like she was radiant, in a way no one had looked at her before, so she didn’t mind looking like a grinning fool. “I really like you too, Ben.” _You have no idea how much_.  

Ben leaned in and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “I’m really glad to hear it,” he murmured, his low voice making her shiver wonderfully. She wanted his lips against hers so badly. So she reached up and placed her hands either side of his face, drawing him to her. Their lips met and she almost sighed, loving how it felt, the feeling enveloping her.

Somewhere amongst the sweet, little kisses, their hunger surfaced. Suddenly he was crushing her against his body, kissing her eagerly. She gave a small moan that shot straight to his groin as she kissed him back hungrily. Their fervent kisses turned clumsy as they struggled to get each other out of their wet clothes, teeth knocking against teeth. Chloe giggled and Ben smiled in turn, the sound of her delightful laugh filling his ears.

He found the zip of her dress and unzipped it slowly, revelling in the feel of her skin under his hands as he eased it off her, the way she sucked in a breath in surprise. The dress pooled at her feet in a damp heap and she gingerly kicked it to the side. He took a small step back, air rushing out of his lungs as he took in the sight of her in the warm light of her room. She stood there in her bra and knickers, her cheeks a faint pink, her lips a little swollen from their kisses.  

“Just look at you,” he said reverently.

Chloe gave him a slow, shy smile and stepped closer to him, kissing him again. She began tugging at his clothes and he obliged, breaking their kiss a moment to pull off his jacket. In a perhaps over-eager fashion, she began pulling up his shirt and he laughed, letting her help him as she tried not to tear the shirt off him. Her eyes grazed his broad, naked shoulders, chest and torso. She pressed her body up against his, nipping at his neck and shoulders lightly, marvelling at the feel of his warm skin against her lips, hardly daring to believe this was actually happening. 

He looked and felt perfect to her.  “Just look at _you_ ,” she murmured against his skin, still trailing kisses and little bites across his skin. She held him, dizzy with desire and a warm feeling spreading through her chest.

Ben pressed his lips to the top of her head and she lifted her face as if to the sun. They kissed and kissed, the kisses slowly becoming more ravenous again. He caressed her back, stroking lines of fire wherever he touched her skin. She gave a quiet moan in anticipation against his mouth as his fingers made quick work of her bra, unclasping them and swiftly removing it. It was thrown who knows where and finally his hands cupped her breasts, Chloe letting out a small gasp as his thumbs grazed her nipples. She bit her lip, gazing at him with half-lidded eyes. He swallowed. There were times such as these when her normally big, doe eyes went rather bedroomy and sensual, something about the way she dropped her eyelids, gazing at him from under her lashes—it drove him crazy. He gave her a wolfish grin before scooping her up easily and setting her on the edge of her bed.

Chloe’s chest rose and fell with each quick breath, anticipation making her unashamedly arch her back ever so slightly, a wordless hint. So Ben lowered his head and closed his lips around one nipple, his hand gently, expertly stroking the other breast.

Chloe moaned loudly, running her hands through his hair, coaxing him on.

“Oh how _long_ I’ve wanted to do this, Lola,” he breathed, his voice low and sensual. The tender flesh between her legs responded to his voice immediately, moistening even more. He was already driving her crazy with his touch, his warm mouth on her skin, and his voice caressing her, just as his lithe, expert hands were.

Ben kissed her other breast just as lovingly, just as softly, before moving to kiss the skin of her belly, moving lower and lower. She gasped as his lips brushed the top of her lace underwear. He glanced up at her and smiled slowly before moving to kiss the tops of her thighs. She exhaled a breath she hadn’t known she was holding.

Ben gently pushed her legs apart. She didn’t need much convincing and immediately opened them for him, anticipation coiling in her, making her feel tightly wound and on the edge of snapping entirely, all self control fleeing. He made things worse by nipping at the sensitive flesh of her inner thighs lightly, making her mouth open a little in a silent gasp. He looked up at her and she had to catch her breath at the amazing sight before her, this gorgeous specimen of a man kneeling before her, his mouth so very close to the spot she longed for him to pay attention to.

Ben ran his big hands along her thighs and she felt mesmerised by the sight of them on her skin, finding it unbelievably exciting. He watched her face as he inched his hand closer to its destination. He leant forward and placed a gentle kiss against her panties, right against her sex and she bit her lip to keep herself from gasping loudly. He smiled at her wolfishly, clearly enjoying himself. He ran a finger up and down against the soft fabric of her underwear, stroking her teasingly. She groaned quietly and closed her eyes, wondering how much more teasing she could take. He kissed her there again but the fabric of her panties kept its torturous barrier between his mouth and touch and her. As much as he was taking his sweet time with her, she knew by the tense set in his shoulders, the bulge straining against his pants, that he was holding himself back and that it was taking a lot of effort to do so.

Chloe didn’t want him to hold anything back, not now that they were finally together.

“Please, Benedict,” she moaned, pleading with her eyes. “Stop teasing me.”

“Oh, love,” he whispered, kissing her again and again as he continued stroking her. “Now you know how hard it is being teased,” he said, grinning up at her.

Chloe pouted at him but he kept up his torturing. “That’s not fair, Ben.” She wriggled closer to his mouth, raising her hips a little. “Don’t you want me?”

His eyes were dark with lust as he gazed at her. “Of course I want you, Chloe. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this, how often I’ve dreamed of doing just this.” And with that he eased her underwear off her hips in one quick motion, revealing her. That alone sent another ache through her, strangely, just the feeling of being naked before him. She unashamedly lifted her hips a little, wanting him so much closer, right there. He locked eyes with her as he leant in and placed a kiss there and then with excruciating slowness, licked the soft flesh.

Her body had felt so tense, so coiled with anticipation and now she almost went limp. Chloe let out a breath she hadn’t known she was holding as her mouth opened in a silent moan and she leant her head back. As if coaxed on by her reaction, he continued to slowly run his tongue up and down, driving her crazy, moaning a little himself. His large, warm hands were gently kneading her thighs, holding them open. Before she could prepare herself for it, he slipped a finger inside her and she closed her eyes tightly, gasping. She let out a moan, as the universe became just his mouth and his touch on her.

Ben slowly quickened the pace and she felt that tension build inside her, swelling up before breaking, her orgasm crashing through her. She clamped a hand over her mouth as she let out a loud moan. He slipped out his finger and kissed her sex gently as she rode out the orgasm, her limbs going languid, allowing herself to lie back.

Quick as a thought he was over her, kissing her mouth ravenously. She could taste herself on him and that strangely turned her on even more. Chloe fumbled with his belt and jeans and he made quick work of taking them off. She looked down to see his naked body in its entirety and she took his erection in her hands and gently stroked him. She smiled as his eyes closed, his face the picture of pleasure.

“Chloe,” he breathed.

She kissed him, loving that she could have an effect on him.

Ben leant down and kissed her neck, then nipped at her earlobe slightly. He groaned as her thumb flicked over the head of his penis, using the slight moisture there to lubricate her fingers as she deftly worked his shaft with her delicate hands.

He groaned into her neck and she loved the sound of it, reverberating through her. She guided him to her lips and gently rubbed the head against herself. They both moaned together as their flesh met, as Chloe teased both herself and Ben.

Finally Ben spoke up, his voice strained. “I know this is a bit of a mood spoiler, but how are you for birth control?”

She smiled slightly. “I’m on the pill.” She kissed him, biting his lower lip slightly, getting another little moan out of him. “But we should probably also get a condom.”

He nodded and kissed her neck, rolling off her. He got up and her eyes followed his naked body as he found his jeans and quickly found his wallet, producing a condom with a flourish. She tried not to think about why he might have been so prepared that he already had a condom on him, but couldn’t help wondering if he often had spontaneous sex.

The sight of Ben and his fantastic fucking body climbing back on to her bed and kissing her chased those jealous thoughts away completely. She reminded herself that he was here now, with her, and that was what mattered. He touched the slickness between her thighs, making her squirm for more.

“Please, Ben…” she whispered, looking at him from under her eyelashes. “I’ve waited so fucking long for this.”

“Me too, love,” he murmured against her lips.

***

Chloe stared up at her ceiling hours later, the light turning that muted, soft grey right before the sunrise. She kept drifting in and out of sleep, wakefulness never being too far away. She smiled to herself in some amusement as she looked over at Ben’s sleeping form next to her. He had very nearly completely burrowed under the covers, looking cute and snuggly with just the top of his head visible. Warmth bloomed in her chest.

Figuring sleep was never going to come to her she decided a shower wouldn’t hurt and got out of bed as gently as she could, not wanting to wake Benedict. She tip toed out of her room and padded towards the bathroom, shutting the door behind her quietly. When she stepped under the hot water, she sighed contentedly, stretching. While she showered and worked soap into a rich, thick lather over her body, her hands ran over the places he had touched and she realised she was deliciously sore in some places. She remembered how amazing it had felt to have his hands on her. She shivered slightly under the hot water, remembering last night, immersing herself in the memory of it. She leant her head against the tiles of the shower, her breath leaving her in a _whoosh_.

***

Ben stirred from sleep slowly to the sound of a shower nearby. For a confused, sleepy moment he thought he was at home in his own flat until he registered dimly that this wasn’t his bed, that he was surrounded by a distinct soft scent. Eyes still closed, he smiled to himself as he realised the soft, powdery scent belonged to Chloe and he was indeed in her bed. He opened his eyes, taking in the room in sleepy blinks.

He noticed flowers strung up above her desk in colourful bunches, where she had hung them up to dry. He could hazard a guess at the names of a couple of them. He took in the tackboard full of photos, most of them featuring her family and friends. The door was open just a crack which is where the sound of the shower was coming from, more bouquets of blooms drying around her doorframe. A tall, old and well loved bookcase crammed with books stood against one wall. He smiled, enjoying being around things that were hers.

When Chloe came back, Ben was most of the way awake and sitting on the edge of her bed, waiting for her. He was wrapped in one of her blankets, looking amazing blinking at her sleepily in the watery sunshine coming through her window. Her heart felt like it swelled at the sight of him and she revelled in the feel of the growing feeling in her heart for him.

“Morning,” he said, his voice more gravelly with sleep. He held out his arms in welcome and she padded over to him. He wrapped his arms around her waist as she curled her arms around his neck, her fingers sliding easily through his hair. This simple embrace felt wonderful and different, his touch becoming something more familiar and intimate to her.

“Morning,” she answered, smiling softly, warmth spreading through her. “Did you want some breakfast?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading this far into my silly fic! I know I update sporadically and I'm sorry to anyone who cares. Anyway, hope you guys enjoyed this installment :) I hope it wasn't too embarrassing to read, haha!
> 
> [Silly playlists I make for my fics](http://8tracks.com/paleonpaleao3/mixes/) for anyone who might be interested :D


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